Karens seem to be everywhere these days, but some really know how to go the extra mile. These entitled gems pull all sorts of antics, from harassing customer service workers to throwing full-blown tantrums over nothing. Of course, as poisonous as they are, their idiocy is SO ridiculous—it's impossible to look away.
1. A Taste Of Her Own Medicine
When my boyfriend was 14, he was living with his mom and sister on a housing estate. It was summer and he liked a bit of light in his upstairs bedroom, so he left the curtains open at all times. That included when he was getting dressed and after having a shower, so if you purposefully stared at his window, you could see him from his waist up (and only his waist up).
Well, their neighbor did not like that one bit. She went pounding on their door, yelling at my mother-in-law that her son was a disgrace, hanging around always undressed and exposing himself to her daughter. My mother-in-law told her he had every right to do whatever he wanted in his bedroom, and that if they didn't want to see him all they needed to do was not to look.
A couple of days went by and lo and behold, the authorities showed up at the neighbor’s door. Turned out the neighbor had been filming and taking pictures of my boyfriend to show to the housing people as evidence of his wrongdoing to get them kicked out. Except that the housing office called the authorities on her for taking pictures and videos of an underage kid and kicked her and her family out.
2. All Yolked Up
Once, when I was working at this insanely popular breakfast joint, this seemingly adorable old couple walked in. After I ran them through our specials at their request, the woman ordered the duck hash, and the man ordered two boring poached eggs on toast. All was good...until I brought them their food. The guy started freaking out, and when I asked him what was wrong, his response made my blood boil.
Apparently, he was upset that I didn't bring him a tablespoon for his eggs. Granted, he didn't ask for one, but according to him, everyone knows that poached eggs are supposed to be served with a tablespoon. I've been a waitress for nearly a decade and I've served many poached eggs—yet I never heard this rule. Nevertheless, I apologized profusely and told him I would go grab him a spoon.
I thought that would be the end of it, but I was wrong. He proceeded to yell, "No! My breakfast is ruined now!" Then, he threw his plate of food at me and stormed out. His wife gave me a sympathetic smile as she slinked out behind him. I had to work the next eight hours with egg yolk stains all over me.
3. Clinging To The Vine
I worked at a vineyard where we got the occasional limo full of sloshed people. We do not allow them in because we are not a bar and do not serve trashed people. Occasionally, the manager is away from the door, and that is when these people will attempt to sneak in. I had to approach one of them and tell them politely that their party had too much to drink and had to leave.
Well, turns out she was the Karen of all Karens. Her answer made me clench my fist: "I'm not going anywhere". I assured her that my staff would not serve her, so it was pointless to insist on staying. I told her if she didn’t leave within five minutes, she would be escorted out by an officer. She didn’t believe me, so I called the local officer we have on-call right in front of her.
I said, "He is on his way. I suggest you leave if you want to save yourself the embarrassment". As I was going out the side door to get the number off the limo’s plate, she followed me into the back office. Her next move had me livid. She pushed me into a filing cabinet and said, "WE AREN’T LEAVING". Then, her group came back, grabbed her, and they sped off in their limo.
The officer arrived a minute later, and I gave him the plate number to give them a little scare. All this for a glass of vino. It happens at least three to five times a year.
4. Border Brouhaha
My mother is a Karen who also happens to be totally fluent in Spanish. We were at the Mexico City airport flying to Juarez. We were bringing back a bunch of plates and stuff my mom got while we were there. They were in this huge box. When we got to the check-in counter, the guy said she needed to have the box wrapped. My mother became deeply offended by that.
She yelled, “WELL, I’VE NEVER HAD TO DO THAT BEFORE!! I BRING STUFF FROM MEXICO CITY ALL THE TIME, AND I’VE NEVER HAD TO DO THAT”! Her screaming caused some bewildered stares in her direction. This was a very white woman arguing angrily in absolutely flawless Spanish. That in itself was intriguing enough.
The guy again demanded that she needed to go get the box wrapped with tape, and that would be an extra charge of about 200 pesos (around $10). Instead of doing that, she stormed off, leaving a massive, unidentified box completely unattended—just what airport announcements always tell you NEVER TO DO. My dad and I had already checked in and made it through security while this was unfolding.
My mom joined us at the gate in a huff, regaling us about this slight against her honor. Just as she finished, karma came for her. Five security officers walked up to her—AR-15s at their sides—and asked her to confirm her name. When she did, they yanked her up and started dragging her away. My dad—an attorney—had a “holy cow” moment.
We went running after her. My dad did his lawyer thing; she didn’t get taken in for terroristic threats, and we somehow made our flight. We also managed to get that box of plates back home as well. I make fun of her every time we use them.
5. Getting The Vapors
I’m a cocktail waitress, and I’m also seven months pregnant. Now, obviously, I don’t drink while pregnant or drink on the job ever. A woman, the Karen, comes in with what I’m assuming was her husband and son and daughter and asks to be seated for lunch. We’re not really a restaurant, but we do have a small appetizer menu with sandwiches and wings and stuff.
I give them menus and Karen says, “But, wait, do you work here?” “Yep". “But you’re pregnant, you can’t work here if you’re pregnant". “I work here, I don’t drink here,” I say with a laugh, trying to keep the mood light. The woman looks me over and says, “Have you taken any prenatal courses? Do you really think that’s responsible to have your unborn baby in here?” This is where I made an error.
I get defensive about anyone asserting I’m a bad mother, obviously. So I said, “Well, you’ve brought your kids in here". “Yes, and what kind of example do you think you’re setting for them?” I’m still collecting my thoughts at this point when they grunt and wave me away. I figure I can kiss my tip goodbye but hopefully that’ll be the end of the discussion.
I see them flagging down the bartender after a few minutes and figure they’re ready, so I go over. Karen asks to speak to a manager. Now, they haven’t even gotten drinks yet, so nothing about my abilities could really be wrong yet. I just ask if there’s anything I can help them with, and her husband (Mr. Karen) says really sternly, “No, just a manager, didn’t you hear my wife?”
The place is too small for a manager, it’s just servers and bartenders and two co-owners. The one who’s working is in the back on a phone call and will be MAD if I go and bother her. I realize they’re probably still uncomfortable with my being pregnant so say, “Maybe Ella (The only other server) can help?” But Karen just gets up to physically look for the manager.
I admit defeat and go back to drag her off her call. The owner tried not to let on how mad she is about being disrupted and goes over with a big smile to ask if there’s anything she can help them with. Karen informs her, as though it’s urgent breaking news, “Your server is pregnant". The owner says she’s aware and asks if they’d prefer a different server.
Karen: No no no, she can’t be a drink girl if she’s pregnant. Owner: I assure you, none of our employees drink on the clock. Especially not our pregnant ones. If you’d prefer I can have Ella serve you...Mr. Karen: I don’t want my kids seeing this! Owner: Maybe I’m missing something. Seeing what, exactly? Mr. Karen (talking really slowly and condescendingly): A. pregnant. woman. around. all. this. booze.
Me: I don’t know what you’re insinuating, but I would never drink during pregnancy. Then the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard comes out. Karen: Look honey, didn’t you take a health class in junior high? With a drink right under you half the time, vapor is absorbed into your blood through the air and then that blood goes to the fetus and poisons it.
The owner and I exchange a look and realize we won’t get anywhere with her. Owner: So, we can have Ella serve you, or I’m afraid there’s not much else we can do. Mr. Karen: We’re not leaving until she’s placed on maternity leave. Or better yet, fired! Owner: We can’t help you. Mr. Karen: I’ll call the authorities! You’re an accomplice to child endangerment!
Owner: There is no child endangerment to speak of sir, please leave. Karen (getting crocodile teary): YOU MAY NOT THINK A FETUS IS A CHILD BUT I WAS TAUGHT TO BELIEVE LIFE BEGINS AT CONCEPTION AND I WILL STAND UP FOR ALL LIVING THINGS BIG AND SMALL BECAUSE THAT IS WHAT MY LORD AND SAVIOR WANTS ME TO DO! The entire time she’s delivering this tearful speech she’s looking around expecting others to, I don’t know, join in with her? Applaud?
Owner: You’re disturbing my customers and if you don’t leave you’re trespassing and I’ll have to escalate this, which I really don’t want to do. Karen: JESUS IS LOVE AND JESUS SAID THIS IS NOT OKAY. JUST BECAUSE YOU THINK IT’S OKAY TO HARM A CHILD IF IT’S SMALL ENOUGH—This is an Irish pub and the owners are devout Catholics, but she wasn’t having any of this. Owner: HEY. I don’t need anyone to tell me what Jesus said. I need you to please leave.
Mr. Karen: I’m calling the authorities. Owner: You do that. We just stop trying to service their table. As we all wait for the officers to arrive, Karen keeps trying to give her sermon, but there was a game on that people had come to watch and eventually everyone yelled at her until she piped down. Enter Officer 1 and Officer 2.
Officer 1: We received a call. Is there a Mr. Karen in here somewhere? Mr. Karen: Right here officers! Officer 1: You said you were witnessing child endangerment—are the parties involved still in the bar? They point me out. I pretend not to notice because I’m worried the officers will take them outside and I won’t be able to watch any more fireworks.
Officer 2: So what exactly was going on? Karen: That woman was drinking! She’s pregnant, you can plainly see she’s very pregnant. Before I can go over and tell them she’s lying about my drinking, the officers look at each other and look back at the Karen family. Officer 2: That’s not against the law. Karen: WHAT?!?!!!!!??! Mr. Karen: Look here—
Officer 1: It’s definitely not recommended, but it isn’t against the law. Now, do you know the woman, is she a friend of yours? Family? Karen: She works here. In a bar. And she’s pregnant! Mr. Karen: I want to see this place’s license revoked. Officer 2: So, listen, she isn’t doing anything wrong. What I can do is talk to her, but we can’t take any action beyond that. Is there anything else you observed that you’d like to report?
So the second officer comes over to me and takes me to a quiet spot while the first is getting their personal information and taking the rest of the statement. Karen is crying again and I assume bemoaning being the last bastion of good Christian morality in this bar. Officer 2 introduces himself and congratulates me on the pregnancy and says I probably overheard why they were called.
He starts to offer me some public resources for new mothers, parenting classes, etc. I didn’t want to interrupt him, so was waiting for the right moment to interject with my plea of innocence. That’s when other patrons come over, thinking I’m in trouble and start defending me. We have plenty of regulars who know me and they would not let this stand.
Some even complained to the officers that the owner had asked the Karen party to leave and they’d continued to make a scene. So both the officers go talk to the owner, who said she was just about to call them herself on account of the trespassing, but sirens outside are bad for business and she was hoping the Karens would eventually leave on their own.
The officers tell the Karen party they need to leave. Mr. Karen: This is a public place. I have every right to be here if I want! Officer 1: No sir, this is a private business, and the business owners have asked you to leave. It sounds like more than once, but at least once since we’ve been here. Karen: THIS IS A DISGRACE. THIS IS AN AFFRONT TO...TO...TO SCRIPTURE AND CHILD SAFETY AND—
Officer 2: I understand you’re upset. Let’s talk about it outside. (He places a hand on Mr. Karen and gives him a firm look.) This next part was said as Mr. Karen walks out backward so he can keep yelling at us, but bumping into things every step of the way. Mr. Karen: I’ll be contacting the authorities about your license. Bump I happen to be close personal friends with the mayor! Crash And you two, I want badge numbers. Don’t think we’re done here because we haven’t even bang started!
So the officers took them out and as it was told to me by a regular who left around the same time, walked the Karens to their car, which was improperly parked in a handicap space. For which they were ticketed. They did make a complaint to the liquor authority, claiming, among many things, that we served minors. We were investigated but obviously came up fine.
6. DIY Karen
When I worked at the Home Depot, a Karen told me that she didn't want any Black men to install her flooring. I was in charge of arranging her order, so I told her that we don't select which individuals exactly will install her floor and that she'll get who she gets. She proceeded to have a fit about it. She started yelling at me, asking me for my manager.
And I'm so glad she did because guess what: my manager's name was Dwayne and he was a real big Black dude. Turns out she didn't want to speak to the manager after all.
7. Tossed Out Of Target
When I had just graduated college, I did a stint at Starbucks as a manager. We made this woman's iced tea wrong. It was a silly mistake and it would have taken all of thirty seconds to remake it. Instead, she reacted in the most appalling way. She threw it back across the counter, turned to her daughter, and said in the nastiest, never-worked-a-day-in-her-life, soccer mom, "trophy" wife voice: "See, this is why we finish high school".
Being the manager, I refused her any further service. She thought she had me by the hair when she went to get the Target store manager. She didn’t know that the Starbucks I was working in was inside the Target I had previously worked in. A number of other customers backed up my story, and she was removed from the store altogether.
8. She Was An Endless Stream Of Problems
When I was working at an ice stand, I had a lady come to the window with her two children. It was busy, and the line was long. I took the order for her daughter, and then her son said he had to pee. So, she took her son to the side of our building and had him pee there even though there was a perfectly good tree about a few feet away...AND we had a bathroom that we allowed kids to use.
She was taking a long time, and the line was wrapping around the building. So, I took the next customer while she allowed her son to let loose all over our building. She then came back and stepped in front of the lady, saying she was ready. I asked her to give me a minute since I was almost finished with the customer that she had just stepped in front of. That's when she went into a deep red rage.
She started to yell really loud about how unprofessional I was and how I had terrible customer service. I then explained to her that while she had her son pee on the side of the building, I decided to try and get the next person out of the way. She went on to deny her son peeing on the side of the building and she said she would like to speak to my manager.
I gave her his number and wrote down my name for her to tell him, which angered her even more. She waited to get her stuff— screaming the whole time as I was making it—then huffed off. The people behind her each apologized for the way she acted, and they all told me I was doing a great job.
9. For Karen And Country
I joined the army right out of high school. During basic training, I volunteered for a unit known as The Old Guard, which is responsible for ceremonies in the DC area and funerals in Arlington National Cemetery, amongst other duties. It consists of units you may have heard of, such as the US Army Drill Team and the Sentinels of the Tomb of the Unknowns.
So it's the 4th of July in DC. Big celebration, all kinds of stuff going on. I'm sure you can picture it. Most of the celebration goes on in front of the Capitol on the National Mall. As part of the festivities, my unit, the Presidential Guns Salute Battery, fires the bass line for the performance of the 1812 overture. Only the more seasoned guys in the platoon get picked to do it, so the rest of us are given a cordoned-off area in the very front.
We bring some food, some chairs, our families, and we have a cookout during the day and watch the show when it starts. During the earlier parts of the day, it isn't too crowded, but as evening draws near it becomes packed, nearly shoulder-to-shoulder. Fortunately, as I mentioned before, we had our own area at the front roped off from the general public, giving us ample room to have our cookout.
Throughout the day, we would have people politely ask if they could join us, we said no but were always respectful. We weren't in uniform, but we had our unit T-shirts on so we were still representing the army. Enter Karen. It's midway through the afternoon, still a few hours before the show. We're enjoying the weather and the time off.
I happened to be near the edge of our area when I hear someone behind me. I turn around and there she is, pinched face and a haircut that says “I want to speak with your manager's manager". Karen: Excuse me young man, could you ask your father to take this rope down? This is supposed to be a public area for everyone and my kids can't see the Capitol.
Mind you, there are signs hanging on the rope every five feet explaining the purpose of the rope. Me: (with my best PR smile) I'm sorry ma'am, this area is reserved for members of The Old Guard and their families. If you'd like to come back a little closer to dusk, we'll be taking the rope down around then. Karen: The Old Guard? I've never heard of that before.
Me: (always happy to drop knowledge) Ma'am, We are the primary ceremonial unit for the US Army and escort to the President of the US of A. Karen: I don't see the president. Shouldn't you be escorting him or something then? rolls eyes Me: Uhh.... (I had no idea how to respond to that, fortunately, I was saved.) Platoon Sergeant: (Places hand on my shoulder) Good afternoon ma'am, I'm Sergeant First Class Guyincharge, what seems to be the problem?
As I knew this was my cue to get out, I went back to my chair and observed their interaction. Couldn't hear anything, but the interaction concluded with Karen walking away looking annoyed. Didn't think anything else of it…until about two hours later. We're cleaning up our trash, breaking down the chairs and tables and such. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Karen approaching again.
This time she has two Capitol officers in tow. My sergeant must have noticed too, as I heard him mutter "what in the heck?” under his breath as he walked to intercept the trio. Again, I didn't hear all of the conversation, but we all heard about it later. Sergeant: Officers, what seems to be the problem? Officers: (Obviously exasperated by the situation) Sergeant Guyincharge, we received a report that you and your group were making lewd gestures and comments towards this woman's family. Is there any truth to this?
Sergeant: Absolutely not. I’ve been supervising them all day, nothing even close to that has happened today. Offices: (nodding as though this was what they expected) We had assumed that, but we had to follow up. Sorry to bother you. Karen: You mean you’re going to just let them sit there and hog up all of the space!? I drove my kids nine hours to see this!!!!!
Officers: Ma'am, these men are here with the express permission of the District of Columbia. There are signs there (points to a sign not three feet away) that explicitly state that. Sergeant: (trying to diffuse the situation) Ma'am, we're cleaning up our area right now. As soon as we are done we will be removing the rope to let everyone in. If you can be patient and wait, we can get you and your family right up front here in about 20 minutes.
Karen proceeded to stare at them, much like a cow stares at an incoming train. Then she spun around and walked away without another word. We think it's all over, we go back to what we were doing. We were wrong. We're just finishing up, taking the ropes off of the pylons and stacking the pylons in the arms of another dude in the platoon.
Out of nowhere, here comes Karen, trailed by her four children and obviously stressed spouse. "It's about time! Get out of my way!" Karen all but screams as she goes barreling right through Private Anotherguy. Now, to be in The Old Guard, you have to be between 5' 10" and 6' 4" and maintain the army standard of physical fitness. To add to that, we are an infantry unit.
If you aren't aware, the infantry is generally the front-line combat, and we are trained for just that. So, suffice to say, none of us were small, nor weak. Karen was probably around 180ish. So when I say she barreled through this dude, I mean it. She put some force into it. Anotherguy goes sprawling to the ground, steel pylons fly in every direction.
A couple hit him in the face, and he chipped a tooth and split his eyebrow open. One pylon bounces off the ground and hits one of Karen's children in the leg. The kid, probably 12 or 13, starts wailing like he lost a limb. As we are helping Anotherguy to his feet, Karen is losing every last ounce of her mind. Red-faced, screaming about how she's going to sue us for assault, how we've ruined her family vacation blah blah blah......
At this point, the sergeant is done with her. If Karen thought she was being loud, she quickly learned there are few things louder than a ticked-off senior NCO. With a single word, he quieted everyone within 50 feet of us. Sergeant: STOP! (paused for dramatic effect) THAT IS ENOUGH. YOU HAVE BEEN HARASSING ME ALL AFTERNOON. WE HAVE TRIED TO BE NICE, WE HAVE TRIED TO BE RESPECTFUL. YOU HAVE BEEN NOTHING BUT RUDE. NOW YOU'VE INJURED ONE OF MY MEN. THIS. STOPS. NOW!
I think Karen might have had a small stroke right then. She stood, mouth agape, not able to utter a single word. And then, as if right on cue, here come those two Capitol officers. They hadn't been far away and had seen the entire incident. I didn't think Karen's eyes could get any wider, until the first officer pulled out a pair of cuffs and said, "Ma'am turn around and put your hands behind your back. You are under arrest for assault and harassment".
She tried every excuse she could think of, but the officers were having exactly none of it. They talked to Anotherguy, and he wanted to press charges, so they carted her off. I don't know what the father did with the kids, they disappeared when the officers took Karen. Come to find out after Anotherguy comes back from the court hearing that Karen had been carrying three bottles of pills that weren't hers, plus two credit cards that weren’t hers either.
No idea what kind of time she got, but it wasn't enough. After all was said and done, we watched the 1812 overture and laughed about Karen for weeks afterward. Anotherguy was fine, a chipped tooth and a little bit of bruising. Nothing major, fortunately.
10. Don’t Mind Me
When I was in college, a student came in and sat in their chair, leaning back, taking that standard “don't care” posture. Meanwhile, another woman in her mid-50s came in and sat next to him. No one took any notice at first because, again this was college, and everyone could attend at different times in their lives. But it got weird fast.
Usually attendance wasn’t taken, but it was the first day of a 101 class, so the professor wanted to make sure everyone who was supposed to be there was. The woman had a notebook out but wasn’t on the class roster, nor was she someone who was waitlisted. The professor asked her if she missed the waitlist announcement, to which she replied, "No, Don't mind me".
The professor frowned and asked, "Why not? What are you doing here"? Her answer blew our minds. The woman replied, "Taking notes for my son. Like I said, don't mind me". The professor stood there stunned. He stated in a confused voice, "Lady, he is in college". The woman nodded and replied, "Yes, but notes are hard for him".
The professor asked, "Does he have an IEP? If so, we have a program for that". The woman said, “No. Like I said, Don’t mind me". The professor told her, "I do mind. You have to pay to be in this class". The woman persisted, "I’m not learning anything. Just taking notes". The professor was left dumbfounded by that. He pointed her to the exit at that point.
He just said, "No. You’re gonna leave the classroom because your son isn’t 12 anymore and can darn well take his own notes. You didn't pay for classes, so you're not allowed to be here. Goodbye"! The woman still had the nerve to say, "Well! I will complain to the head of your department". But the professor still had one more trick up his sleeve.
He told her in no uncertain terms, "I am the head; now leave".
11. A Recipe For Disaster
I worked part-time as a busboy when I was in high school. We had this family that would come in—a man, his wife, and their two small kids. They seemed like the most ordinary family, but they were actually the destroyers of tables and they always left a disaster. There would be fries everywhere and stuff all over the floor. I sat and watched as one of the kids put the salt and pepper shakers into a glass of milk.
I was already annoyed at that point, but when the dad called me over, I almost lost it. He asked me: "Hey, can junior have a new milk? He had a little accident". They would scream the entire time with zero reaction from the parents. It was chaos for the entire hour they were there, every time. I had to clean up after them over a dozen times before the hostess asked them not to return. They threw a fit but at least they didn’t come back.
12. Karen Versus Carl Jr.
My mom is a Karen. She thinks the world is supposed to cater to her and that everyone else is wrong. Once, we went to Carl's Jr. and she ordered four burgers for the four of us. What she did next made me so angry—she pulled one burger out of the bag while the guy was getting our drinks and hid it. She complained that he forgot a burger, pulling out the remaining three in the bag one by one and counting them in front of him.
He keep swearing up and down that he put them all in the bag, but she threatened him, saying, "If you don't get me another burger, I will call your manager". I was stunned speechless, but it happened so fast. She got a free burger and laughed as we drove off. I just stared at her and she opened it up to eat it on the drive home. She ate her actual burger like the fifth one never existed.
I can't even explain how she is when she's in the hospital. She treats it like a luxury stay in a hotel.
13. Let The Music Play
This just happened to me and I’m both shocked and laughing my butt off. I was on a bus on my way into college, listening to a punk band I’ve recently got heavily into, a band from Brixen in the German-speaking region of South Tyrol in Italy called Frei. Wild. The bus is fairly packed, so I’m right at the front of the bus where you’d park a stroller or a wheelchair.
A woman with a stroller gets onto the bus and sits in the only free seat, next to me. She looks down at my phone (why? I still can’t work it out) and sees that I’m listening to a song called “Sieger Stehen Da Auf, Wo Verlier Liegen Bleiben” (roughly translated, rather aptly, to “Winners Stand Where Losers Fall”). She then yanks one of my earphones out. “You live in Scotland, stop listening to your awful Polish music. God, all you Polaks are all the same, refusing to be decent citizens and speak English".
Now, I’m Scottish. Born and bred. Apart from a week in Amsterdam, two weeks in Morocco, three weeks in the States, and a week in France, I’ve stayed very much in the UK my entire life. Never been to Poland, or Germany for that matter. I eventually had enough of her, so I tried to put her in her place: “This is German Music. Also, I was born here. To Scottish parents".
Karen tried to make her rebuttal, but I got there first. “Also, how does me listening to some punk rock that happens to be in German effect you? I have my headphones, you can’t hear it". Karen’s eyes lit up as if she’d won the Karen lottery. “Why are you listening to that sinful, demonic music in public? You’re gonna scare my kid".
I look in the stroller. “Firstly, your child is sound asleep. Secondly, I have my headphones in, you can’t hear it, I can’t hear it. Screw off and let me listen to my music in peace. Maybe Polish people aren’t the problem in this country. Maybe it’s stuck-up judgmental witches like you". As I called her out on this, she whacked the stop button, and yeeted herself and the stroller right off the bus at the next stop. Thank God.
14. The Joys Of Motherhood
My boyfriend's cousin has four children. Each of her kids is the personification of the word bratty. The cousin refuses to discipline them and constantly makes excuses for their behavior. She's also very judgemental of our decision to not have children. She has often made some snide comments towards me, implying that I'm a selfish jerk who is depriving my boyfriend of the "joys of raising children".
For these reasons and for her generally entitled behavior, my boyfriend had cut ties with her. However, when he and I visited his parental home three days ago for his parents’ anniversary celebration, we ran into her again. My boyfriend's dad had urged him to use this occasion to mend bridges with the cousin. So we both tried to make nice and engaged in small talk with her. I’ve never regretted an action more.
During our conversation, my boyfriend mentioned that we were leaving for Melbourne for vacation in a few days. At this, the cousin's eyes lit up. "Oh that sounds like so much fun," she said, "My husband and I haven't gone anywhere since our honeymoon". She whined some more about how hard it is for them with four kids, if only they could afford such luxuries, etc.
I could tell where this was going almost immediately. My boyfriend probably felt sorry for her and, being the kind and generous soul that he is, he offered to buy them a weekend in a resort in Mt. Abu, a hill station in the Indian state of Rajasthan. Cousin (face scrunched up): "That's nice, but why can't you just take us to Melbourne with you?"
BF (getting a bit annoyed, but still patient): Well, we want to spend some time alone together. Plus we'll be meeting some close friends there. Besides, Mt. Abu is a beautiful place. Your kids will love it. Cousin (in the annoying “Karen” tone): I still don't see why you can't take us to Australia. You're being so selfish, going on this great trip and sticking your family with a cheap weekend getaway.
BF's Mom: He's making a very generous offer. Either take it or leave it. Cousin (wearing the expression that morons wear when they think they've had a bright idea): Oh I know! Why don't my husband and I go to Mt. Abu and you can take our kids to Melbourne? Me: What??? Cousin: It's a great idea. The kids can have fun in Melbourne with you two and my hubby and I can enjoy a peaceful weekend. This way, the kids can actually spend some time with their uncle. You never make time for them!
BF: I'm offering for the last time. It's either the weekend in Mt. Abu or nothing at all. And why the heck would we ruin our vacation taking care of your kids? Cousin: How can you say that? My kids are so well-behaved. You'll have so much fun spending time with them. Besides, my husband and I could really use some quiet time together. You two don't have any responsibilities. You have no idea how hard it is to raise four kids. You can afford this trip. I don't see why you won't share with family......
BF: One more word and you're losing my Mt. Abu offer. On hearing this, the cousin finally shut up. We all had dinner together and she was mercifully quiet. If only her kids had followed her example. You'd think this would be the end of it, but NO! We had seriously underestimated her dedication to her Karenness. This morning, the cousin showed up at my apartment with the kids in tow.
I was shocked to see her, of course, and asked if something was wrong. She smiled and said, "I'm just here to drop the kids off. You're leaving tonight right?" After taking a second to recover, I asked, "Did you fall and hit your head on something? We told you we weren't taking your kids with us. What part of that did you not understand?"
She then tried to convince me that my boyfriend had called her later on and had agreed to take her kids. I knew this was a lie and called it as such. The cousin became enraged and asked if I was going to break her kids' hearts. I called my boyfriend, and after telling him what was going on I turned on the speaker. My boyfriend proceeded to chew her out brutally, telling her he would no longer pay for their weekend getaway and that this is exactly the kind of behavior that had made him cut ties with her.
She tried to get a word in but he wouldn't let her. The cousin took her kids and stormed off. My boyfriend and I are having a laugh over this and are still wondering what made her think that this plan would ever work.
15. This Karen Comes With Baggage
I dated a male Karen for eight years. He was a semi-successful business owner who was twice my age, and I was young and dumb—for a lack of better words. The gist of our relationship was him trying to take over every part of my life. For instance, he would order for me at restaurants and would dissuade me if I wanted to try something new.
If I had a problem with something, it would be immediately brushed off; but if he had a problem, then he had to talk to a manager. Not knowing any better, I just thought he was very particular and even started copying some of his tendencies: like speaking up when I felt I wasn’t getting the right service when I was out on my own.
I realized who he really was when we were flying back from Vegas. I noticed something so peculiar—our luggage was heavier than when we flew in. Obviously, we’d bought extra things which made up for the weight difference. So he demanded an explanation from the check-in clerk as to why it weighed more if it was the same luggage. I innocently answered that it must have been the extra shoes and clothes. He was quiet and paid up.
Later, he told me not to do that again. He said he knew the reason why the luggage was heavier and that he was just trying to get away with not paying. At that moment, a bulb went off in my head. This man who’d spent $1,500 on a private dancer for his friend was making an already stressful job more stressful for the clerk in order to avoid paying $60!
We broke up soon after and I checked myself on the Karen tendencies he’d rubbed off on me.
16. Living Your Best Life
I lived in Melbourne, Australia for about a year. While there, I met a gorgeous gay couple, Brian and Derek (names changed). They were both bisexual, and they lived in the same building as me on the floor directly above mine. I soon entered into an intimate relationship with both of them. We would have threesomes, and sometimes more.
Besides the awesome bedroom stuff, I also became really good friends with them and we're still in touch. It was tons of fun for all involved. Among my neighbors was a middle-aged couple with two children. They lived right across the hallway from me and were quick to judge us after seeing Brian and Derek exiting my apartment early in the morning on more than one occasion.
The woman, Karen, asked me in the elevator what I was doing with "those two gays". I politely told her it was none of her business. When she kept on pestering me, I told her "If you must know, I'm friends with benefits with them, now leave me alone". I still remember the look of shock on her face. I don't think she expected me to reply so brazenly.
When I told Brian and Derek about this, they shared their own experience in dealing with them. This couple had tried to talk to the property manager about "gays moving into a building with families and children". They were told to screw off but any time either or both of these guys were in the elevator with them or ran into them in the parking lot, the husband (Let's call him Todd) would stand between them and his kids while giving Brian and/or Derek angry looks.
They must've been trying to prevent their kids from catching "the gay". HA. In the weeks that followed, the entitled couple continued to give me the stink eye any time they saw me. I just smiled back at them sweetly, which annoyed them even more. On one occasion, their teenage daughter said "good morning" to me and tried to make small talk, before her mother dragged her away by the arm while berating her for talking to "that woman".
Interestingly, their kids seemed very well behaved and nice and I truly felt sorry for them. My next-door neighbors (another couple with kids with whom I got along very well) later told me that Karen had tried to get them to file a noise complaint against me. According to Karen’s logic, since I shared a wall with that family, they could probably hear all the "ungodly" noises coming from my apartment and they should complain in order to protect their children.
The nice couple told them they would do no such thing as I had never bothered them and they had never heard any such noises coming out of my apartment. One night, Brian, Derek, and I decided to have a foursome that would involve the three of us and Brian and Derek's friend Dean. The next morning, Dean asked if he could come back to my place with me.
As it was a Sunday morning and Dean was hotter than Hades, I agreed. As he and I were walking down the hallway to my place, Karen was just getting out of hers. She saw Dean and I smiling and talking with his arm around my waist. She approached me, asking angrily if I was “selling my body". I told her she was insane and asked her to kindly screw off.
Later that day, I received a terrifying call from the property manager. She wanted to let me know that Karen and Todd had complained that I was "a prostit*te" and that it was dangerous for their children to be in the same building as me. They told her in great detail about how I was bringing home different men. The property manager had gotten to know Brian and Derek quite well and had an inkling that I was “friends” with them.
So she contacted them and they told her all about Karen’s crazy behavior and accusations. They said that the man they had seen me with was a mutual friend. The property manager dissuaded the family from filing any sort of false complaint against me as it could cause a world of trouble for them. I thanked that kind lady and later had a good chuckle over it all with Brian and Derek.
The blatant harassment from Karen and Todd had stopped, but of course, the hateful looks continued. On one occasion, when we were in the elevator together, Karen made a pathetic attempt at shaming me by condescendingly asking if I was going to have any men over that night. What she didn't realize is that shame about my promiscuity is something I'm entirely incapable of feeling.
I proceeded to tell her in great detail about all the acts I was going to engage in that evening. I mean, she's the one who asked, right? After this fun little interaction, she and her husband avoided me completely. Good times.
17. A Big Splash
I worked at a McDonald's in my sophomore year of high school. Some lady went through the drive-thru at about 1 AM and someone accidentally gave her Diet Coke instead of regular. In her rage, she threw the drink back through the window—but that wasn’t what it made it memorable. It was where the drink landed. The drink splashed right into the hot frying oil and it began to sizzle and splatter—and then, it splashed all over one of our co-workers.
The lady drove away pretty fast, but the manager got her license plate number off the cameras. She was sued for that incident.
18. Queen Of The Karens
Long ago, I worked for one of those bulk warehouse club stores. My trade was simple: I was a wrangler of the silver buffalo, and dutifully retrieve the ol' shopping carts I did. The job in and of itself wasn't the worst I'd ever had; I got plenty of exercise, got to be outside, and generally didn't have to interact with the “members” (calling them customers was taboo) for the most part.
For the most part. The thing about this job is that the company I worked for had a reputation for being cheap. Thusly, more often than not, I was on my own out in the parking lot. "Big whoop," you might say. "You gathered carts? You should see how hard MY job is!" Yeah, well... Shut up. This is my story, jerk-o. I digress.
The reason that being alone sucked is that this store didn't have just one kind of cart. Heck, they didn't even just have TWO kinds of carts. You had your classic garden variety cart, the kiddie-cart with the plastic facade to make it resemble a car, the electric scooters (which weren't supposed to leave the store, but did so with alarming frequency), and finally, the bulky, hard-to-control flatbeds.
On top of that, whenever someone needed help loading their haul into their minivans, I was the guy they called. You know, because the greeters, cashiers, and managers were all busy. As you might expect, one man cannot be in multiple places at once, and as a result, on some of our busier days, it became incredibly difficult to keep enough carts in the vestibule. Our story begins on one of these days...
So there I was, chugging along like a good worker drone, struggling to keep up with the sheer volume of people coming in to buy cheap bulk goods. Sure enough, I get a call on the radio: Manager - "[sktchh] We need you to help some members load their purchases. [sktchh]" Me - "Uh, I'd love to, but I'm barely able to keep up out here as is..."
Manager - "[sktchh] Just do it. You can afford to stop gathering carts for two minutes. [sktchh]" *Ron Howard voice* - "He couldn't". However, I didn't want to push my luck, so I complied. After spending 20 minutes loading people's purchases because when one person needs it, suddenly they ALL need it, I came back to find my vestibule a near-ghost town, save for a single line of carts that was half-gone, and...the Karen.
I won't waste time describing this specimen. She was the prototype. You know what she looked like. There she stood, menacing, tapping her foot with such speed that it could make any metal drummer green with envy. You could collect the contempt in her gaze in a jar. Karen - "Where are the big flat ones?" I blanked for a moment. Me - "I'm sorry?"
Karen - "Ugh. Mexicans..." For the record, I'm very much white. Karen - "WHERE. ARE. THE. FLAT ONES". Me - "Oh, you mean the flatbeds. I'm sorry, I was just helping some other members load their merchandise and haven't had a chance to—" Karen - "OH MY GOD, I don't care about your excuses, you have ONE JOB, and a TRAINED. MONKEY. Could do it!"
I just want this lady out of my face, so I don't fight it. Me - "Sorry ma'am. I'll grab one from the parking lot for you..." Karen - "You'd better..." So I go back out to the lot and find a whole line of flatbeds sticking out of a corral blocking several parking spaces. I push them all into the vestibule where she waits, huffing about how I'm wasting her valuable time.
I separate one from the rest and bring it to her. Me - "I'm terribly sorry about the wait, ma'am". She leers at me with utter malice. Karen - "Hmmph. Unbelievable..." And with that, she dismisses herself into the store, where she will be someone else's problem. I shake my head and return to doing what I'm paid to do. I wish I’d never seen her again…but I did.
About 15 minutes later, I'm returning a line of carts when I see her pushing her flatbed to her Miata and jawing about “stupid people” (most certainly referring to me) on her cell phone. You know what she had bought? What she had insisted on having a flatbed for? A cake. This wasn't even like, a big cake. It was one of those little circular numbers.
Anyways, I witness as she continues to yammer on about how I nearly ruined—RUINED I TELL YOU—her precious baby's birthday party, when the most glorious thing happened. Still clutching her phone with those jai-alai scoop claws of hers, she attempts to pick up the cake with one hand, the plastic topper pops off, and she spills the cake all over her undoubtedly expensive designer outfit.
Seething with white-hot rage, she locks eyes with me. Karen - "YOU! GET ME ANOTHER CAKE! NOW!" Me - "Terribly sorry ma'am. I've got one job, and these carts won't gather themselves". I walked away, grin plastered on my face as her shrieks faded into the distance behind me. I've had my share of nasty customer interactions before, but this one...Really took the cake.
19. A Wild Ride
When I was 16, I worked at the amusement park in my city. It wasn't a big one, but it wasn't small either. Most of our rides were aimed towards elementary school-aged children, though we had a few for the older kids as well. Anyways, I was a rides operator, and that day, I was assigned to a ride designed for older kids. We had to measure the kids, and they couldn't go on if they were under the height requirements no matter what, even if they had a parent with them.
It was a ride that only had a bar that went across your stomach, so someone too small could easily fall off. Entitled Mother and her entitled brat are in line, and I can already tell the kid is gonna be too short to ride without even having to measure him. He's pretty far back, so I know it's gonna be one or two runs before he makes it on.
So after I'm done loading, I tell the mom that her kid is too short for the ride and that they should go try the smaller version of it on the other side of the park. She looks at me with the dirtiest stare ever and just says: “We're gonna wait here". Now, I have to run my ride because I need to meet certain times, so I don't argue. Time goes by and she's finally at the start of the line.
I measure her kid, and of course he's like 6 inches shorter than the height requirements. Me: I'm sorry ma'am, but your child is too short to ride this ride. I would recommend going over to the smaller version near the entrance of the park, though. He: No, it's fine, I'm with him. I'll hold him. She tries to shove me out of the way, but I'm standing my ground.
Me: I'm really sorry ma'am, but we don't allow people under the height limit to ride this ride. The safeties we have on it just won't hold someone too small, and your kid could fall off. She then asks to speak to my manager. I get asked that quite a lot by entitled parents, so I give them a call and tell her to wait on the side while I load my ride.
She gets very offended, saying that she shouldn't have to wait longer for her kid to ride this ride because I couldn't do my job, and at this point I just kind of ignore her and move on. Ride runs, my team lead gets there and talks with her. He tells her that he's really sorry but that I'm right, her child can't ride this ride. Now at this point, the brat is throwing a tantrum.
I mean, he's rolling on the concrete like a piece of bacon in a frying pan. I'm trying my hardest not to laugh at this point. Anyways, my lead apologizes, offers her a "skip the line" ticket for the ride he's allowed to go on at the entrance, and leaves. The mom is trying to calm down the kid and starts talking to him. He gets up, all smiling and happy, and stands next to the gates, watching me.
Now I'm not thinking too much of this at this point, so I start loading my ride again, which has a significantly less busy line and I have a couple of empty seats on it. As I'm doing my security checks and getting ready to run it, the mom taps me on the shoulder and thanks me for my help, which I found extremely odd. I turn around to tell her that it's really no problem, and she starts apologizing and telling me that she shouldn't have acted the way she did and blah blah blah.
I'm completely stunned, not really sure how to react, but I tell her it's no problem and to enjoy the rest of her day. I look back at my ride, and realize the brat isn't standing next to the fence anymore. I'm starting to get weird vibes. I look around for him and he's not anywhere to be seen. I look at the mom again, who has her phone out with her camera pointing at the ride, and that's when I knew.
I take my keys out of the ride and start walking towards it. It's kind of a "swing" type of thing so I couldn't see the back from where I was standing, but I knew darn well the brat had snuck on. The mom starts panicking, asking me what I'm doing and why I'm not running the ride. I completely ignore her and walk to the back of the ride, and lo and behold, the kid is sitting there.
He almost pees himself when he sees me walking towards him. He didn't have the bar properly locked AT ALL and would've flown right out as soon as I started the ride. Now I'm mad, and I mean mad. I mean, I could've gone behind bars for manslaughter right then and there. I just look at him and very sternly tell him to get off my ride.
He tells me he can't and he needs help, which is fair. I don't even know how he managed to get on in the first place, but I grab him and put him down, and he starts sprinting towards his mom, crying. As he's running, he trips and falls down on his face. When he gets up, his nose is all bloody and his knees are skinned, which is when I knew I was completely and utterly screwed.
The mom starts screaming like a banshee at the sight. As I'm running towards the kid to make sure he's okay and to help him up, she runs towards me, slaps me hard across the face, and starts yelling for security. I'm absolutely and completely stunned at this point. Some security guards must've heard her screaming at the top of her lungs because they come running.
The exchange goes something like this. Guard: What's going on here? Mom: This girl attacked my son! She threw him off the ride into the pavement! Me: Excuse me??? Brat: It's true!! She punched me too. Guard: Do you want us to call the authorities? Mom: Yes! You need to arrest her!! She's mentally unstable. I'm just dumbfounded at this point.
My lead gets to the ride and asks what the heck is going on, and I tell him everything that happened in between sobs. There's one thing the mom forgot to take into account, though. There were like 15 people on the ride who saw everything. So they tell the officers and the security guards and my lead and everyone else what happened.
The mom quickly realized her error, as she just started running with her kid in tow as soon as she saw people asking the other guests questions. They caught her pretty quickly, and I pressed assault charges against her. Needless to say, I handed in my resignation that same day.
20. Early Morning Karen
I once worked at Dunkin Donuts for a few months. Once, we had a lovely woman pull up at the drive-thru 20 minutes before it opened. Naturally, my co-worker and I ignored her while we hurried to set up because without the headset on, we had no idea she was even there. And there was no way I was putting that thing on a minute earlier than I had to.
Eventually, she pulled up to the window with an evil-looking face. We gestured to tell her "Sorry, we're not open yet," but apparently, she took it personally. She then started banging on the glass. When we opened the window to explain that we couldn't serve her yet, she began cursing and squeezed her fat self out of the car.
She leaned into the window spewing off insults. We just stared in awe. I think we told her the authorities were coming or something and she left.
21. The Queen’s English
This story took place five months ago. So my stepmom is British. Welsh, to be exact. For those who don't know, Wales is the little hump west of England and north of Cornwall. It's a beautiful place known for sheep. My stepmom is ethnically Welsh, but raised in England. Despite this, my Nain and Taid (Welsh for grandma and grandpa) insisted on her and her brother learning Welsh to preserve their heritage.
The Welsh are a proud people, and so they wanted to ensure their children were as immersed as they could be. So she grew up bilingual, went to university, got a job working for a certain tech giant, and moved to the US to help train their staff. A few years later, she met my dad and joined the family. At the time I was still getting over my mom, so her presence was less than welcome.
Despite this, my stepmom never pushed me or tried to buy her way in. She gave me the room I needed to grieve, and, when I was ready, showered me with enough affection to make up for the lost time. She has my eternal love and respect for it and has become my second mother. Now, we live in a large town in the mid-west, being west of the seaboard but east of the Mississippi, so while most people are open to outsiders, there's the usual few who just want to ruin everything.
Around Christmas time, I was visiting home from college with my girlfriend, Charlie, enjoying some quality girls' time with my stepmom. We were in the mall, searching for some place that sold plastic modeling glue for my dad (he's really into Warhammer). During this, my stepmom is on the phone with her brother, who still lives in the UK, catching up and sharing some laughs.
They were speaking Welsh to each other, which happened to offend a woman who has since earned the title of Karen. We were standing in front of the mall map, trying to find the hobby store when I heard a loud scoff from behind us. I turned to see a woman dressed in a rather nice-looking business suit corralling her kids away like they'd just encountered a streaker.
Now I was ready to let it go, but Charlie can get very defensive of people she likes, so she ended up calling her out. "Something offend you, ma'am?" The woman seemed to ponder her next move before responding with that oh so stupid phrase. "You're in America! When you're here, you speak English! Not Muslim! My kids don't need to hear that!"
Now, I've met some pretty stupid people in my life. Even dated one. But never, ever have I heard of someone confusing Welsh for Arabic (which is what I assumed she meant). They're two very different languages from two very different cultures. The only similarity between them is how little I understand them. However, for someone to be so offended by someone speaking another language, they probably also didn't immerse themselves too much in other cultures.
To her, the world probably began in New York and ended in Los Angeles. It was at this point that my stepmom hung up. "Now, I know that Americans get a bad rap and all," she said in an obvious British accent. "But it doesn't help when you actively conform to the stereotype". "Oh my God," Karen said with righteous indignation. "Your accent is awful! Where did you even learn to speak English?"
My stepmom held the most deadpan expression she could: "England". I swear I could smell the smoke coming from the flaming mess inside Karen's skull. She looked at Charlie and I (a pair of shockingly Caucasian college brats) and then my stepmom (our even paler chaperone), took a moment to process what she was doing, and then walked away, dragging a group of embarrassed looking tweens with her.
I have to give her credit. At least she knew when to quit. My stepmom chuckled, muttered an offensive-sounding Welsh phrase, and then helped us scan the map for the hobby shop. The rest of the day went well, and we had a funny story to tell my dad when we got back. To all the people out there who get offended when someone speaks another language: get over yourselves.
The world doesn't revolve around you. To all my bilingual friends out there who speak their native tongues: good for you. It's important to keep your culture alive. And to Karen: next time you try to accost someone for speaking something other than English, at least get the right continent.
22. A Giggling Fit
It was getting near closing time and I was cleaning the self-checkout machines while my manager was topping up the coins and receipt paper. This woman, just shy of 50, came up to the checkout and just stood there with her mostly empty cart. I was waiting to see if she would walk up to the actual register for service, but no; she just stood there.
I finally asked her, "Do you need help?" She replied, "No," and kept standing there. Then, she started giggling loudly to herself in a way that made other people around her uncomfortable. I just kept cleaning and my manager continued filling the machines, all of which were devoid of customers. Finally, the woman spoke loudly, to no one in particular, saying the rudest thing ever: “Do you want to work or not?”
I let out a long breath, then dropped my cloth and spray bottle down. Suddenly, my manager stepped in and replied loudly, "She does have work! She's cleaning right now". Then she motioned for me to keep cleaning. Well, the woman giggled again, really loudly and snottily this time, and said, "I want a checkout". My manager replied, "You had your chance. She asked you if you wanted help. You said no. And now, you're going to have to check yourself out".
The lady started freaking out and demanded to see the manager. My manager destroyed her with one sentence: "You're looking at her". The woman sheepishly checked her own items out while we both watched her. And then my manager giggled loudly, just like the woman had done. It was glorious.
23. Nope, Nope, And Nope
My partner and I purchased the house next door to my best friend. I had lived with him for close to a decade when his kids were babies, so the children viewed my house as an extension of theirs, and were in and out all day, every day. I have a more flexible schedule than he and his wife, so I have them in the mornings, after school, and on days off of school.
I had a pool in my yard, and because my friend's kids were still little, I installed a retractable cover and made sure it was locked so they couldn't open it. My friend's yard had one of those wood fort/climbing wall/swing set deals and a large sandbox. Throughout the year, we spent most evenings outside, grilling, drinking, and watching the kids play/swim/whatever.
One summer day, I came home from work a little earlier than normal, and started to prep for dinner. I heard a knock at my back door, which was odd, since my buddy's kids never knocked. I went to see who it was and discovered a mom and two kids who looked to be maybe 5-7 years old. As I opened the door, she informed me that her kids needed to use the bathroom and that I needed to come out and get the cover off my pool.
I was confused and asked her to repeat herself, and she said that her kids needed to pee and that they were hot and bored with playing in the sandbox, so I needed to open up my pool. I asked her why the heck she was in my friend's yard and what made her think her kids were welcome to swim in my pool, or use my bathroom for that matter.
She got really witchy and told me that she had moved into the house behind us and that she had watched my buddy's kids come over all the time and watched as I opened the pool for them. She insisted that since I was willing to open my pool for the kids next door, I should also open it for the children who lived behind me. I tried explaining the relationship between my best friend's family and mine.
She claimed it didn't matter that I had known them since birth and pretty much had helped raise them, I just needed to get to know her kids too and it would be OK. I told her no and closed the door on her. She spent a while knocking and fussing at me through the window, and then had her kids pee in a planter on the side of the patio.
When I still didn't react, she took her kids back into my friend's yard to play on the swings. I texted him to let him know what was going on, right at the moment he was letting his 300+ pounds worth of Newfie dogs out into the yard without noticing the unwelcome visitors. The mom starts shrieking and climbs up into the fort, leaving both kids on the swings.
She starts demanding that we put the dogs inside and how dare my friend let his dogs out into his own yard when her kids are clearly playing there. He tells her to get the heck out and calls the authorities. When the officers arrived, she put on the whole waterworks about how her kids are just looking for friends, and my buddy's kids are somehow mistreating her kids, even though they'd never met.
She said that he invited her over just to let his dogs attack her children, blah blah blah. They eventually move her back onto her own property, then come back later to tell us they warned her about coming back. She lived in that house for almost a year before she and her husband divorced. But even then, she still managed to be a nightmare neighbor.
During that year, I had to replace the lock over the pool cover controls three times, have a fencing company remove a gate at the back of my property that was meant to let the lawnmower through, and eventually payed a security company to come to check on the yard any time we were going to be away for more than a few hours.
We found her and her kids in our yards repeatedly, but she'd leave when we got home. What finally resolved the issue was my partner catching her in the pool. She told him she knew the man that owned the house and that he had told her it was OK to swim. He told her he was married to the man that owned the pool and that it's not OK to swim.
She apparently had a bad reaction to realizing she was immersing her sons in gay water. We didn't see her again after that.
24. A Watery Chuckle
I work in a large airport at a small convenience store on one of the busiest concourses. I hear it all, especially about our prices. Although we try to keep our margins as low as possible, we still have to pay our rent as a business, and it's about $14k a month. One day, I had an older woman come in and set down an expensive brand of water that was priced around $5.15 after tax.
I knew that she was going to say something about it, so I prepared myself mentally. Indeed, she did say something, and it threw me for a loop. She asked me, “Wanna know something funny?” I said that I did. She said, “This same water in another airport is $2.50". I stared blankly at her for a solid 10 seconds. Finally, I said, “I think I missed the joke".
She then proceeded to insult me, but she still purchased the water before leaving in a huff. Best day I've had in a while.
25. Meet Mega Karen
Today I crossed paths with the MegaKaren and, although she seriously disrupted my day, I'm kind of tickled to tell this story. I work in an office building with about three dozen companies operating on the premises, and because of the odd layout of the building we have six different parking lots. I prefer using the "hidden" lot that requires you to drive through one of the indoor lots to reach it.
Between being hard to find and all of the spots being marked "Compact," this place is usually less crowded than some of the lots closer to the road, not to mention that the door into the building from that lot is right next to my office, so it's convenient in every way for me personally. Today, it was raining cats and dogs when I arrived at the office.
For some reason, my normal lot was unusually full, however, someone pulled out of a prime space just as I arrived, giving me a much shorter walk through the wetness to reach the door. I exchange polite nods with the guy leaving, then pull into the space behind him. As I'm getting out of my car and grabbing my laptop bag out of the back, I hear some distant car horn honking.
I think nothing of it since it's practically on the other side of the lot. When I turn around to head inside, though, this entitled mother rolls up in an oversized SUV and slides to a stop on the wet pavement between me and the building, splashing me with a bit of puddle in the process. Her: "That spot wasn't for you!" Me: "Excuse me?" Her: "That parking spot! I was waiting for it and you took it from me!"
Me (now irritated): "Where were you waiting for it? The highway off-ramp?" Her: "NO! I've been looking for a parking spot for 20 minutes, and when one comes open it's for the first person waiting!" At this point, I look up and take stock of the whole row of empty spaces she had ignored to come over and harass me about taking "her" space.
I also consider the fact that the claim she's making—that whoever was waiting first gets the first available space—is not now, nor has it ever been, a real point of etiquette. Me: (gesturing): "There are plenty over there that were open before I even got here. Take your pick". Her: "NO! I need THAT spot! You need to move, NOW!" Me: "Why on earth do you have to have THIS spot?"
Her (gesturing to the back seat): "So my baby doesn't get wet walking from all the way over there!" I look in the back seat, and the kid looking back at me was easily 10-12 years old. Also, "over there" couldn't have been more than 50 feet further to walk in the rain. Kid: "'Sup?" Me: "That's not a baby. He'll be fine. And anyway, your car wouldn't fit in this COMPACT spot".
I move and point so she can read the six-inch tall letters marking the spot as smaller than average. Me: "But if you go around that side of the building, there's another lot that isn't compact spaces". Her: "Whatever, are you gonna move or not? Your fat butt needs the extra exercise anyway". Me: (already cranky because I hadn't eaten yet, now angry that this orangutan in lipstick is talking to me this way): "Well I'm definitely not moving for such a colossal witch. Have fun walking in the rain, I hope you get struck by lightning".
I quickly walked away while this charming example of humanity hurled insults after me. Now, admittedly, about 15 minutes later once I was settled in at my desk, I started feeling really bad that I'd told this woman I hope she gets struck by lightning, even if there was no lightning going on in that rainstorm. I continued to feel bad for all of five minutes when the sound of a car alarm caused me to go to the window and look out. I couldn’t believe my eyes.
This woman had parked somewhere, gotten out of the car, and was now keying the heck out of my driver's side door while her kid recorded it on his phone. I took a quick picture of them in the act on my own phone and immediately called building security to tell them what was going on. So guess who got apprehended for destruction of property and assault?
Oh, right, she also spit on and scratched the security guard who went to confront her, so assault. And everything that went down from beginning to end was practically right under a security camera, so it got a good look at her, her kid, and her car (including her license plate) so no way she's getting away with it. AND since the insult she etched into my car door is homophobic she may ALSO get charged for that.
26. Like Money In Your Pocket
I used to work for Kohls. While there, I had one customer come to the service desk with her receipt, saying that the cashier did not take off her 30% coupon. Usually, this is an easy enough fix, but when I looked at her receipt, the total was $0.00. She had already used Kohl's cash to cover the whole thing. I told her the computer system takes the dollar off coupons first.
It is only afterward that it will then take the percentage off. This is how it works, irrespective of the order in which you scan them. Since her Kohl's cash took care of the total, I told her that the system couldn't take 30% off of $0.00. Apparently, she didn't like that...not one bit. She then started yelling at me and telling me that I was stealing money from her.
I explained to her that Kohl's cash is just a coupon we give to customers and not actual money. She then told me that she wouldn't be shopping at Kohl's again, and she threw her 30% coupon at me before leaving.
27. Mommy’s Little Monster
I was playing on a Minecraft server with five friends at the time this happened. This new kid joined our game and our Skype call. He kept breaking our builds and demanding we give him stuff. We originally decided to ban him, but we wanted to have some fun, so we kept just wasting him. The Skype call was basically six guys laughing and a little kid screaming, calling us hackers.
We were talking on Skype when his mother called. "LET MY SON PLAY ON THE SERVER, YOU UNGRATEFUL JERKS". "No," we all said at the same time. "MY HUSBAND IS A LAWYER AND HE WILL SUE YOU AND I WILL CALL THE AUTHORITIES FOR HARASSMENT!" "Shut up, lady!" "DON'T YOU TALK TO ME LIKE THAT! MY SON DESERVES ALL YOUR ITEMS MORE THAN ALL OF YOU COMBINED!"
“Screw off, woman!" "YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO SWEAR! ONLY ADULTS ARE ALLOWED TO USE THAT KIND OF LANGUAGE!" One of us makes a Christian Minecraft server meme and she gets really angry. "HOW DARE YOU INSULT MY RELIGION! ALRIGHT. WHERE DO YOU LIVE?" We start making up addresses. "THAT'S IT! I'M LEAVING!" "About time". She left and blocked us. We still joke about that incident.
28. Listening In
I have been working throughout COVID in a supermarket. A few months ago, I found out that I have permanent hearing damage and hearing loss from an illness I had from January to February. I am currently in the early stages of an audiology referral and my employer has been really helpful. They are making sure that I can still work in the same roles as before with the same level of confidence.
One day, a customer arrived at the till who, for some reason, misinterpreted one of the offers that we run. Essentially, she wanted the discount but did not want one of the items required for the discount to go through. She did not realize that I have to scan everything and, therefore, charge her for the extra item in question so that she could get the discount.
I processed the transaction in this way but not without her raising her voice and attempting to grab the item that she didn't want out of my hands. At that point, I was quite confused. I could hear parts of this customer's sentences, but she was speaking very quickly and I did not understand why she was getting so incredibly agitated over some frozen peas. Around this time, she also started to badmouth all of my colleagues and myself, saying that we "shouldn't work here if we don't know what offers are on in the store".
She also said that the staff members "know nothing," implying that I was the one who should lose my job because of her adamant misreading of an offer. Through this, I finally understood why exactly she was so angry. So, I asked one of my colleagues to come to the tills in order to assist the customer.
She did not want to engage with me, nor was she capable of having a civilized conversation at that point. My colleague arrived and I began to serve the other customers waiting while the woman went on to my colleague about how I was "incompetent" and "useless". But that's not the worst thing she said—she repeatedly stated that I "wasn't listening" to her, even though I had given her my full attention.
The repeated emphasis this woman put on me not "listening" really hit a nerve. The last thing that I wanted after going through the wringer with various illnesses for the past seven months was to be told that I was losing my hearing. It was permanent, and it was not something that could be fixed in the same way as the previous illnesses.
I have to work a lot harder on the tills due to the aforementioned hearing loss and as much as I try to not care and ignore it, this was just too much for me to handle at the moment. I started to cry in the middle of a transaction while this woman thoroughly berated me for something that I had absolutely no control over.
Somehow, I managed to pass it off as hay fever which I don't think anyone believed. Eventually, it clicked into place for the customer that she was incorrect, and she very quickly went on her way after realizing that she had just completely humiliated herself in a store full of people. There was no apology made to any of my colleagues, or to myself and the other customers in the store.
I had been debating whether or not I needed to get a lanyard clearly stating I have a hearing loss, but it is still very early into the investigation process and I didn't want to buy one before I had any thorough tests done on my ears. But this was the event that cemented that I absolutely needed to get one as soon as possible.
Regardless of my hearing loss, that kind of behavior is absolutely unacceptable and a completely different kind of demeaning. It was the most insulting reaction I have ever seen, and over a bag of frozen peas, no less. If she didn't want them, we had a perfectly acceptable food bank to which they could be donated.
29. Age Before Beauty
I was traveling on a train yesterday afternoon, back from seeing some friends. I was basically traveling the entire length of the route with a journey of around nine hours going over 450 miles north, so a long time. I had a reserved seat for the whole journey, with the seat next to me switching from being reserved for some of the journey for an hour or two, then being vacant.
At around hour 6 of my journey, the train was becoming very busy with families going home from day trips out. The next stop saw the person sitting next to me depart, and a woman—who was looking and acting as if the group of scraggy students (like me!) and families with little ones were far beneath her—got on with a woman who looked my age.
They were both looking around for a seat. The older woman saw the space next to me and made a beeline for it, with the other woman in tow. This is the conversation that followed: Older Woman: Hi, I think you’re in my daughter’s seat. Me: Oh, really? I’m pretty sure this is the seat I reserved, doesn’t it say so on the display up top?
Older Woman: No, the screen’s gone off, but these are the seats for me and my daughter, now move. At this, I got out of my seat to look at the screen, which still said it was reserved and quickly sat back down. Me: Nope, it still says it’s my seat. The seat next to me seems free for a while if one of you wants to sit down. Daughter: Why can’t you just move? We’re probably traveling further than you anyway.
Me: Sorry, but I’m really not going to move. Older Woman: [Raising her voice to attract the attention of others] I can’t believe you won’t have the dignity to let me sit next to my child! She can’t just go and sit on her own! Me [to the daughter]: How old are you? Daughter: 23, so probably older than you, you really should do what I say.
I’m 21 and look it. Me: Seriously? I won’t move from my reserved seat, your “child” is 23 and doesn’t need to sit with you! [I was feeling petty and so rose my voice to mimic the mom when saying this] Older Woman: That’s it, we’re getting the staff, I will not be spoken to like this by a child! With that, they both left the carriage, and I didn’t hear anything from any member of staff or anyone else, though a lovely little old lady who was sitting across from me said that she would probably have sworn like a sailor at them if they’d spoken to her like that when they’d gone out of earshot!
The icing on the cake was when the train stopped around half an hour later, I saw them both getting off and walking up the platform—it took everything in me not to give them a little wave as they skulked past!
30. A Short Wick
I work at a candle store and this happened yesterday. An older woman came in—she was probably in her 80's but still seemed to have her wits about her. Anyway, she was going on and on about needing a small gift for a guy who did some work in the building she lived in. I told her that we carried a line of skincare and bath products for men.
She scoffed and says that would be weird. So, I said, "How about a candle?" This was because, you know, I work at a candle store. Her response made me curl a fist. She basically said, in an angry voice, "I can't give him a candle. He's not gay!" I was trying very hard to bite my tongue and remind her that we have tons of male customers and even my straight boyfriend likes our candles.
She then had the nerve to say, "That's good for him, but I cannot give the man a candle because he's not gay!" At that point, I was over it and I walked away. My manager then stepped in because she has a lot more patience for ignorance than I do. After she left and we vented about her, my manager told me that the woman ended up buying a notebook that says, "Slay the day".
31. It’s The Little Things
So today, my husband and I were feeling bored and adventurous and decided to make a pilgrimage to a posh "Coffee Bar" in our city. We've been meaning to go for months but never got around to it. We pull in the lot and it's packed. 10:45 am on a Sunday, so we expected it. As I'm getting out of the car, the mombie next to me is struggling to get three kids out of their seats while her husband (?) stood by the front of the car watching, not helping.
I hop out and excuse myself and walk into the café with my own husband. Huge line. Two more people come in after us, then mombie and her horde. She immediately starts complaining about the line. She talks loudly to her husband at first, but when he's clearly ignoring her, she decides to just complain to thin air. "Why is this line always so long? God, why don't they have more staff? Why does every person have to come at the same time? UGH!"
She eventually asked the couple in front of her if she can go ahead because her kids are really, really hungry. These saints begrudgingly say sure, so now this delightful family is directly behind my husband and me. She then says to me, "Excuse me miss? May we have the spot before you in line? My children have been waiting a long time and are very hungry".
With the nicest voice I could find, I said, "I'm sorry ma'am, we've been waiting a while too and are also hungry. The line is moving faster now at least!" I gave her a smile even though she was glaring at me. I turn back around only to hear her mutter, "Wow what a witch. Can you believe some people? How rude". It took all my effort to not react.
My husband is a conflict avoider, I am not. But I respect his wishes enough to not cause a scene in public when I'm with him. Eventually, she starts telling her husband how they're always out of the Mediterranean Spinach Breakfast sandwich she wants and she better get it this time or she's gonna so mad. This is when I concoct a seriously evil plan.
I check my watch; it's 10:55. A minute or two later, it's our turn. Husband orders his Soy Chai and I sloooowly order my vanilla nitro cold brew...with cream....no, not cream, sorry, with soy. And an extra pump of vanilla. Barista rings us up as I check my watch. It's 10:58. I ask to add a Mediterranean Spinach Breakfast Sandwich to the order.
She says sure, no problem. Gives us the total. I'm digging in my purse for my wallet, darn, just can't seem to find it. More digging. Oh! There it is, finally. Hand her the card, wait for the receipt, and slowly sign. Pack purse back up, say thank you, and walk away. Husband says, "You're hungry? We ate breakfast an hour ago". Me: "No, I'm not hungry. Just had to do this".
Him: "Do what?" I nod towards mombie. Husband looks over. She orders her coffee and some juice things for the kids, doesn't even ask if her husband wants anything. Then it happened. "And one Mediterranean Spinach Breakfast Sandwich". Barista: "Oh I'm sorry ma'am, we stopped serving breakfast at 11. We have all our lunch options today though".
Mombie looks at her watch and yells "WHAT? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!? IT'S 11:02!" Barista: "I'm sorry ma'am, company policy is to stop breakfast at 11. Is there anything else I can get you?" Mombie: "GET ME YOUR MANAGER! THIS IS RIDICULOUS. YOU JUST SOLD ONE A MOMENT AGO! THIS IS ABSURD!" The manager came over, explained the situation, apologized, but refused to give that witch a sandwich, bless her heart.
Mombie retracts her entire order and stomps out, red-faced and yelling all the way to her car. My husband was trying to hold back his laughter. Our order came up. We grabbed it and went back to the car. I'm unwrapping the sandwich and take a bite exactly as I'm trying to scoot around her trying to strap her kids in again. I say, "Oh excuse me ma'am, just gonna sneak by ya real quick!"
She’s glaring at me, the worst stare I've ever gotten. I get in the car and unwind the windows ever so slightly. It's hot today, right? I slowly unwrap the rest of the sandwich and take a few more bites, passing it to husband and back while she's screaming and struggling with her kids, getting no help from Daddy. As soon as she pulled away, we burst into laughter. Today was a good day.
32. Sole Cost
I no longer work retail, but I used to work at an extremely discounted store, something like Marshalls, TJ Maxx, etc. This incident actually happened a few nights before my last day. We were about to close, and this lady came up to my register to check out. She handed me a pair of Michael Kors baby shoes and asked me how much they are.
I told her the price—$27—and she flipped! She retorted that the price could not be correct. I calmly said, “They are $27, ma’am. Did you still want them?” She replied, “I want them but not for that price". She clearly wanted a discount. I had to clarify: “I’m sorry, ma’am, we don’t do discounts. We’re already an extremely discounted store".
She said in disbelief, “$27 for baby shoes?! That’s crazy". So, seeing her reluctance to pay that much, I assumed that she did not want to buy them anymore. Thus, I offered to put them back for her. She stopped me angrily, saying, “Uh hello? I said that I want them!” I acceded to that but firmly maintained my stance by saying, “OK, ma’am. They’re still going to be $27 though".
She refused to believe me and asked me to check again. So, I flipped the computer screen around and showed her the price. At that moment, she did not know what to do because she was wrong, so she snapped at me to get my manager. The said manager came, confirmed the price, then left.
I thought that was the end of it, but no. Karen then said, “I just don’t understand why they are so much?” I tried to make her understand by saying, “Well, these are Michael Kors, one of the more expensive brands we carry here. If you were to buy these anywhere else then they’d be at least $100. You’re actually getting a pretty good deal".
She still refused to budge and said, “I just don’t believe you. That’s not the real price. And you should know, I work for the Attorney General, and it would be a shame if you lost your job because you’re making up prices". Still trying to maintain my cool, I replied, “There’s no benefit for me to lie to you”. She finally became quiet.
What was she thinking? Consider this, lady. I get paid $9 an hour to scan items. What on earth makes you think I make commission? If you want Michael Kors goods then you have to pay Michael Kors prices, even though this was already a bargain.
33. Sweet And Soured
I am 17 and live in the UK, and this happened around December of last year in a Lidl, which is a grocery store. My mom asked me to go grocery shopping because she was quite busy with something and I agreed to go. I spent around 10 minutes at the Lidl looking for things on the shopping list. While there, I decided to get a treat for myself because why not.
I got some Fin Carré chocolate and made my way to the till. I was standing in line while using my phone just minding my business until this overly loud parent with her very hyperactive kid, who looked around eight, came behind me in the line. Mother: "You wouldn't mind letting us go in front of you, would you?" I looked down on her cart, which seemed to be a lot more full than mine.
Still, I decided I'm not in a rush, and I replied "sure" and subtly smiled. She thanked me and went on to go in front of me. My impression of this woman seemed normal…until this happened. The kid said as he was pointing to my cart: "Mom, look it's that chocolate that you promised me to buy next time we go shopping". Mom: "Oh yes darling I just remembered".
She then looked up to me and said, "May I grab the chocolate bar? The little one's been eager to get it". Now, this chocolate is somewhat far from the tills in this location, so getting a new chocolate bar for myself would've been a chore. I replied: "I'm sorry I don't think I can give you the chocolate, it's quite far from the tills".
Her smile quickly turned into a stare and she said in a loud voice: "Right, I don't care how far this chocolate is from here, someone like you is more than capable of getting a new bar, so stop making George cross!" I replied: "I don't care how capable I am, I'm not going anywhere and this chocolate is staying in the cart". Now, there was a lot going through my head at this point, but I remember how the kid was reaching inside my cart, trying to grab the chocolate.
I quickly grabbed it myself and held it in my hand. Kid: "Mom, the guy took the chocolate!" Mom: "Right, I've had enough". This woman literally reached to my hand to grab the chocolate, but I moved in time and decided to go directly to the cashier and ask him to call a manager. The cashier seemed to have witnessed everything and informed the manager about what happened.
After no more than two minutes of me awkwardly standing, the manager arrives. She walks up to the mother and quietly asks her to leave. However, the mother kept trying to incriminate me somehow until she finally paid for her groceries and left. Me, the cashier, and the manager all had a laugh about it after she left. Now that I think about it, that scene wasn't worth a chocolate bar, but oh well.
34. On The Edge
A lady demanded that I call her a manager today. She wanted to complain about how some items did not have a price on them while others did. She started interrogating me about pricing protocol, but I was on SCO duty today. Though, since I'd never seen her in the store before, I lied and said that I had nothing to do with stocking.
The manager arrived and Queen Karen launched into a full-fledged rant. Then, while she was at the counter complaining, she added a very hand-flailing, gestured complaint that the counter edges were too rough and sharp. She went as far as to say she was lucky that she did not injure herself, otherwise she would have called the health board. I wipe that counter down probably 200 times every day.
I assure you, there is nothing sharp about it because I would be among the first to raise a concern about it if there was. The employees where I work are very aware of how something small like a sharp edge on a cart can end up with a potential lawsuit in this crazy economic and opportunistic climate in which we live right now.
My manager handled it well, but the other associates and I couldn't stop laughing about it all shift. Their loud proclamations about how such-and-such—mostly random things like the color scheme, etc.—could have been fatal for us were just absurd.
35. Too Hot To Handle
So I was standing in line at the checkout at my local supermarket. It was a SUPER heatwave around this time, just scorching outside. I think in total I had about 10 items, some frozen goods, drinks, and snacks. While in line, I usually tend to take out one of the buds of my earphones in case someone calls out to me. At this time, the woman at the cash register was taking care of the payment of one client.
There was one person in front of me, and then suddenly she appeared—the entitled mother. Now honestly, she didn't look it. She didn't even give off a mean vibe or anything. Even the way she started talking to me was overall nice and polite, AT FIRST. "Excuse me, do you mind if I skip ahead? I'm in a hurry”. Now in general if somebody politely asks me this and I don't have any urgent business of my own, I usually don't mind.
This time, however, I didn't have that many groceries, so her delay would be at most a few minutes, while she was pushing a fully loaded shopping cart in front of her. If I would have let her skip, I'd probably still be in the store for another 10-20 minutes. So I politely decline and tell her I will hurry as much as I can. Of course, this was a great offense; I hadn’t given this woman what she was entitled to. She blew up instantly.
Yelling and screaming at me that she was in a hurry and (not kidding here) had to be home in time for her shows. This is important a bit later. Now while this woman was going off, the person at the cash register went into ignore mode and just started scanning my groceries, which I loaded into a bag while she was going on about how I was garbage and they should me ban me from the store.
This should have been the end of it, but then she said something that made me almost want to throttle her. While I was walking away, just about to put the earbud back in, she yells, "If you pass by my car, tell my son he's the reason he has to wait another half an hour for me". Now I'm not an extremely smart person, but in this moment my brain made some connections quickly.
What I realized was this: One, it was very hot outside. Two, this woman had been in the store for a while, judging by the number of her groceries. Three, the entire parking lot of this store had almost no shade. Four, it was about 2 pm, so the sun was just over its peak. I rush outside and start running past cars, scanning them for kids inside.
Thankfully, one of the first cars I pass has a small child laying in the back seat. This kid is as pale as a ghost, sweating like crazy, and it looked like he was only half-conscious. I run back inside, and to my utter astonishment, this witch is having a conversation with the cashier while she's checking out her groceries. I grab her by the shoulders, spin her around, and yell almost straight to her face that her kid is literally dying in the car.
At first, she looked at me in complete confusion, probably never having been spoken to like that before in her life. Then the realization of what I told her sunk in and she rushed outside. While she went outside, a man tapped me on the shoulder and asked what had happened. I explained the situation but left out some details, just saying I saw the kid in the car and knew that this woman was probably the owner.
He went outside and when I came outside, the mother suddenly rushed me and got in my face, saying I was the reason she was in the store for so long and her son's current condition was my fault. Before I can even respond, the man that approached me earlier speaks up. Turns out, this man was an off-duty officer and had been in the store for a while.
As a result, he knew that the actual delay I “caused” could have not caused this. He also said he had already called an ambulance for the kid and the authorities for her. I don't know what happened to the woman, but she completely crashed. She just sat down on the pavement and started shaking her head, not saying much except the occasional cry or "not my fault".
As for the ending: everything turned out okay for most parties. I stayed a while to give a statement and my contact information in case it went to court. The kid was okay (afterward) and since his mom got detained, they called his dad or another male family member (I didn't ask) to accompany him to the hospital. As for the mother, I'm assuming she is going to have to stand trial for child endangerment.
36. Peeping Polly
I usually sleep in my underwear during summer since it gets hot in my house, and I also have curtains in my windows. So one day I woke up and made myself a bowl of cereal since I was home alone. I walk past my window to the kitchen when I hear a knock on the door. I'm still only in my underwear, so I hurry and get some shorts on. I open the door and see this entitled mother and her daughter.
Mother: HOW DARE YOU WALK AROUND IN YOUR UNDERWEAR Me: Uh….I’m in my own house and I had the window closed with the curtain down? Mother: MY DAUGHTER GOT CURIOUS AND PEEKED THROUGH YOUR WINDOW AND SAW YOU IN YOUR UNDERWEAR. Me (stunned into silence for a bit): Well, it's my house, and I can be as [undressed] as I want to be. And then I shut the door in their faces.
37. Make Way
So, I work at a grocery store chain and Tuesdays are what we refer to as "Specials Day". Basically, it's my job to change out last week's special with the current week's special. It is a long and painful project that I volunteered for when I got promoted because I like doing projects that other people do not.
That day, I was doing my thing in the specials aisle. I started getting gradually more and more annoyed since the whole process would be three times faster if they just let me do it when the store was closed, but, for some baffling reason, they wanted the customers to interact with me as I was occupied with 10 pallets of random things.
Near the end of my ninth pallet, I had myself basically pinned into a corner of the aisle. This was a strong nonverbal language that should have signaled to the customers, "Hey, maybe don't walk this way. I'll have to step around my pallet, move my pallet jack, and reset myself if you do". But lo and behold, trouble was headed my way—a lady came walking down the aisle, approaching me at the end.
I am a chill guy, but I don't really talk much to the customers because my store is in an upper-class area and the wealthy folks don't like getting spoken to by some sweaty dude in a uniform. So, when she kept walking towards me, I realized that she was going to try and walk around my pallet or, God forbid, walk on it.
I quickly moved my jack and the pallet and looked up at the ceiling, questioning God for creating oblivious customers. Apparently, that look at the ceiling really truly infuriated her. At first, as she walked through the suddenly clear path, she apologized half-heartedly in that way only some types of customers can pull off.
But her apology read more like "Oh, I am sorry wage person. I sure hope I didn't inconvenience you with my presence". I nodded my head at her "apology" and turned back to move my jack and pallet back to where I was working. Apparently, not only did she expect me to move, but she also really expected me to graciously tell her it was no problem that she made me move my entire working station so she could save 15 steps.
Between not accepting her apology and looking at the ceiling for about three milliseconds, she decided right then and there that I was a menace and needed a talking to. She started with the basic criticism of me being a retail grunt who didn't have a big fake grin on my face the entire day. She topped it off with the classic line that always gets my blood boiling: “I do not think you should be working here if that is going to be your attitude".
She said that while looking at me like I was an animal in a zoo exhibit. I did not reply and just kept working. “What's the worst that can happen?” I thought. I cannot please everyone. Then she got in line. Now, the line to the checkout is situated about 10 feet from where I was working. At that point, the villain, in her mind, had her walkway obstructed.
She went out of her way to loudly criticize me and complain about how I should not be allowed to work at the store. Now, I will be honest with you, I should have just let her have her moment. If I had let her just screech and complain, it probably would have ended there. Maybe a phone call or strongly worded email to corporate. No biggie. I should have just smiled and kept working.
But there was a part of me that needed her to know that yelling at customers about how terrible I am is not how we did things at our store. So, I told her, calm as I could, that she needed to stop making a scene. And when I say something snapped in this woman, it was like someone hit a light switch. Immediately, her phone was recording me and everything got a lot more dangerous.
She was asking leading questions like, "Did you just tell me I can't talk to other customers?" and "Do you think you have the right to break my first amendment?" and "Who's the manager here?" Now, there are two things you can do when someone gets their phones out and records you. You can walk away, potentially get followed, and then you can ask them to stop recording.
Or you can be a fool like me and ask them to stop recording you right away. The latter method, naturally, led to her screaming even louder and accusing me of being a terrible person. She randomly started threatening me, saying that she could have me fired whenever she wanted. At that point, I was just trying to get her to leave.
She had made the scene worse by recording and trying to be the next viral "look at how bad I was treated" internet star, and it was clear that she just wanted to capture my angry reaction on film. I am glad to report that I did not get angry with her. I did not raise my voice at all. I just stood there and let her scream at me. As she finally finished paying for her groceries, I asked her again to please leave if she was going to continue making a scene.
This led to her sitting behind the cashiers and between the doors and waiting for me to walk away so that she could leave. I informed her that I needed to see her leave. She said that she was not leaving until I was out of her sight. I stood my ground and told her that she needed to leave or I would be forced to call the authorities.
Oh, God. She had the wrong reaction to that statement. Most of the time, if someone says, "Hey, this might need to become an official matter," the natural human reaction is to reevaluate what they are doing and decide if they want to continue. For reasons only God knows, this customer's reaction was "Good, call them. I want them here".
Here's the thing. I was not ever going to call them. It was a bottomless threat. What was I going to say to them? "There is a lady screaming at me and recording me?" Worst case scenario, this woman makes the whole situation into some kind of bigger issue and I end up on the news. So, my bluff having been called, I walked into the office and called my direct manager.
I told her what had happened and she basically told me to get back out there and deescalate the situation. I went back to the registers and I actually decided that the best course of action was to tuck tail and just apologize. So, I did. I said to her, "I'm really sorry you had a bad experience today. I hope you can come back and shop here. I understand what went wrong and I will gladly give you corporate's information". And then I told her to have a good day, indicating the door as I said that.
She sort of accepted my apology. Of course, she still went on about how I was terrible and how I should not work there, but at least she calmed down a little...until she mentioned she was an "investigator". Not seeing a uniform or a badge, I asked her what I thought to be a natural and reasonable question.
I asked, "An investigator for who?" Her exact reply was, "Do not play stupid. You know what kind of investigator". Then she went on to say that she was going to call corporate, let them know that I was only harassing her because she was an immigrant (which was ironic since I am an immigrant too) and that I should expect not to have a job in the next 24 hours.
I just sat there and took it. There was nothing else I could do, really. Sometimes you just have to let them screech so they will leave. As she finally turned to leave, she noticed that I was watching her. So, she came back and said that I could not watch her leave because I was "going to attack" her outside.
I clammed up even more at that comment. As a final shot, she told me that she had "the means to retaliate" in her car and that she'd "gladly use it" if I come outside. She finally left and I called my boss, breaking down in tears of pure frustration, telling her how the de-escalation went. My boss assured me that she was just a crazy lady and that she, my boss, would have my back if this turned into a bigger deal.
38. An Expensive Mistake
I own a Jeep that’s fully built, has a lift kit, the whole shebang. One day I'm coming home from work. It's a summer day so the roof is off and I'm having some open-top fun. I stop at a red light and suddenly screeeeech BANG! I drive forward slightly and go back to assess the damage, and lo and behold it's a Mercedes C class, a new one at that.
It was completely destroyed from the front, and my beautiful Jeep had no damage apart from a few scratches. I went to check on the passenger of the Mercedes and got her out of the car. Under a minute after she's out of the car, she starts screaming about how I wrecked HER car. I told her calmly that she was the one who rammed into me.
I don’t think she understood how my hitting her would be impossible. In any case, I offer to share our insurance details because I knew that Mercedes damage doesn't come cheap, but she said she didn't have insurance. Instead, she insisted that I pay her 10k cash. How she got this number? I don't know. I said that was just plain wrong as first, she hit me, and second, it's her fault for not having insurance.
She then went on a ramble on how her kids needed the money and now her kids will have to starve because she will have to pay to fix her car and how it will all be my fault when they are on the street tomorrow…blah blah blah. Yeah, on the street with a Mercedes. She then said she would call the authorities if I didn’t pay her. This was still incredibly stupid, so I still refused.
So then she called the authorities..............yeah. Officers came, assessed the damage, and asked us what happened. She said and I quote, "He backed into me at full speed on a red light". Then they asked me what happened and I told them, and it became a he said, she said situation. Luckily, a shopkeeper was there and saw the whole thing and even captured it on a surveillance camera.
Needless to say, I came out on top. The officers got her for reckless driving and driving without insurance. She then started yelling at them about how they would just let me get away. They explained that I did nothing wrong and that they now had video evidence of that fact. Eventually, they let me go from the scene and I got in my Jeep and left.
39. Selective Vision
Today, I had two unrelated customers really get under my skin. Most of the time, I shrug off mean customers. I let them complain and then reply with "Sorry, company policy" or some other non-response to shut them up. But not today. And the first one was a doozy. This customer was an older lady who had bought four packages of hot dogs.
We currently have a sale for hot dogs: buy two and they are 99 cents each while their normal price is $2.99 each. The limit is one, so it's a pretty good deal; you save $4 overall. However, this lady was angry that only two of her hot dogs had gone for the sale price. I was called up and asked to fix it. The lady claimed that there was no limit mentioned on the sale sign.
So, I got out a sales flier, and before I had even opened it, she claimed that she doesn't read the fliers. That made me instantly angry. I set up a refund and went to get the on-shelf sale tag. And wouldn't you know it, in big bold capital letters the tag read: "Limit offer one per customer". I grabbed the sign and started to go up front to show the customer.
She saw me coming and immediately took off because the cashier had run the refund before I had a chance to get the tag. It irks me that customers can read the sale sign, but selectively ignore parts of it.
40. The Turban Towel Heist
This happened about five years ago when I was working as a newly qualified social worker. It had been a rough morning and long story short, I had saliva and vomit on me. As pretty standard practice, I kept a spare set of court clothes in my car so I had something to change into, but I felt pretty disgusting and wanted a shower. So I took an early lunch and went to my gym nearby the office to shower and change.
I showered, came out and put my hair up into a towel turban, and walked toward the lockers. The changing area was empty except for one kid, a boy about eight or nine. A bit weird for him to be alone, but I assumed his mom must’ve been in the only occupied stall so I didn’t think too much of it. I smiled to acknowledge him and got to my locker to grab my things to change into.
At this point, the boy looked at me, pointed at my towel turban, and said: “What’s that?” Me: Oh it’s a towel turban, pretty neat huh? It stays up better than a regular towel. Boy: Cool. And he started to reach for my head. Me: Excuse me, what are you doing? Boy: I just want to see it. Me: Err, no I’m using it, sorry. At this point in my life, I’m pretty used to kids being a bit inappropriate, and it’s my job to make sure they understand, but I wasn’t expecting it here.
He looked a bit angry but went back to his (mom’s?) phone. I get dressed quickly and get my things to go over to the mirror and take the turban off to hairdryer my hair. I’m flipping my hair around to get it dried and I notice that this kid comes up to the mirror, then leaves again. I think nothing of it, and finish drying my hair, turn the hairdryer off, reach for my turban...and it isn’t there.
I know what he’s done, and I whip around and look at him. He’s turning a shade of red but staring fixedly on his phone so as to ignore me. I’m trying to remain calm, but Christ I’ve been spat at, vomited on, and now someone has taken my towel turban?! I walk back over and do my best “I’ve had enough of this” voice and say “Please return the turban. Now".
He keeps ignoring me, so I repeat, “Please return the turban. Now". He’s gone a huge shade of red, refuses to look at me, and mumbles something like “I didn’t take it". I’ve had it at this point, so go over to the only occupied stall and knock on the door “Excuse me, is this your son out here?” The entitled mother opens the door and looks at me, thoroughly annoyed.
Her: What? Me: Is this your son? He has taken my towel turban, I have asked for it back, but he is not returning it. Please ask him to hand it back, and I’ll not inform the gym staff. Her: What the heck is a towel turban? I start to explain, but the boy says, “It’s a hair towel that stays up better than a normal towel!” We both look at him, and the mom says: Ok... so what do you want?
Me: I want my towel turban back please. Her: Well, he wouldn’t just take something, you obviously just lost it. You shouldn’t go around accusing people because you lose things! Me: (getting annoyed) Well, he will have no problem then emptying his bag. If he has it, he can just hand it back and if I’m mistaken, I will apologize. The mom looks at the kid, and it’s obvious to anyone that he’s lying.
She just says: Don’t be stupid, I’m not letting you rummage through his things like he’s some kind of thief! Look at you, you are harassing a little boy in a changing room! I inhale to try and stop my eyes from doing a 360-degree roll. Me: I’m not asking to touch anything. I’m asking for you to go through his bag for my turban. That is all. If you are not willing, I will go to the staff and ask them to sort this out.
I know it’s just a freaking towel turban, but theft is theft, and it’s pink and cute, so I’m not letting anyone have it. Her: So you’re threatening me now?! I know a circular argument when I hear one, so I go to the door, lean out and call for someone to come and sort it out. Enter gym trainer dude. Trainer: What’s going on? He looks between the three of us and the kid has gone back to staring a hole through the phone and the mother positions herself between the trainer and the kid.
Her: This crazy witch is harassing my son and trying to go through his bag! She needs throwing out! She... Me: That isn’t what happened. Her son has taken my towel turban, and I would like it returned. I just keep looking at this kid, and the trainer says: Ok, so what happened? Did you take the towel?
The kid mumbles something about how I must’ve lost it and the mother jumps in and says: See? He didn’t take it, he’s so traumatized he can barely say anything! She then bends down to him and hugs him saying, “It’ll be alright” and she “Won’t let me get away with this” verrrrrrry dramatically. I look at the trainer and explain the whole event.
He says: Ok, so, why don’t we just check his bag? The kid starts dramatically wailing and the mother starts ranting about how this is harassment. The trainer looks uncomfortable and says, “That’s literally the only way I think I can solve this". The mother then stands up and tries to push past me, but I’m not moving and the room is small, so she fails.
She starts swearing and thrusts the kid's backpack at the trainer. Her: Fine! Check it! He hasn’t taken it, and when you don’t find it, I want her thrown out! The kid wails. The trainer obviously finds the pink, wet turban towel in the bag. He picks it up and kind of just looks at it. The kid wails even more and tries to grab it, but the trainer holds it out of his reach.
Trainer: Right, so...so...this is yours? Me: yes, Thank you. I stuff the coveted turban towel into my bag and get out my car keys and ID lanyard. As I put the lanyard over my head, something practically audibly clicked in the mother’s head: That’s a social worker ID. She yanks the kid’s arm, snatches the bag from the trainer, and I move to let her pass.
The trainer looks super confused and I explain that she must’ve just been embarrassed that her son took my turban. But I knew she was panicking because she realized what my job was and that her son was out of school, taking pink, wet turban towels.
41. Needing An Explanation
I had never ever encountered anyone really going off on me at work...Until yesterday. This encounter at my workplace—a burger place—involved a rude customer named Darren, his young daughter, my coworker named Karen, my manager named Bernard, and me.
At my workplace, we organize orders numerically. Once your order is finished, we call out the number and the customer comes to pick up their order at a hand-out area. Now, I am currently training for a new role, so I was close to the handout table, but not working it. I noticed a man, whom I came to know as Darren, standing in front of the table with a receipt in his hand and a burger in the other.
Obviously, I knew he had a complaint. I just didn't expect that it would go like this. I asked him if something was wrong with his order. He said that he had gotten the wrong burger. He was actually calm at this point and he sounded only a slight bit irritated, but there was nothing alarming. I apologized and asked what kind of burger he was missing.
That's when Karen, who was taking orders next to us, jumped in and said, "Oh, I think his daughter grabbed the wrong order. His order is in the back". I later told her that it was not necessary to tell the customers their mistakes in that manner because either way, we were going to fix it for them. It was faster to just fix it rather than play the blame game.
Plus, no one was going to blame her and go on some witch hunt. I just wanted to do my job. At the time, I just said that the food in the back was already cold, so I just needed to know which burger he needed". Instead of answering me, Darren said, "Wait. My daughter grabbed the wrong food though?" Karen said that was what she thought had happened.
So, Darren replied, "Well, can you tell her that? Because I do not want to start a fight if I tell her". At that point, Karen and I looked at each other confused and uncomfortable. He then waved his daughter over. They were a tall duo, but I guessed that she was around 12. I tried to avoid the situation and reiterated, “Really, I can just get the correct burger for you. It's not a big deal at all".
Darren insisted that she needed to “learn this". I then said, "OK. Well, I did not hand out the food, so I cannot say if she grabbed the wrong order. Karen can help with that". Karen quickly washed her hands of the situation by saying, "I can't. I am in the middle of taking orders". That annoyed me and I thought, “Why were you listening to us in the first place then? Why put in your 2 cents when I was already fixing it and we had no issues?”
But my concern, at that point, was Darren, who suddenly really wanted me to do it. His tone made the situation really uncomfortable. Even his daughter started to look extremely uncomfortable. As he started getting irate, more condescending, and loud, I started to just look for a way out. He continued to insist that he wanted to talk to me and know what had happened.
I, once again, expressed my helplessness. "Yes, sir. But unfortunately, I do not know what happened. I was not here handing out the food". He kept cutting me off, so I finally said, "I am going to get my manager for you because I cannot help you any more with this". As I turned to step away, he started screaming at the top of his lungs.
He shouted, "No, don't walk away from me! Ma'am, I do not want your manager! I am not trying to create a scene here!" Everyone was staring as he was going off and I yelled out Bernard's name. Bernard came over and that is when Darren went back to his calm voice. He told Bernard that he just wanted to know what happened with his order.
I was still standing there and Bernard said, "He wants to talk to you". Darren had a condescending voice when he was talking to me. He gave a half-truth and then asked, "Is that not what happened?" So, I stood quietly, and after he asked again, I said, "Well, I mean, my manager is here. So, yes, I am agreeing that that is what happened".
I also refused to look at him because when I get angry, I cry. I was trying so hard not to let the tears out. Also, because he was bending down to my level, I wanted to punch him. Darren started saying stuff like, "Will you look at me? Why does it feel like you don't want to be talking to me? Do you even want to be here talking to me?"
When he didn't stop his aggression, I absolutely lost it. So, I said, "No, I don't. Bernard, I'm not doing this. I can't do this". And I walked away. I went to the back where three or four different coworkers checked up on me. One even offered to let me punch him to take out my anger. I did not take him up on his offer, but I love that kid.
At that point, I only had like 10 to 15 minutes left on my shift, so I got to go home. Bernard apologized to me and said he didn't expect him to speak to me that way. On one hand, I understand because Darren could come across as a normal calm customer. But on the other hand, this guy was literally just screaming at me. And he was at least 6'3 (192 cms) while I am 4'11 (125 cms).
Even his daughter was taller than me. I told Bernard that it felt a little biased because he was not as condescending with him as he was with me. But Bernard said that he felt it was more to do with height since he was just as tall and built similarly to the customer. Either way, he said that there was something off about that guy anyway, and I agree.
42. Cruising For A Bruising
I’m a femboy, which means that I’m a man who acts more feminine and in most occasions wears women’s clothing and such. One day, my boyfriend and I decided to go on a cruise vacation. We drove from our apartment early in the morning, since we live quite a ways from the harbor where we were going to sail from. It takes about 3-4 hours to drive.
I am totally not a morning person, but my boyfriend was completely zonked that morning from work, so I decided to drive so he could sleep some more. We got there about 30 minutes before departure so we parked the car and went out to smoke. I was ready to drop, I was that exhausted. I was so excited about our trip that I didn't get much sleep that night.
But we finished up, got our bags, and walked over to the check-in. Enter the witch and her little brat. Her: Move over, my son and I NEED to check in right now. We moved over since it wasn’t our first encounter with a woman like this. She finished checking in her son and herself so we got back to the counter and finished up as well.
All the while, we talked with the woman behind the counter about entitled parents. We got aboard and went looking for our cabin. It had a nice double bed, big TV on the wall, a nice view, etc. We packed out our luggage and settled in. We turned on the TV and watched Smokey and the Bandit while waiting for the announcement that we were departing.
When it came, we went up to the adult zone (one of the upper decks next to the bar) and who do we see, yup this woman and her kid. The kid can’t have been older than nine, and this zone was only for people 18 and older. Anyway, we ignore them and start kissing and being touchy-feely, and pretending like we’re Jack and Rose from Titanic.
The mom comes over. Her: You shouldn’t act like that here, my son is here watching the two of you. But you did well kid, having a cute girlfriend like that, and nice dress by the way. I was wearing something like a lace-up, tartan, asymmetrical dress since I like the punk-ish style. We just thanked her and went back inside to rest for a bit.
In the evening, we had a reservation at one of the fancier restaurants on board. We got there and since we had a reservation we could skip the huge line. Some people didn’t like it but stayed quiet, but not…her. Yep, she was there again. Her: Why do they get to skip the line while the rest of us have to stay behind? Let me trade with you, my son is very hungry.
I got tired of meeting her everywhere but hey, it’s a ship, surrounded by water, we can’t avoid her for long. We got to our table, still hearing her yelling at the workers. We ordered some drinks and food, then my boyfriend told me that he had something to ask me. He took his chair and pushed it out so he could stand, eyed the waiter that came over with a little black box, and I knew what was happening and started getting tears in my eyes.
I had been waiting for some time for this to happen. He got on one knee and asked, “Will you make me the happiest man on earth?” He barely finished the sentence when I said yes. No time to think, I just did it, since I can’t think of a life without him. Everyone started clapping and I gave him a long kiss. The entitled mom finally got through the line and saw us kissing.
Her: Can’t you kiss your girlfriend somewhere else? My son is with me. Boyfriend: First of all, I just proposed and kissed to make it official. Second, that is not my girlfriend, that’s my boyfriend. You could see all color disappear from her face. Her: ...How could you do that with children present? You should not do something like that at all. Blah, Blah, Blah.
While she kept yelling, I noticed that something smelled like poop and I couldn’t see her little brat anywhere, until....I looked down and there he was, trying to pull down my skirt. I quickly grabbed his hands and yanked him away from me. Mother: HOWDAREYOUTOUCHMYBABY Like that, yes. I don’t think she breathed at all during that sentence. And here we go...
Her: I will sue you for this. And stop wearing girl’s clothing, it is not ok to walk like that. My boyfriend was furious. He normally never lays a hand on anyone, but had I not seen it and stopped him, he would have slapped her into the next century. The woman saw what he was about to do and acted like he actually did it....with the employees and the manager looking at her.
She got escorted out and we got our meal on the house. After '' resting" in our cabin, we set out to find the bar. We heard there was live music and good drinks so we had to try it. We found it after wandering around for a while. We entered, ordered some drinks, and sat down. We drank quite a bit and decided to dance as fiancés. Well, who do we see...
Entitled Mother: STOOOOOP THE Music. It got quiet. Her: Don’t start the music until these two leave. She starts to sound like that typical Catholic priest while pointing at us all angry. But she got the exact opposite of what she wanted. The bartender comes over and says: Miss, I have to ask you to leave the bar. Her: Why do we have to leave while These Two get to stay?
Bartender: First of all, you brought a kid that most certainly is not 18 years or older. Second, we do not tolerate those comments. And lastly, you’re just a nasty person. You could almost hear her jaw drop to the floor as she looked for a response. She ended up leaving, music started playing again, and we gave an extra big tip before leaving to our cabin for some more cozy time.
The rest of our vacation went pretty much without meeting her and her devil spawn again. We are getting married in August.
43. Too Good To Be True
To preface, it needs to be said that my store does not have coupons. We never have, and we probably never will. On this day, I had a woman come in saying that she wanted to get decor for her new house. I offered to show her what we had available. She then mentioned that she was so excited that she was going to get such a good deal.
I assumed that was because everything she was picking out was 40% off. Spoiler alert: it was not. She proceeded to spend over an hour picking out everything and having us put it behind the counter for her. That was when she finally mentioned, “Oh yes, I was so happy to get a coupon for half off of everything here,” which was the major red flag.
I then asked her if I could see it while also explaining that we did not carry in-store coupons. She proceeded to spend another 30 minutes looking for the supposed coupon. I finally got a glance at her phone and it all made sense—she had pulled up one of those websites that claim to give out coupon codes, but they usually don't work.
It even said in a big text that they uncertified codes. She was perfectly polite the entire time but explaining to her that she couldn't use any of that in-store was exhausting. I know the older generation can have trouble with stuff like that, but it was like she just could not believe that she could not use her coupons. And, of course, she had us put half of it back.
44. Not-So Empty Threats
So I’m on a plane and I’m sat a few rows behind a family of four. The boarding is nearly complete. The daughter (entitled kid) is sobbing, and it gets more and more audible as more people get in and on their seats. Finally, the Entitled Mother gets a hold of the flight attendant and demands her to ask the captain "one more time" if they could have their dog in the cabin instead of the pet compartment.
The flight attendant tries to explain that their dog is too large and has to travel separately. This provokes the entitled kid to cry out even louder, and the flight attendant tries to explain how it is perfectly safe for animals to travel in their designated compartment underneath the passengers. The fuss starts to attract attention, and someone close to my row announces their severe allergy to dogs to the family and the flight attendant.
The mother raises her voice and demands the flight attendant to dig their luggage and dog out of the plane, as they will find another airline that allows all family members in the cabin. At this point, the plane is full and the doors are closed, and it seems the captain is waiting for confirmation from the crew to start rolling towards the take-off strip. The flight attendant tries to explain how they would have to go through all the luggage to find theirs, and how that would delay the flight.
The mother is having none of it and very clearly articulates, “You would turn back in an instant and go through it all if there was a bomb, wouldn't you?" All movement and chatter stop and the flight attendant gets very serious, "Please remain seated, we'll see what we can do". It takes less than a minute for officers to arrive and walk the family out.
It takes 10 more to get their luggage and the dog and another five for the flight to take off. Seeing the mad-angry husband with the crying kids watch their mom put in the patrol car was the best start for a holiday I've had in a long time.
45. Cost Per Spray
I work at a thrift store, and due to COVID, there needs to be a door greeter who greets customers coming in and sprays their hands with hand sanitizer. This was what I was doing when an elderly woman came in. As I sprayed her hands, she started coughing dramatically as though this was the first time anyone had ever done that.
Then, she said, “You sprayed too much. It got into my mouth". I immediately felt bad when she said that, but then she lost me when she said that it had gotten into her mouth. She was clearly wearing a mask. To top it off, as she walked away, she muttered something. It sounded like, “This is going to affect the amount of money I spend today". I don’t get how that affects me, but okay.
46. A Light At The End Of The Tunnel
I am a 28-year-old woman who just recently went fully blind. When I was a teenager, I volunteered with my local youth group to help rebuild Mississippi after hurricane Katrina, and while down there I picked up a fungal parasite called Histoplasmosis that, over a decade, migrated to my eyes and slowly caused blindness. I've been totally blind for about a year now, so I'm pretty new to it.
When I first went blind, I barely left the house and was afraid to go in public. I felt like everyone was staring at me and in all honesty, I barely knew what I was doing. The transition had been difficult and I didn't have any support group to teach me. One day my husband asks if I can take an Uber down to the bank and deposit a rent check and I reluctantly agree.
While out, he messages again and reminds me that we're out of a few crucial groceries. There was a Wal-Mart grocery literally across the street from the bank, so I figure everything in life is an experience and I'll have to learn how to shop alone eventually, so why not. Everything was fine at first and I was only grabbing a few things so I didn't need a cart.
I was using my cane and what little echolocation skills I had at the time to get around, but was still bumping into things as we blind tend to do sometimes. My cane suddenly hit something a bit softer and I figure maybe I had whacked someone's leg and apologize. Cue Entitled Kid (EK) and Entitled Mother (EM). Me: Shoot, I'm sorry—
EM: Hey! You just hit my son!! Me: I'm so sorry, ma'am, I didn't see him there. EM begins yelling: HOW COULD YOU NOT SEE HIM, HE'S CLEARLY RIGHT HERE!! Now, again, I'm fully blind, but I don't wear sunglasses. Mostly because I can’t afford a good UV blocking pair, but also I'm not ever looking for pity or to ''play the part'' of a generic blind person.
I just want to be treated like a normal person, but I do understand her confusion as blindness is a spectrum, so I try to calmly explain. Me: Ma'am, I'm blind, I can't see anything, let alone your son. That's why I have to use the cane, so I can get around without— She cuts me off: If you're blind, why aren't you wearing big sunglasses?
As a blind person, I get a lot of stupid questions, but I understand a lot of them are just people who don't know better, so I try to happily answer as many as I can. Me: Those are really expensive (around $200 for a good pair), and I really don't need any inside. Here is where my blood starts to boil. EM: You're not blind, you're faking it!
I can't think of any reason someone would want to pretend to be blind, and nothing makes me angrier more than when someone calls me a liar when I'm not. Just as I'm about to respond, I feel a tug and before I blink, I realize this little demon spawn has snatched my $100 cane from my hands. For those of you who don't understand, that's like if you're shopping and suddenly the power goes out and you can't see a single light.
Without my cane, I can barely move at all without crashing into anything. My voice gets shaky as I begin to panic: Please give that back! I REALLY DO NEED IT!! EM: No you don't, you liar. My son deserves to play with this more than you! I hear her shuffle away and my expensive cane cracking into metal displays and such as they leave.
I start crying and waving my arms in front of me to grab onto something, anything, and end up crashing and falling into a center aisle display, making a loud scene. I somewhat curl into a ball and cry. I'm alone in public, in the dark, and I had no idea what to do. Suddenly I feel a hand on my shoulder and a man's voice. We'll call him AG for awesome guy.
He asks if I'm okay and to stay right here. I do, but begin to at least sit up and listen. This man must have been tall and built like a tank because his footsteps sounded like a giant and I felt a suction of wind when he took off. Maybe about 30 or 40 feet away, I hear this loud bellowing like an angry lion and a loud crash, then before I know it the man is back and helping me to my feet.
He takes my hand and puts my cane into my palm and helps me pick up the items I dropped when I fell into the display. Me wiping tears from my cheeks: Thank you, thank you so much, I didn't know how to handle that. AG: Don't worry about it, some people are just monsters. This guy restored my faith in humanity and even helped me finish shopping and helped me out of the store.
As we're leaving, I can hear the familiar screeching of EM, something about AG grabbing the cane and pulling hard, flinging her little devil child into a shopping cart. I don't know if she was exaggerating or not but it would explain the crash I heard. It's easy to feel alone in a world without sight, but even through the sheer terror of being stripped of my cane, at least I know now that there are people willing to stand up for me when I need it.
47. A Question Of Receiving
I had a woman say that she didn’t want her receipt. Then, when I threw it out, she yelled and said that I should give her a receipt. So, I went to print a new one and she immediately said, “No, I want my original receipt". So, I pulled it out of my trash can, which only had receipt paper in it, and she goes, “It’s that one!”
I wondered, “Lady, how would you know? They’re all the same". However, I held my tongue and just say, “No, this is for a smaller purchase. You got a bigger size". I found hers and she huffed off. Fast forward a few days—I looked through the customer feedback box and I was shocked. We get a bad review saying that I was rude, threw out her receipt when she asked for it, and did not print her a new one.
It went on to claim that I just pulled a receipt out of the garbage and didn’t even give her the right receipt. Corporate gave her a gift card. I was done after that.
48. A Beautiful Thing
So, back in high school one of my closest friends got pregnant and gave birth to the sweetest baby boy. She stopped going to school for a while to take care of her kid, but still did online school so she could graduate with her class. One thing we would do is go to one of the local food places near the high school on Fridays. On this particular day, we decided to go to this nice Chinese place that I frequent regularly.
The little old Asian lady knows me by name. This Chinese place has a sticker on the front door that says something like "Breastfeeding will always be allowed," which is great since that's what my friend is more comfortable doing for her baby. After we ordered our food, we hung out in this little waiting area when the baby gets all fussy.
She takes out the little cover and covers her baby and her chest as she starts to feed him. We keep talking until this woman and her son, who had to be around 10, comes in. I recognize the kid as one of the kids I looked after when I use to volunteer at a youth center. He comes up to me and starts talking to me, and then asks my friend what she’s doing with the baby.
Before my friend could answer, the boy’s mother cuts in. "A disgusting thing is what she’s doing. Don’t you know better than to do that in public? And why are you even doing that if you're only a kid?" My friend has an attitude sometimes, so I try to jump in before she would start to throw things. "It’s not disgusting, and the owner, Mrs. L is fine with it. She has a sticker on the door".
Mrs. L was just ogling the baby a second ago. She smiles at us and continues to write some stuff down. The mother wasn’t happy about this and continues with her rant. "I'm sorry but I'm just not okay with a baby breastfeeding another baby. Can you please just stop," she says in frustration. Mrs. L finally cuts in and in her broken English, she says, "Nursing baby is a beautiful thing. You have problem, you leave".
She then taps the order on the window that leads to the kitchen and apologizes to my friend for the woman’s nasty behavior. She then looks at the boy who is still next to me and says jokingly, "Your mother, she dummy right?" This makes the boy laugh and the mother just grumble in her seat, trying to stay as far from us as she could.
When my friend finished and we grabbed our food, Mrs. L threw in an extra order of egg rolls, since they were my friend’s favorite.
49. An Ill-fitting Argument
I work at Zara as a sales associate. Due to COVID, our dressing rooms are closed because they would be used as a shared space and, therefore, they'd require a wipe down, among other things, every time they would be used. We just do not have the staff to do that. So even though the pandemic is starting to die down, no dressing rooms.
Our return policy is pretty standard, though, so most people do not give us any grief and just buy their items and return or exchange them the next day if they do not fit. No big deal, right? Right. So, this happened while I was walking back and forth from our dressing room, which we are using as an extra stock room, filling up the shelves.
We were in the middle of a big sale, so I was trying to hustle and get everything out there as fast as I could. I was putting knitwear on racks, humming along to the song that was playing, and just generally having a grand old time. Then, approached me. The dreaded demon. Karen. She goes, "Excuuuuuuuuse me!" And I'm immediately on guard.
I turned around and immediately all my warning sensors were going off. She looked like a total Karen. Stringy blonde hair, thin lips, years of sunburn that has ruined her skin, not wearing a mask—but has one pulled down below her chin—and a girl behind her in her late teens that looked absolutely miserable being out with her.
Before I even fully processed it, my brain just said, “Oh boy". I turned on my customer service smile and said, "Hi! How can I help you?" She was immediately in my face, not respecting social distancing at all. She demanded to know if we had a fitting room open, saying, "I was just by your fitting rooms and I saw your sign. Do you have any fitting rooms open?"
The sign clearly said that we did not, but I started with my little spiel. I said, "No, we do not have the fitting rooms open due to COVID, but our return policy still stands, even for the sale, so—" She interrupts me by saying, "But I need a fitting room". She also stepped closer to me so I stepped back. Clearly, she had no respect for our social distancing rules.
I tried to explain again that she couldn't use the fitting room, but she wouldn't have it. "I just saw someone in there". I replied, "I know, ma'am. That was my manager; she's pricing items". That apparently was not a good enough explanation for her, and she rebutted, "So she's back there and I can't be?" I just said "Yes". She still kept trying to get close to me and I kept taking steps back.
She had me quite literally backed into a corner. She proceeded to retort, "This policy is ridiculous. I can't believe this is still instituted, it's completely absurd". She then went on this entire rant about how stupid she thought the whole situation was. Apparently, she felt that she had to explain to me how stores work.
I replied, "Well, ma'am, we are still in the middle of a pandemic, and if we were to open the fitting rooms now, then we wouldn't have the staff to keep them clean and also run the store". She rolled her eyes and just started talking about how stupid and ridiculous it was that we couldn't accommodate her. At that point, I had enough.
I try to get her to stop attacking me for things I cannot control by putting it in perspective, "Ma'am, I'm just a sales associate and this policy comes from corporate. There's really nothing that I can do about this". This apparently enrages her, and she starts demanding that I change the policy right that second and get in touch with corporate to change the policy just for her.
At that moment, I had a divine moment of self-reflection. My third eye opened and I realized that throughout the whole conversation, I had been looking down. I am 5'3" (162 cm), so I don't get to look down at people very often. In arguments, I always feel stupid because I'm yelling up at whoever I am arguing with.
I am clearly not tall, but at that moment, I felt like an Amazonian goddess. I realized that I did not need to fear the Karen because the Karen would never have the dignity of talking down to me in an argument. She was still ranting and raving at this point, talking about how I needed to be the one who instituted the change because it's my job in danger.
I looked at her, gave her my best sales smile, and said, "Zara is an internationally successful company, ma'am. I am pretty confident in my job. You have a nice day, now". And I gave the polite gesture of "Get out of my way". She stormed off, and the daughter, who had been silent and miserable the entire time, whispered, "I am so sorry," and hurries after her mom.
I went to the fitting room and complained to my manager, who made a few choice comments about the Karens who don't take the pandemic seriously. I love that lady, truly. Also, when I got home, I searched for Zara's net worth out of curiosity. Seeing the results, I was relieved. Not worried about my job, not even a little bit.
50. (Don’t) Just Keep Swimming
So let me tell y’all about how this mother tried to have me be her free babysitter/lifeguard. We just got one of those above ground pools you set up yourself that is 4 feet deep and 14 feet round. We spent the majority of two days prepping and filling it and letting it warm. Finally yesterday it was ready, and my daughter asked if she could invite a little girl she is semi-friendly with from down the street to come swim with her.
Since they are eight and they are tall enough to stand with heads above water, I said ok. Well, her little friend brought her toddler sister, who is probably on the younger side of two. definitely too small to stand with her head above the water. I tell the friend that her little sister can’t get in the water unless her mom is here to watch her, and send her home with the message. They both come back and she says, “Mom said she’s fine in her float and I can watch her".
And I said “No it’s not fine, I don’t think an eight-year-old is responsible enough to watch a toddler in a pool, and I am not going to be the one watching her either. You need to tell your mom either she comes to watch your little sister or she is not getting in the pool". They both go home and then BOTH COME BACK!! At this point I am livid.
I walk back to their house with them and pound on the door. No answer. I keep knocking, and then the garage door starts to open with this woman backing her car out!! I quickly went and stood at the end of the driveway with all the kids in tow, both of hers and both of mine. She gets out of her car all angry and asks me what my problem is?!
I tell her my problem is that I’m not her babysitter, and that I am definitely not going to be responsible for keeping her baby from drowning in MY swimming pool on MY property! Her reaction was chilling. She then proceeds to start baby-talking her own kids, saying, “I’m so sorry babies the mean lady isn’t going to let you swim, I’m so sorry princesses” and on and on. Of course, the toddler bursts into tears, and then the mother screams at me.
“Look what you’ve done!! You’ve made her cry and ruined her day! Hope you are proud of yourself!! She then snatches up the little sister, who is screaming, tosses her in the car, and screams at the friend to get in too. The friend is red in the face, and you can tell she is so embarrassed. She just mumbles sorry while climbing in the car. The mother then proceeds to peel out of her own driveway and we walk back home. Witch.
For what it’s worth, I was NOT planning on leaving the kids wholly unattended. I was right beside the pool doing yard work and planned on continuing once all the kids were in the pool. I just did not want to watch a small toddler in the pool, as she would require extreme supervision. Like sitting and staring directly at her kind of supervision.
51. Fishing For Trouble
I work at an aquatics store and I manage the freshwater aquariums. Whenever I work at the store, I usually ask people about their fish tanks to help them figure out any problems the tanks may have or recommend the best fish for them. Most of the time, I can help them prevent any beginner mistakes, or just stop their fish from expiring.
A few days ago, a lady came in a few minutes before closing. I was already behind on closing because of other customers, so I was kind of tired. This lady brought in deceased fish and a water sample. The parameters looked good, but as a hobbyist myself, I suspected ammonia poisoning for her fish. We did not test for ammonia though.
Furthermore, this lady had done a full water change before her fish kicked it. So, I went through the usual—I explained the proper way to do a water change (25% every week) and also recommend products. She wanted a quick fix despite me explaining that her cycle was a mess and that there was no way that her fish would survive unless she started her cycle all over again.
Such is a process that can take weeks sometimes. Instead of listening, she made up an excuse about how she really needed to take some fish home because her kids want them. I still tried to guide her to a sensible decision. I recommended that she take only two fish so as to not shock the new cycle too much. All went well until she realized something that I had overlooked myself—the fish sale would end in a few days.
Then she insists that she absolutely must take the other fish too. I mentally say, “Alright. Fine. Take your fish". Out loud I remind her that there is a good chance her fish are going to lose their lives unless she is very careful with her cycle. I, finally, send her on her way thirty minutes after closing because she would not listen to any advice that I gave her.
This was despite asking me what she could do and then not wanting to do it because she thought that it was too much work or she did not have time. I explained it later to the manager and she said that if she came back to return those same fish, I was to deny her the sale.
52. Eat My Dust
I recently had an emergency appendectomy, and recovery has been slow. I had to take time off from my own athletics, but worse, from coaching in the kid’s sports program I’m involved with. The experience made me step back and realize I really built my whole identity around being active and healthy, so the hit my physical abilities took as a result of being sick and the healing process has made me feel lost.
I’ve been working to regain the joy I used to experience from exercise, without going “Oh, you used to be so much faster with that,” or “Your technique used to be so much stronger,” or “You don’t fit in anymore,” or whatever else and just enjoy myself regardless of the level I’m at. But ironically, the anxiety about not being able to do what I used to has made regaining those abilities difficult.
It made me self-conscious about exercising in public spaces, but I was starting to finally get over it as friends convinced me the source of the concerns was all in my head. There’s no way to get back to it other than training, so despite the anxiety, I started running again, as soon as the doctors approved it. I went to the local track and just did a few slow laps each morning, building up speed every few days.
I’ve only just been authorized to add some sprints and bodyweight strength training to the mix. Occasionally there were other people at the track, but I didn’t really notice because I run with headphones on and try to zone out in these lighter sessions. But little did I know, my friends were wrong. It was not all in my head. I was being watched, and more than that, I was being judged.
This was my absolute catastrophe-level worst nightmare at this stage of building back my strength and speed. On Friday, I was setting up for practice at the kid’s program and the head coach asked me into his office because a parent had a complaint. A parent I didn’t know too well, Karen, was there and he said she had specific complaints about me.
I was a bit nervous, as anyone is being called to meet with their boss over a complaint, but I figured it was a classic case of “My kid should start more,” or “I know my kid tried out as a midfielder but I want him/her to switch to defense,” that kind of “rules don’t apply to me” thing. But instead, I sit down in the office, and Karen is playing my boss a video of me running on the track.
That she filmed from afar; it’s surrounded by stadium-style risers. I was horrified, both because no one is ever totally used to seeing themselves on video, and because I was just embarrassed about how slow I was. But most importantly because why was a virtual stranger (I’d met her personally maybe four times, ever) filming me while I ran on my own time at a private facility?
She then went on to explain that her eight-year-old son, one of the players on my squad, was lapping me in the video. She was insisting the coaches need to hold themselves to higher athletic standards than the young players if they want to prepare them for college teams. (Again, her son is eight.) Apparently, her son would sometimes be running on the track while her older child was practicing on a nearby field.
I never noticed, the kid is still relatively new, and again, I don’t pay much attention to the other people on the track. My boss patiently but firmly explained to Karen that my physical abilities are not the parents’ concern, and all personnel are closely managed by the head coaches who understand each unique situation and what’s appropriate, and that her son wouldn’t be impacted.
But she didn’t stop there. Karen then went on to say my being out of shape was probably connected to why I’d been taking so much time off lately. Uh... technically yes, it is, because I was in the hospital. She was complaining that the personnel changeover isn’t good for the kids. My boss again reiterated that the head coaches hadn’t changed or taken any time off and that I was still one of the most skilled in the area I instruct, so this was not her concern.
She asked if there was someone else she could speak to, but he explained that he was the owner and founder of this program, so, no there was not. I knew my boss was intentionally avoiding saying what had happened to me or even alluding to a health issue, to protect my privacy, but I figured maybe being transparent with her would show her how ridiculous she was being—and keep her tuition dollars in our program.
But when I explained, she just turned to the boss and said, “Well maybe you should furlough her until she’s healed and bring on a healthy coach in the meantime, because my son needs someone out there who can keep up with him". My boss respected what I was trying to do, but made clear we weren’t going further with that strategy to avoid setting a precedent of sharing coaches’ personal circumstances.
Telling her why people take time off or what their health status may be is not her concern because the program manages that and makes appropriate decisions. She kept kicking up a fuss, but the coach finally told her he had to get back out on the field, back to her son and everyone else’s kids. She started physically leaving but continued fussing about how she was not satisfied and would not be recommending us to other parents.
Pro tip—this is not the way to conduct yourself with the people who make recommendations to scouts concerning family culture/team interaction. The coach wasn’t preparing to leave, instead, he stopped her in her tracks to tell her if she was found to be surveilling or otherwise harassing any staff members again, she would be perma-banned from the program.
No games or practices, no team social events, no presence in our buildings, and no clemency. So, that was pretty satisfying. Her son is a good, average, kid and I’m glad the consequences were focused on booting her out rather than limiting his opportunities to have fun playing. So then we went out and had a great, happy, safe practice.
This was still a pretty upsetting event for me personally though, and I’ll never unsee that discouraging video of me running, but it was ultimately reassuring to know the other staff has my back. Leaving Karen in the dust is just another step on my road to recovery!
53. A Calculated Move
In one of my old jobs, I worked in a coffee shop. I really enjoyed it and the people who came in regularly were a dream. One time, the till had broken down, and we resorted to a pen-and-paper process to take people's orders. We also worked out their change correctly by punching it into the calculator. Everything was going well.
Or, it was going well..until this absolute demon of a customer came in. She started rattling off her order. I was hurriedly writing it down and double-checking the prices on the menu. She saw what I was doing and she tutted me as if she was disappointed. She also had the audacity to tap on the broken till and say, "Why aren't you using this? Surely it's easier?"
I pointed to the sign next to them and said as nicely as possible that we were using pen and paper, etc. Then, rolling her eyes, she said her order slowly but with a condescending tone. After taking her order, I took my time repeating it back to her, since she had asked for a lot. Apparently, that was too much for them.
She responded by saying, "I am in a hurry and you are taking too long". I apologized and explained that I simply wished to make sure that the order was correct. Then I proceeded to total up her order with the calculator, and I heard her sighing and huffing as I was typing away the figures. She said, "Why do you need a calculator? Clearly, someone did not finish math, or else you would not be working here".
That was the final straw. I balled up the piece of paper, threw it in the bin next to me, and said, "Another member of staff will be with you to help you shortly". I made my way to the staff area and told my manager what had happened. They told me to relax and said that they would sort it. Needless to say, I watched as my manager went out and made it very clear that the customer’s business was not welcome.
I just wish that I had the sense to throw that balled-up piece of paper in her face. I hate people like that.
54. An Unwelcome Visitor
Buckle up everyone for this bumpy ride. Okay, so I was chilling in my living room around 3 am playing some video games. My parents are out of town visiting some friends and I decided to stay home, house to myself and all. So here I am, in nothing but a bra and panties, when there's a knock on the door. "What the heck?” I think to myself.
I scramble to get my clothes on and I answer the door. It was a family acquaintance with her already whiny little brat. She's also visibly pregnant, and we'll get to why that part is important later. Me: Hey, what's going on? Her: My car broke down and the tow company can't come to get it until tomorrow, think me and my kid can crash here tonight?
Me: Sure, you guys can sleep in the living room. Once I let them in, I asked if she wanted anything and went to get the coffee she asked for. As I go get it, I see the little brat picking up my controller. Me: Hey little guy, please put that down. Her: Oh, can't he play a game? Me: Sorry, no. I'm in the middle of something, plus he wouldn't know how to play the type of game.
Her: But he reeealllly wants to, don't you? Him: I WANT TO PLAY!!!! Me: No, you can't play. Him: I WANT TO PLAY I WANT TO PLAY I WANT TO PLAAAAAAAAAAAAAY AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. He then throws the controller at the TV, shattering the screen. Me: WHAT THE HECK? I rush over to the TV. Her: Hey! Don't you yell at my child! Me: YOU JUST LET HIM DESTROY MY TV LIKE THIS. Her: You're the one who didn't let him play the video game.
Me: I said no, and you have to teach your brat that he isn't owed ANYTHING. Her: How dare you! Just wait until I tell your mother about how you treated him, you'll make a terrible mom. Me: I'm not having kids, but if I did I wouldn't let them be spoiled little brats! Her: YOU are being the brat right now! Just get a new TV and quit whining.
Me: Yeah, I'll get a new TV with the money you pay me for the broken one. Her: WHAT?! But YOU are the one who instigated it. Me: You know what? Just get out of my house. You and your brat are no longer welcome. Her: What is wrong with you? I'm preeeegnant and have a toddler and have nowhere to go, you can't just kick out a stranded pregnant mother and her toddler at 3 am in the cold.
Me: OH YES I CAN, YOU INSUFFERABLE WITCH. Get OUT of my house before I call the authorities. Her, picking her brat up and heading towards the door: Just wait until I tell your mother about this! Me: Yeah, I'll gladly tell her about what the little brat to the TV and that you refused to pay for it! Her: You'll regret this! Thankfully, though, she left.
The next morning I called my parents and explained what happened. They were very understanding because I was never raised to be a spoiled little jerk and the mom got an earful from my mom that if she didn't pay them back we would take her to small claims. She tried to play the “Woe is me” card but it didn't work and she forked over the $500 for the new TV. Then we cut contact with her.
55. Delivering It In Style
I work at a shipping store. One day, I was asked to ship something to Iraq to who I assume was an army husband. Well, as a typical Karen, she gave lip and was upset about price and other small things. After a long process, we got the $20 of junk shipped. A few weeks later, she returned to the store, upset. She demanded to see my boss.
She began to chew him out about how I sent the package to the wrong place and how we charged her too much. Her problem was that she wanted to send it to an army base, which should have astronomically reduced the price. My boss took one look at her, and shut her up with a single sentence: "Ma’am, how does my employee know a random street address in Iraq unless you told him to send it there?"
Karen was dumbfounded and, after a few moments of being flabbergasted, she rambled back that she would call the local news. She never did that or the other things that she threatened to do. She didn't even write a bad message on Google.
56. Fun For The Whole Family
This took place a couple of years ago, when I was 17 and I used to spend part of my summers helping out in my grandpa's restaurant. The restaurant was located on the bottom floor of our family house in a little village (30 inhabitants) and my maternal great-grandparents lived on the upper floor. In the restaurant, my great-grandmother and my grandma were in charge of cooking and my great-grandpa and granddad were in charge of attending the tables.
It was kind of small, as it had like eight tables of four on the inside, and we could set another two outside if the weather was good. As the restaurant also served as a bar, it was filled with locals. Since many of them were retired, they used to spend the whole day playing cards and drinking, so although it was a small location, in summer usually it was full of people.
Also, my great-grandparents founded this restaurant in the year 1941, therefore it was well-known and had a good reputation among the locals. I'm also proud to say that my great-grandparents were very loved in their community as they really were great people. Although it was a quite remote place, in summer we used to get like four or five groups of tourists per week.
The rule was that my brother and I were in charge of serving their tables as we were the only ones who knew any other language than Spanish, our native tongue. Our opening hours at the time were from 12:00 to 22:30 but the kitchen was only open from 13:00 to 15:00 and from 19:30 to 21:00. We only served one menu, composed of a starter, two main dishes, dessert, and cider or water.
So now the story. It was around 16:00, therefore most of the customers had finished eating and were chatting over a cup of coffee or some pints. My grandparents and great-grandparents were still eating as they waited until everyone was finished. Meanwhile, my brother and I were in charge of serving the tables just in case anyone wanted something else to drink.
Suddenly we hear a car outside, and I can hear a woman loudly speaking in English. As soon as they enter, this happens. Her: We would like to have a table, X from the Y Hotel told us this was a great place to eat. Me: I'm sorry ma'am, but the kitchen is already closed as it's kind of late. Her: Yes, it's late because we got lost in these stupid roads! Is it so difficult to put proper signals? Also, we have a little kid who is hungry.
Me: Oh, I'm sorry to hear that, let me check If I can do something for you. I then went inside and explained the situation to my grandma, who told me to attend them as everything was already prepared and it would be just heating the food. Her: Well, are you going to give us a table or not? If the kitchen is closed, how is it that those people are eating.
At this point, she pointed at my grandpas. At the moment, I thought she was behaving like that because she was kind of hungry. I wasn't really used to dealing with rude people, as the majority of tourists used to be really respectful. Me: Well those are the owners, so they can eat whenever they want. (I said this while laughing a bit). Anyway, I have just asked them and you will be able to eat too, so please follow me to your table.
They follow me to the table and I explain to them that there is only one menu. They give me a strange look but they seem OK with that. I serve them the bread and I put a bottle of water on the table. They start devouring the bread so my "They were a bit rude cause they were hungry" theory seemed to be confirmed. I was so, so wrong.
As soon as I bring the starter, the dad demands to have the Wi-Fi password. Him: Hey, we see that there is a Wi-Fi network, what’s is the password? Me: Yes, there is one. However, the Wi-Fi is for the staff’s personal use. (We had a measured and reeeeally slow connection that my grandpa used for checking some newspapers and my brother and I used for sending Whatsapps to our friends). Him: That's ridiculous! We are paying customers and we deserve to have access to your Wi-Fi!
Mom: Yes, our little angel wants to watch some videos. We don't have any kind of internet access here! Me: Sorry, but as I have said it's for personal use. Mom: That's not right, this would be unacceptable in America. Me: Well, I'm sorry to inform you that we are not in America. The mom tells something to the kid and he starts running around the restaurant, stomping his feet and shouting
My great-grandpa comes to me and asks me what is happening, I explain the whole situation to him and he asks me to please translate what he is going to say. Him: Please lady control your child, or I will have to ask you three to leave. Her: DON'T YOU DARE TELL ME HOW TO RAISE MY CHILD YOU DINOSAUR! Father: DON'T GET CLOSE TO MY CHILD YOU OLD CREEP! By this point, everyone is of course looking with disbelief to these morons.
I hesitate for a second, but translate all of this to my great-grandpa, expecting a not really nice reaction. Instead of saying anything, he slowly turns around and asks two men who are sitting at a table to take the whole family out of his restaurant. I proceed to explain to the family that if they don't get out, those two men, who also happened to be law enforcement officers, would be taking them out.
They don't seem to believe that those two men were officers and they refused to leave until we served them. Finally, both men stood up, showed their plaques, and asked them (in their best English) to leave. They finally stand up and leave. However, as they were leaving the officers realized that they had parked in front of our garage, blocking it.
At that point, they decided to ask for their rental car papers while taking a couple of photos and giving them a fine for blocking a private property garage.
57. Discounting It
A doctor came into the store a few days ago with a bag of clothes. She asked if we had discounts for health care workers, to which we said that we did not. The discounts were only for military personnel and teachers or students. Immediately after hearing this, she got upset and said that doctors worked much harder and deserved it more than teachers.
In my eyes, it was rude and ignorant to expect that a well-paid doctor should get a discount over teachers who are severely underpaid. If she could come to our store and blow $300 on clothes and also have other shopping bags on her, I seriously doubt she needed a discount. But it only got worse. She had the audacity to say, "Well, who was working hard during the pandemic? Yeah, doctors! That’s right".
It's true in some ways, but she was also very well paid. Teachers, on the other hand, do so much to teach the younger generation, including future doctors, but they are not paid nearly enough, which is why they often get discounts. It just blew my mind how she sat there bashing teachers for getting a discount as if it was something the employees decided on.
58. Adults Only
I attended an adult-only wedding for a co-worker a few days ago. The actual ceremony was in a very small church, so it was mostly family and close friends but the reception was for roughly 250 people. The reception was at a very elegant hotel ballroom. Not child-friendly in any way. Crystal stemware, expensive linens on the table, etc.
About 1/2 hour into the reception, a commotion started that made everyone stare. This entitled mother is arguing with the wedding planner loudly. Me being the nosy broad that I am, I inched closer to hear. It turns out this woman brought her four young children to the reception even though the invitations clearly stated Adults Only.
The entitled mother insisted that her kids—the oldest one looked eight and the youngest was under a year old—were super well-behaved so it was fine. Now keep in mind this was around 7:30 pm. The planner was having none of it. She insisted that children were not allowed and she had to leave. In a last ditch effort to get admitted, the mother shouted at the bride.
The bride went over and listened to her for a moment, and then said in a syrupy sweet voice, "Of course you can come in, but your children cannot". Then she turned on her heel and went back to her new husband. The mother flipped a nut, yelling about how she was invited, couldn’t find a babysitter, etc. Three of the groomsmen escorted her and her kids to the door.
59. Rules Are For Others
My store is currently closed for in-store shopping and we don’t have a proper click-and-collect set up yet. The system we have basically sends us an email, then we call the customer to confirm. Well, someone called about 30 minutes to close on Saturday and I squeezed her order in at the last minute.
She yelled, "Ugh, whatever," and hung up on my manager. We got back to her within an hour and placed her order. When she came to pick up both on Saturday, she disregarded all our COVID policy signs saying to call the store for pick-ups. Instead, she climbed over the barriers to knock on the store’s door. I was on the phone with a customer when she did this, and my coworker was completely out of sight.
. When she did it again today, I gestured for her to call us. She called, and then when I collected her order and opened the door, she laid into me about how rude I was being. I countered, "I think it was rather rude of you to ignore all our signs and barriers and knock on the door". She got very upset and yelled at me about how she was never coming back. "You'll be lucky to have a job tomorrow," she threatened.
60. If You Know, You Know
I’m home from college, and my parents require me to have a summer job. I’m blessed enough that I get to keep all the money I earn, my parents just like me to work to gain experience. This will be relevant later, but I’m not a skinny girl. I wouldn’t consider myself large either, I’m 5’6” tall and weigh about 140-145 lbs. right now and carry most of it in my hips and thighs.
The freshman 15 did hit me hard though, as I used to be 120ish. So today after finishing my last online final, my dad called me. He told me that one of his friends who runs a company texted him that they were looking for girls to work in the office, answering phones and stuff. I got excited because that’s exactly what I wanted, so I put on a dress, printed a copy of my résumé, and drove down.
The ladies inside were super nice and asked me to fill out an application, so I sat down to do so. We’re in the South which might be relevant, because typically for jobs like this they’re looking for a “pretty face” to sit behind the counter and talk to customers. This is unspoken, though. Yes, it’s awful but hey, I needed a job. So, as I’m filling out an application, this entitled mom enters with her teenage daughter.
She announces that she’s here about the opening and her daughter would like to apply. The one receptionist explains that she’ll need to fill out an application and hands her one and a pen. They come to sit in the lobby, right beside me, which I thought was weird but I didn’t say anything. Mom (to me): “Are you here for the job as well?” Me: “Yes ma’am". Mom: “Hmph". You know, that little cocky sound people make? I ignored her and went up to ask the receptionist a question about the application.
When I returned and sat back down, the mother walked up to the desk. Mom: “Does my daughter even really need to fill this out?” Receptionist: “It’s protocol. The boss will look at all the applications and decide who to call for an interview". Mom: “Is he here? I’m sure if he could see my daughter, he’d know who he wanted to call, ha!”
Receptionist: “He is, but he isn’t seeing visitors right now". Mom: “How will he know who to hire if he doesn’t know what the girls look like?” Receptionist: “Well, he will need to see their references and will make a few calls before he—” Mom: “No. My daughter is an aspiring model. She won [insert local pageant] in 2019. He needs to see her to know she’s the face he wants to see behind the counter interacting with customers".
Receptionist: “I’m not sure what you mean? This isn’t a modeling job, looks don’t really matter...” Mom: “Oh I know, but they do. And let’s face it, your boss isn’t going to want” —at this point, she leans in closer— “a chubby girl up here, is he?” This whole time, the daughter is smirking at me in glances as she fills out her application.
This caught the attention of the second receptionist as well as me, and we both looked up at this point. Other receptionist: “Ma’am, I’m not sure I know what you mean". Mom: “Oh, no disrespect, I just know the boss personally and know he’d prefer a new pretty face around the office. Maybe I’m a little biased, but I think there’s no question between my daughter and, well, this young lady for example. No offense honey, just trying to save you some time".
At this point, I’m in tears. I don’t know if it was rage or the sting of her insult, but either way, I was NOT going to let her see me cry, so I quickly got up and handed my application to the first receptionist before trying to leave. Second receptionist (who is a plus-sized woman): “Sweetie, wait". (talking to me) (turning to the mom) “You say you know the boss personally, right?”
Mom: “Oh, yes, we went to high school together". Second receptionist: “And you know him so well that you know he’d prefer a skinny woman behind this desk?” Mom: “Well, I didn’t say that, but I’d assume so". This is when the hammer dropped down. Second receptionist: “Great. Well, I’m his wife and I’ve worked behind this desk for almost 15 years now, and as you can see I could probably drop a few, and I take personal offense to what you’re saying about my husband and this young lady, so I’d like you to wait in the car while your daughter fills out her application".
Both the mom and the daughter stormed out at that point, with the daughter taking her application, so I don’t know if she’ll apply or not. But, both women behind the counter told me that the mom was a witch and they’d vouch for me with the boss, so I’m hopeful that I got the job!
61. Dog Days
Several years ago, I used to work as a dog trainer at a very well-known pet supply store. While I was a dog trainer, it was still retail, so of course, I had to do 100 things outside of my job description. As a result, I was working the cash register, stocking, and yes, helping our loyal customers. The store I worked at was an absolute disaster with Karens, too.
Big, white suburban neighborhoods were situated around this store, so they came in like hordes. Well, on this particular day, it was vet day. Basically, a local vet service partnered with the store to offer quick walk-in vet checkups for things like vaccinations. Of course, put "cheap" and "Karens" together and you get the worst workday of your week.
This week, the store was packed. The line went all the way to the front, and we were the biggest store in the area. People were asking me questions left and right, dogs were relieving themselves everywhere, and kids were playing with the dog toys. It was the whole shebang. I was already like a headless chicken, having to juggle five tasks while also prepping for a dog training class. Yay.
But as I was making my way from the vet station helping another customer, I saw her, and she definitely looked like trouble. She had a dark tan, shoulder-length straight hair, sunglasses, and she was dragging a couple of kids down the aisle toward me. She looked like she was wanting to turn into the Hulk and was ready to fight. I prepped myself before I started to say, "How can I help—"
She stopped me in the middle of my sentence by saying one loud word, "Dogs!" She had a crazy gleam in her eyes. I tried to decipher her cryptic message and asked, "Dog...toys? Dog...food?" She then said, “Where are your dogs?” It took a second for my brain to catch up with her shrieks; to understand that she was hoping that we sold dogs.
Now, luckily, big box stores like this one tend to not sell dogs directly. Otherwise, they would get them from puppy mills. But now, unfortunately, I had to inform this lady that we were not that kind of store. I geared myself up for a battle, then said: "I am sorry, ma’am, but we do not sell dogs he—" She cursed and shrieked, then immediately spun around, pulling her kids like ragdolls the entire time.
She then stomped out the door again. It felt like I got hit and run over by words. This interaction was less than 30 seconds, so it was like a new record. It was then that I decided it would be best if I took my break before doing my next class.
62. Taking A Bow
Several years back, I was working at a small beauty supply store in the southern part of the US. Among other things, we sold little clip-in hairpieces. A family of four had come in and the mom and dad were discussing products in the first aisle while the two little girls were running unsupervised through the store, being loud and making messes.
It was truck day, and I had been stocking shelves out of a shopping cart, referred to as a buggy by many people in that area. It was chock full to the brim. I had gone to the stock room and when I came back 30 seconds later, I saw one of the little girls pushing my cart around the corner of the opposite end of the aisle.
She was standing on her tiptoes and still could not see over the handle. I heard her say something to her mother and her mother told her, "Put that back where you found it". By that time, I had nearly caught up with the kid, who had turned the basket around. She pushed the cart up to me and said proudly, "Ma'am, are you lookin' for yer buggy?"
I replied, "You do not need to be messing with that". That's when the mom's Karen came out. She came roaring around the corner saying how I should not speak directly to her child and that if I had something to say, then I should say it to her. Never mind the fact that the kid had run into a shelf, slipped a bit on the tile floors, and almost turned the basket over on herself on the opposite side of the store from her mother's location.
I did not bother to argue about safety concerns and instead went back to stocking shelves. A little while later, the mother asked me to help her match the color of her hair to the hairpieces. I helped her pick one out, then heard her confirm to her husband that it was the one she wanted. I then went up to the register, while she rounded up her kids.
When she got to the checkout, the hairpiece that she put on the counter was a different one than what I had seen her discussing. I asked her about it and she indicated that the other one was more than she could afford, but she planned to come back for it. I rang her out and they left. The next day, I got to work and the opening clerk said, "I got one of your customers today".
I said, "Oh yeah?" I didn't get customer complaints often, but that particular week, I had someone else come in, while I was off, saying that I was rude. They had been unhappy that I had prevented them from shoplifting but they gave some other bogus reason to complain. When my coworker confirmed this, it was in a tone that made it clear I was in for a ride a bit later.
So, I asked, "Have you ever seen me be rude to a customer?" "No," she answered. "It always seems like you're sweet, but to hear them tell it, you're big and bad". About that time, the door opened, and in walked the hairpiece woman and her kids. It was about to go down. She started laying into me about how she had come to return the hairpiece that she got yesterday.
We did not take returns on hairpieces in the first place. However, she said that in the process of trying to return it with my co-worker, they had found a discrepancy between the item that she was trying to return and the one I had rang up. So, my coworker had asked her to come back during my shift so I could assist with the return.
This woman pulled the product that she wanted to return out and it was a different product than the one she purchased from me—in fact, it was the one that I had heard her tell her husband she wanted...and it was in a different product box. I told her as much, and she started screaming, saying that I better not be calling her a liar.
She also started making thinly veiled physical threats. In the meantime, one of her darling kids had come back around the sales counter where I was standing and she was trying to get my attention to get in on the action. I was ignoring the girl, but she kept tapping me on the hip. I whirled around and curtly said, "Don't touch me".
Then, remembering the scene from the day before, I snapped my head back to the mom and smiled sweetly. Through gritted teeth, but with the most upbeat voice, I said, "I am sorry, could you please tell your child not to touch me and remove her from behind the counter. It's not safe for her to be back here". She snarled, "That's better".
She barked a command at her kid, then made it clear that she would be back in an hour to continue her reign of terror. Shortly after she left, our store manager arrived unexpectedly early for the closing shift. We brought her up to speed on what had been going on. When the lady came back, I happened to be in the stock room.
My manager closed the stock room door and told me in the sternest voice ever: "Do NOT come out". I could only hear snippets through the door, so I don't know exactly what happened. I got the picture that we must have given her some money back as a one-time thing, probably because the other option was to refer to corporate, who would have given her money back.
But then I very clearly heard the woman's voice ring across the store, "Go get her and bring her out here. I am going to snatch her up and…" "You will not lay a hand on my employee," my manager emphatically interrupted. I did not hear any of the exchange after that, because I was so shocked at my sweet, proper manager's firm retort.
My coworker, apparently, was similarly surprised. The consensus among the employees after that was that we were pretty proud of how tough our manager could be if needed. They also decided that if I was being rude to a "customer," it was probably someone stealing.
63. In The Dog House
So I’m a 20-year-old woman and I work as a dog groomer. I’ve been one for four, almost five years. The big thing in dog grooming is reputation, quality, and time management. Yesterday, we were expecting a girl to come in at 10:00 to try out as a dog groomer. She was promising, 23 or 25 years old, and had worked as a dog groomer at other places.
She didn’t show till 4:30. No call. No nothing. She apparently had a hair appointment and friends from out of town came in so they got their nails done. She asked if she could groom now. I said no, I don’t think so. When she pressed, I said (and I might be a jerk for saying this): “We don’t want or need you. There’s no need to reschedule your try-out".
I went back to get my last two dogs done. Apparently, she cried and I was starting to feel bad. Then came the entitled mother. Her mom came in this morning demanding we give her a second chance. I told her, “Your daughter was six and a half hours late. That’s not something that works in dog grooming". The mom replied, “She was with friends. I’d think someone your age would understand that".
Me: “Not when there’s a job interview. She didn’t call or anything". At this point, I was ticked and over it. I have five dogs to get done. She said, “Well, there was no reason to make her cry!” I said I disagree and got back to work. Apparently, she stayed up there and demanded we give her another shot. As head dog groomer I said, not gonna happen. She left eventually, saying her daughter was too good for us.
64. She Took Matters Into Her Own Hands
I worked at a popular restaurant. During dinner service, we usually had 30-40 minute long wait times. People were told about this by the hosts. There was this lady who got fed up with the wait after 10 minutes. She stormed into the restaurant, stood next to a table of four people, and literally asked them, "Are you guys done? We've been waiting for a long time now and would like to have the table if you guys are just chatting."
65. Food Not Picture Perfect
I went on a date with a Karen once. It started out alright, but then when her food arrived, it didn’t look like the picture, so she demanded it be sent back. I’m pretty polite, so I waited to eat. I swear they sent the exact plate back. She lost it and demanded to see the manager. At that point, I started eating.
The manager came over, and the whole restaurant was looking like “what’s going on". She just laid into him. I placed a twenty on the table to cover mine and slipped the waitress a ten while mouthing an apology. I left right after that, and I never did find out what happened. I drove to the restaurant too, so I have no idea how she got home. I blocked her number as I left.
66. She Got A Doggone Sweet Surprise
I used to clean a local gymnastics facility on the weekends. The owner would rent out the place for birthday parties, and one of the coaches was always present for them. One weekend, I saw a car pull up about an hour before the party was to start. I was finishing cleaning the lobby, and we had no power as our lights were being replaced.
This woman came in and headed upstairs. About ten seconds later, she came STORMING down the stairs, got in my face, and started yelling, "WHY is there no power?! I'm supposed to set up for this party. HOW am I supposed to do that WHEN I CAN'T SEE WHAT I'M DOING?!" I was a little stunned and told her that, per the owner's policy, she couldn’t be in the building until the coach arrived.
Her face went purple. She yelled, "HOW DARE YOU TELL ME WHAT I CAN AND CAN NOT DO! THE OWNER SAID I COULD BE HERE WHENEVER I WANTED. I WON'T TAKE THIS GARBAGE FROM SOME STUPID KID!" I said, "Fine, but your power won't be on for another 45 minutes. You might as well go wait in your car until the coach gets here."
She stomped off, tried to slam the door, and proceeded to try and call the owner. When the coach finally arrived, I told her what had happened and how she acted towards me. I also left a note for the owner and called her to inform her. I left the gym and went home for the night. The following day, I went in to get paid. The owner pulled me aside and told me I did everything right in that situation. Then I found out the whole story.
I found out that not only was that lady completely nasty to the coach as well, but that she didn't pay for the party, and she stayed a full hour longer than what was rented. Then, I got the best news possible. When the parents were all inside, her dog had gotten into the cake that was in her car and ate about half of it. Her reaction was deranged.
She then said, "Oh, we can still use it. We'll just cut around the parts the dog ate." 40 minutes later, she came running back into the gym, grabbed a bunch of paper towels, and returned to her car. Within the time that she brought the cake inside to the time she went back out, her dog had pooped and puked EVERYWHERE in her car—on the seats, floors, armrests, even the dashboard. This car was COVERED in poo and vomit.
67. Another Karen Bites The Dust
My mother is a reformed Karen. In fairness, she was never particularly bad. But, when I was young, if we went to a restaurant and something was poorly made, she would call in the waitstaff and be very indignant and complain. She's now completely swapped sides. She's particularly kind to waitstaff. If something is wrong and does need to be raised, she'll be polite about it.
How did it happen? Well, it started with me being honest and saying her behavior was making me not want to go out to dinner with her. Then, she saw a member of her family do something similar: It turns out it was an acquired trait from her upbringing. She later recognized that he was being unpleasant and had ruined our night. She completely changed her tune after that and is more polite than normal.
Nowadays, if things are good, she will go out of her way to leave compliments.
68. Taking Me For A Ride
I'm a single parent, and I have a beautiful girl who is turning five in August. The past year I have been fighting with the ex that tried to keep my kid away from me. Lawyers aren't cheap, and being single doesn't exactly help with my finances. A couple of months ago, I won the lawsuit and I finally got to have my kid at my home again.
For the past few weeks she was saying she wanted a bicycle, but as I was still recovering from the lawsuit bills, I wasn't able to afford it. This past week, I got my summer bonus which finally gave me the financial boost I needed. So yesterday I finally was able to buy my little girl her bike she wanted so badly. I enjoyed my time with her riding our bikes, but then it was getting time for dinner, which I still had to make.
So we head back home and park the bikes in the backyard. We go inside and I start making dinner. After about 10 minutes, I spot movement in the corner of my eye through the kitchen window—and my heart dropped. I see this kid just casually strolling by with the brand new bike I just got today. I ran to the front door, hoping I'd catch him before he rides away.
I was lucky I did. I yanked the bike out of his hands, and freaked out to him, saying it was mine and he had no right to just walk into other people's back yards to take things. I was so mad. I forced him to get off my property, and set the bike inside my front hallway, thinking it's over. Boy, was I wrong. After comforting my little girl, I return to the kitchen to continue making dinner.
15 minutes later, the doorbell rings. It's the kid and his Evil Mother. EM: You give my boy this bike back! He found it! It's his! Me: He "found" it in MY backyard! I got it for my MY kid today! You should try teaching your kid some manners, he shouldn't trespass on other people's property to take their things. EM: Don't tell me how to raise my kid! Give me the bike back or I'm calling the authorities!
Me: (laughs) Call them! And I slam the door in her face. By this point, my kid is crying her eyes out, and I get to comfort her again, as she's thinking she's losing her brand new bike. Her sobbing finally over, I try continuing to make dinner, yet again. Preparation's done, I'm about to put it all on the stove, doorbell. I flip out, storm to the door, violently open it, and get ready to just explode into her face.
Guess what, she actually called the authorities. I instantly calm down when I see it's them and invite one of the two officers inside while the other stays with the evil woman. I explain the situation and show him the box the bike came in, along with the receipt that has my name on it. He shrugs and apologized for the inconvenience, and assured me I won't be bothered again.
I let him out and close the door with a smug smile on my face. I check the front window to see what's happening, and I see her go into a full tantrum. It ends with her in handcuffs and in the backseat of the patrol car. Bye Felicia! Don't know what happened to her, and I don't care. I finally finished dinner, and my kid still has her bike. That's all that matters to me.
69. Karen And Proud Of It
My mom is a Karen. She always snaps her fingers at waiters when she needs something. I follow her around apologizing—and leaving big tips—in the wake of her terrible behavior. One time, when my brother’s boss wouldn’t give him a full week off for Christmas, my mom called his boss to explain that we were doing family photos and that he needed the time off.
The crazy part is how old my brother was when this happened. He was freaking 26. It is extremely frustrating to be around her because she is so unaware. She is very proud of her ability to “make things happen” and she views her Karenness as the desired personality trait.
70. Here’s To You
Now, for a bit of context, last weekend was liberation day in Holland, and many cities were having festivals to celebrate. Most of these festivals have free entrance, so they tend to crack down on people bringing their own food and drinks, to increase profits from beverage sales. A friend of mine lives within the area where the festival is taking place though, so usually we drop our booze at his place and retrieve it during the festival.
Since it didn't seem like a terrific idea to walk around with a bottle of JD, I mixed it into a 1L Coca Cola Vanilla bottle with just enough coke that it looked like coke, and went onto the festival grounds. While walking around with the bottle of “coke,” I feel a tap on my shoulder. Festival etiquette is to move over to the side to let somebody pass, after which I move along.
I suddenly feel a hand grabbing my shoulder and trying to pull me back, so I turn around, and I'm faced with a typical Karen. Her: Where'd you get that? pointing at the bottle Me: Brought it from home. Her: Can my kid have some? Me, not wanting everybody to know I had booze on me: They sell coke over there, you can buy your kid a fresh, cold one. Her: They don't sell vanilla coke there, and he doesn't like the regular one. He wants yours. holds out hand
Me: If he doesn't like the regular one, I'm pretty sure he won't like this any better... Meanwhile, the kid has started squealing about how he's thirsty and “wants THAT one,” and the mother starts giving me a demanding stare. Me: ...Okay lady, I'm going to be honest with you. Half of this bottle is Jack Daniels, and I don't think it's a good idea to give it to the kid. Her response made me want to scream.
Her: You're lying! You just made that up so you wouldn't have to share with my baby! Now give it to me! While I turn away in an attempt to disappear into the crowd, the kid grabs the bottle with both hands, wrenches it from my hand, and makes a run for it, his mom in tow. I follow them, and I find them just in time to see the kid take a few massive swigs from the bottle.
After, this he starts violently throwing up almost immediately. Figuring the best move for me would be to not further pursue the now vomit-covered bottle of Jack and coke, I decided to head over to my friend’s and mix a new one. In passing, I throw the mom a “Told you” and make my way into the crowds. Within seconds, she charges me and starts attempting to take a swing at me.
“YOU POISONED MY BABY!!! SECURITY!!!” We're separated by bystanders, and a stallholder gets security, who questions both me and the woman. Her: He gave my baby this bottle of poison and told him it was coke! I want him detained. Guard: Sir, what's in this bottle? Me: A premixed JD and coke, somewhat on the generous side with the JD.
Guard: And why did you give that to a kid? Me: I didn't, sir. I was mostly planning on getting smashed myself, to be fair. They thought it was coke, wouldn't believe me when I told them it was booze and snatched the bottle from me. What you're seeing here is just the result of the kid taking a drink before I was able to stop him.
At this point, a bystander chimed in, confirming that he saw the kid snatch the bottle from my hand, although he hadn't heard the conversation. Security tells the mom to not pull that ridiculous stuff again and to take her still crying kid to the first-aid post. He then instructs me to be more careful with the next batch I'm “inevitably about to make".
71. Tell The Truth
I was in a chain beauty store that has a hair salon in the back. I was looking at a display that happened to be right next to the salon, and I overheard the woman in the chair finishing up with the stylist. I was there for a few minutes, so I heard a decent portion of their conversation. A little while later, I got in line to pay and recognized the woman in front of me as the woman from the salon.
There was only one cashier working, and she was currently helping someone else. When they finished and the cashier called her over, the woman dropped her items on the counter and handed the cashier a coupon. Cashier (C): “I’m sorry ma’am, but this coupon can’t be applied to the items you’re purchasing". Salon Lady (SL): “What do you mean?”
C: “There are some restrictions to what this coupon can be used towards. They’re listed down at the bottom of the coupon here,” and she attempted to show her. SL: “That’s absolutely ridiculous. I’ve used coupons on these items before. I buy them all the time". C: “I’m sorry ma’am. The previous coupons you used may have had different restrictions, however, this one specifically states that it cannot be used on these items. The coupon actually mentions this brand by name in the restrictions".
SL then began screaming at the cashier about her horrible customer service and the fact that last month they wouldn’t give her a free birthday gift even though she’s been a rewards member for over 10 years just because she tried to redeem it two months after her birthday. She demanded the number for corporate and the cashier’s name. The cashier started to write down the number.
SL: “No, tell it to me right now. I’m going to call them right now to make sure you aren’t lying to me!” She pulled out her phone and the cashier told her the number and her name. SL proceeded to dial and stand at the register. C: “Ma’am, if you could just step to the side so I can ring up the other customers...” SL: “NO! YOU WILL FINISH MY TRANSACTION! I AM GOING TO TELL CORPORATE HOW HORRIBLY YOU’RE TREATING ME AND THEY WILL COMmAND YOU TO HONOR MY COUPON AND GIVE ME MY BIRTHDAY GIFT!”
The cashier attempted to flag down another employee and drew even more screams from SL for “attempting to leave". By this time, the manager had overheard the yelling and come over, but SL refused to speak to her, refused to let the cashier open another register, and refused to move from where she was standing. She stood at the register fake crying to the rep on the phone.
It was total lies, all about how she came in to get a haircut and it turned out horribly and the stylist refused to fix it and how her mother was dying in the hospital and she just wanted to see her one last time and now she looks awful and the employees in the store were treating her horribly and she couldn’t believe how such a loyal customer was being mistreated and publicly humiliated “all over a free birthday gift".
The manager, having no other option, opened up another register to try to move through the massive line that had backed up and called me over. At the end of my transaction, I said, “Thank you. I would also like the number to corporate, your name, and that employee’s name, so that I can tell them how calmly and politely you attempted to deal with this completely irrational woman. I was here for the whole thing, including when she told the stylist she liked her hair and her mother had been released from the hospital last week. Hopefully I can counteract whatever damage she may be doing".
The manager thanked me and gave me the number and their names. I got in my car and called, telling the rep who answered the entire story and insisting that the cashier and manager did nothing wrong and that the woman was lying to get what she wanted. She thanked me and said she would make sure that my message got to where it needed to go. I sure hope it did.
72. Winner Winner Chicken Dinner
I worked at a fried chicken place. A lady called and said that her daughter was going to order. Her daughter sounded about five years old and ordered 500 pieces of chicken. I said okay, laughing. The mom got on and asked how long. I told her that her daughter just ordered $1,000 in food, and I asked her, “Does she really want that”?
The lady went nuts screaming at me, asking if I think her daughter is dumb. Me: "So you want 500 pieces of chicken”? Her: "My girl wants what she wants, make it and stop making fun of her". Me: “It is going to be at least an hour and $1,000 dollars". She said something about not making fun of her and her daughter and asked why I thought I was better than them.
She told me to place the order. She showed up ten minutes later, looking for her chicken. I explained to the manager about the call, and she freaked out when the cashier told her it was over $1,000. The lady refused to tell us how much chicken she really wanted while the little girl stood there screaming she wanted 500 chickens.
73. At The Tipping Point
My mom is a Karen. She was always finding coupons for restaurants, and that decided where we would eat. My family was not poor. One day when I was about 15, she and I had lunch at a Tex-Mex place with a buy one get one coupon deal. The total bill ended up being around $11. My mom tipped $1. Oh, but she got what was coming to her.
The server ran out to the parking lot and handed it back to her saying, "You must need this more than me".
74. Leave It Well Enough Alone
For the past few months, I've suspected that my upstairs neighbor has been taking some of my mail. I buy a lot of things online like books and craft supplies and every now and then there's been small things that were meant to arrive on a certain day that never did. One day, I caught her wandering around my front door. When I asked her what she was doing she said "Oh, I was looking for something I think I dropped into your yard”.
I got surveillance cameras installed a while ago, which were not noticeable to my neighbors. The camera that's pointed at my front door isn't visible from the driveway. So here comes the trap. I purchased a few postage boxes to set up for her. The first one was a glitter bomb. I set up the box to make sure she would get glitter to the face as soon as she opened it.
I packed it to make it look like a postage parcel, then sat it at my front door. 20 minutes later I saw her walking to my front door. She looked around then picked up the box and walked away. My only regret is that I didn't get to see her reaction when she got a face full of glitter. I haven't noticed any other mail going missing after that, but she will regret it if she does it again.
Sources: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17,
