There are always moments where you give advice—perhaps because you know more, or perhaps just because you have common sense—and someone refuses to listen. Usually, this leaves a bitter taste in our mouths as we walk away. But sometimes, we get a moment of vindication. It turns out that our advice was right—and we hate to say it, but we told you so.
1. Bad Bike Days
I had a friend who always rode his BMX bike with his headphones in, with the volume so loud that he couldn't hear anything. There had been multiple occasions where he couldn't hear us shouting things like "car" or "don't go" and almost hurt us or himself. One time he crashed into me after I fell, and I flipped out and told him that one of these days he was going to really hurt someone or himself.
A week later he rode directly out of a friend's driveway and got blindsided by a car. He was fine, save some cuts and bruises, but his bike was destroyed and he broke her windshield. Her lawyer basically proved it was his fault and he had to pay for the whole thing. I told you, you idiot.
2. Second Base Success
My little dog will try to stick her tongue in your mouth. I don’t know why she does it, but it is some kind of obsession with her. She’s stealthy. She’s patient. She’s not messing around. She will look positively adorable and innocent while she waits for the perfect opportunity to tongue-punch your uvula. I try to warn people, but they never take me seriously.
I took her to the vet for her new puppy check up, and warned the vet tech this dog was going try to go to first base with him. Me: “Be careful. She will try to stick her tongue in your mouth.” Vet Tech: “No, she won’t. Don’t worry. I know what I’m doing.” Me: “I’m serious. She will wait until you let your guard down, and then her whole tongue is in your mouth.”
The Vet Tech sighs, and then snaps at me: “Look, this is my job and I’ve been doing this a long ppptttthhhtt SHE GOT ME!” Me: I told you.
3. The Dramatic Sick Person
My wife's mother always told her she was being overly dramatic and making it up that her periods hurt. Everybody's period hurts, stop whining, etc. After we got married, I encouraged my wife to see an actual doctor. She was IMMEDIATELY diagnosed with endometriosis. We both felt satisfied to report back to her mother that no, she was not overly dramatic. She had needed help.
4. Frog Shenanigans
My aunt gave me pet frogs when I was 13. I didn’t ask for them and had no clue about their care aside from the paper from the pet store which I know can be sketchy, so I did my own research, starting with how to gender them. I found out pretty quickly that one of them was female and my parents REFUSED to believe me no matter what I did because "ThE PEt StORe SAiD..."
Summertime rolled around. Frog mating season! I woke up to the two frogs piggybacking around the tank and laying eggs all through the water. The biggest "I told you so" of my childhood. I was completely enraged that they'd dismissed me completely despite having done none of their own research. They laid eggs every summer until they crossed the rainbow bridge and I considered my dad having to clean it as karma.
5. Salt in the Wound
I have a simple but excellent story. There was a kid in primary school who loved to prove everyone wrong. Once he tried to prove that rubbing salt in an open wound wouldn’t hurt. I advised him against it, and he dismissed me. Big. Mistake. This idiot put salt in on a scrape in his knee. He immediately screamed and was crying so hard he had to go to the nurse's office.
6. Ex, Lies and Rock and Roll
My ex, with whom I was still friends, started dating this girl who used to be one of my friends. I got over it fast but I did warn him about her. I knew enough of her character to be suspicious of the pairing, especially since they were going to be in a long distance relationship. He didn’t listen to me, and after a year it turned out that she was jealous, manipulative, obsessive.
Near the end of the relationship, she was even cheating on him. That was easily the most satisfying “I told you so” I’ve ever said.
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7. Couch Dreams
I went over to a friend's house in college and her dad was sleeping on the couch. She said, "Oh yeah, he's been sleeping there for like a year; he has a bad back." I was confused: My mom has a bad back and she saved up and bought a new mattress rather than sleep apart from my dad. I suggested that perhaps her dad had been kicked out of the bedroom. She didn't believe me. Two months later, it came out her dad was cheating on her mom. The only person who was surprised about it was my friend.
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8. Insect Issues
When I was around 9 or so, I slept on the floor. At about 2 in the morning, I awake to an ear-shattering flutter/rumble in my right ear. I run to my parents' room, they run me to the emergency room. Somehow, I know right away that it's an insect - something about the quality of the sound tells me exactly what is going on inside my ear canal.
Understandably, my parents are skeptical, and decide it's probably a particularly nasty ear infection. The doctor agrees with my folks and pulls out a scope to confirm his suspicions. He peers into my ear canal and announces that it's just as he suspected: A nasty ear infection is to blame. Then the most disgusting thing happens.
The insect that has been dormant for the past five minutes decides that the light from the scope is cause for alarm and proceeds to attempt flight. The doctor recoils in horror, drops the scope, crying "Holy God! It moved!" 20 minutes and a bottle of mineral oil later, the bug (a large, black beetle) is safely evacuated to a nearby wastebasket.
The doctor apologized profusely for his momentary lapse in professionalism and I gloated for a solid week.
9. It’s Nuts!
I told my mum that I felt sick after accidentally eating her Crunchy Nut cereal and that I was worried I was allergic to nuts. She told me that she allergy tested me as a baby and I was not allergic to anything. I told her that allergies can change and asked for a second allergy test. She told me I was overreacting. But then a few years later, I ate Thai food with peanuts.
I vomited and had a swollen throat. My roommates were so worried that they offered to take me to ER but I declined. I told my mum about it once I had recovered. She still didn’t believe me and kept saying, “nut allergies don’t just develop!” Last year, I ate some chicken. I only had one bite before my boyfriend realized it had peanut butter in the sauce.
He forbade me from having another bite. My lips swelled up and my stomach was so badly affected that I had to stay in bed for the night. After that, my mum finally believed me. It was a long haul!
10. Female Problems
I was eight months pregnant when I started having contractions. I went to my obstetrician and told them that something was wrong. They tested me for hours. According to them? Absolutely no problems! But I just knew that something wasn't right. I refused to leave and the doctor agreed to one last test. Boom: It showed that my baby’s heartbeat was weakening.
Ten minutes later, they wheeled me into the operating room. My daughter was born with no heartbeat and had CPR done for two and a half minutes before she was resuscitated. I looked at that doctor and said I told you something was wrong. My precious girl is eight years old now and perfectly healthy.
11. Cold, But Not Too Cold
I used to work at Starbucks. A total Karen of a customer came in and ordered a cold drink, but without ice. I warned them that the drink would only be as cold as the ingredients, and thus the drink would be room temperature within a few minutes. They said that was fine. I made the drink, handed it off, and guess what happened?
The customer came back to the counter five minutes later and said “My drink isn’t cold!” Yeah, I told you so!
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12. Tree Thoughts
In High School, my English teacher had us read a poem about a tree. She was really into finding "symbolism" in poetry and asked us to analyze the poem. I said, "It’s about a tree." She didn’t like that answer. She thought that the roots symbolized origins, and the trunk symbolized common beginning, the branches of humanity, etc.
I got a "D" on the assignment. A few months later I found a literary journal that featured an interview with the poet. They asked him about the symbolism in his poem, and he replied, "It’s about a tree." I sent her the literary journal. She changed my grade.
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13. Pest Vindication
When I was young and still living with my parents, there were a lot of squirrels in our neighborhood. One morning, I was pulling weeds in the front yard when I heard the sounds of squirrels moving around in our porch ceiling, just under our attic. I told my dad immediately. My dad told me that I was just hearing squirrels on the top of the roof and there was nothing to worry about.
This happened a few more times over the summer but each time my parents said the squirrels couldn’t possibly in the attic. Cut to several months later, during a peaceful Sunday morning breakfast, when what can only be described as a ball of loud, angry squirrels THUMPED down in between the walls of our kitchen.
We listened to them trying to climb back up and squabbling with each other for hours until a pest control guy came. The pest control guy got all of the squirrels out, confirming that they had entered through a hole on the roof and set up a nest in the attic, which fell into the cavity between the walls. All the squirrels were safely removed and relocated outside. I’ve never felt so vindicated in my life.
14. Egg Salad Blues
"You really shouldn't eat egg salad from the gas station," I told my husband. "But I like egg salad. You can't mess up egg salad," he said confidently. I shrugged. "Okay, but somewhere between six and twelve hours later you're going to regret it." He snorted, shook his head, and went to buy the egg salad. Six hours later, he regretted it.
15. Next Door Scandal
We had a new family move in next door several years ago and caught "domestic abuse” vibes immediately. She wouldn't look at anyone, smile, looked like a zombie. The husband tried interacting with other neighbors and seemed to be doing a good job pretending he wasn't an abusive person. One day, I ran into one of the neighbors and we started talking about the newbies on the block. My neighbor didn't seem too concerned, but I just couldn't shake the feeling that guy was bad news.
Fast forward three months: My wife and I were woken up by some loud banging and screaming. As she called the authorities, I grabbed my firearm to go see what was going on. Next thing I see is the neighbor's wife running out of their front door, unclothed and bloody, pleading for help. I ended up holding the man at gunpoint until the authorities arrived 10 minutes later.
Turns out he had beaten her so bad he had broken several bones in her face, two fingers, and she had deep bruising on her throat from trying to choke her. The next morning, I said "I told you so" to anyone who would listen.
16. Bad Car Advice
My mom and I were driving out of state someplace when her 79' Bronco started to hesitate and almost stall. I told her it the fuel filter was probably blocked, but as far as she was concerned, I was a just teen who didn't know anything, so she pulled into some hick-garage. They guy gave her some story about it probably being a "congested catalytic converter."
He cleaned it out while we had to wait an hour or so, charged her $100+ bucks (this was in the 80's, so that was a lot of money), and sent us on our way. About an hour down the road....the same thing happened. She pulled into another place. This time I spoke up about the fuel filter. The mechanic agreed, popped off the air-cleaner, took off the fuel-filter, and tried to blow into it.
Clogged. He grabbed a new one, put it on in like two minutes, charged us something like $20, and we had no problems after that. Vindicated!
17. Rush-Order Divorce
I told my brother once that he should probably date his girlfriend longer than a year before proposing. Two months after the wedding she said she wasn't ready to be married and divorced him. It took him a long time to be ready for me to say “I told you so,” but it was worth it.
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18. Heart Problems
I was 33 years old and otherwise perfectly healthy. But I could not walk across the living room without feeling sick, like I was going to pass out and/or throw up. I went to the E.R. They said I was fine. Then one day I vomited and passed out. I went to the E.R. again. They said I was fine. I was silly, and trusted them.
One morning I passed out in the bathroom and hit my face on the bathtub, where my wife found me unconscious and bleeding. We went to the E.R. They continued to say I was fine. It seriously got to the point where I was convinced it was psychosomatic. But this time my wife wouldn’t let us leave. She clearly told the doc we weren't going home.
They needed to transfer me to another hospital, three hours away, where they have a specialized heart center. I needed to be checked out, and she was not going to take “he’s fine” for an answer. We got to the new hospital. They ran a test to see the pressure of my heart, like, how effectively it's pumping blood. Turns out it sucks... really bad. Worryingly bad!!
I had a congenial heart defect. I was immediately put on a transplant list. A month later got a new heart. That’s how bad it was! I knew I was sick! And yet those E.R. doctors almost had me convinced I was exaggerating my symptoms. I told them so. We told them so. I’m so glad we fought them. It’s been almost two years post-transplant with zero problems.
19. Fire Warning
I warned my girlfriend that when drilling in concrete, the drillbit can get fairly warm. We were mounting a shelf and I had just finished a 6mm hole with the impact drill. She responded with "But, like, how warm?" while reaching for drillbit and immediately got a fairly severe burn. The only thing I got out before she went for the cold water was a "I just said..."
Oh, but it got worse. When she came back, she reached for the drill and asked: "It's cold now right?" and then immediately burned herself again on the bit.
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20. Anger Management
When I was in 3rd grade I begged my mom to switch teachers. My teacher was such a mean and negative person. She thought I was overreacting because I hadn’t had a male teacher before. He got fired the next year for grabbing a girl and slamming her on a desk in anger. My mom actually apologized for not believing me.
21. Olympic Coke
My mom is obsessed with soda. One day she came home with some old unopened coke bottles from the 1998 Olympics she got from a yard sale. I was like cool, decorations! No, she intended to drink them. I told her, multiple times, that drinking 20-year-old pop was a horrible idea. But my mom was convinced that coke can’t go bad. All that sugar! All those chemicals! There's no way it could be rotten. Oh, how wrong she was...
I came home the next day and saw that there was one bottle missing. I asked my mom where it went. She just looked at me and muttered that I was right about not drinking it. I told you so was said many times that day.
22. Soft Girls Don’t Play Softball
I got hit in the face with a softball when I was 8. I told my mother that it really hurt and that I thought it was broken. But since I wasn't crying enough, she thought that it must be OK and ice would be sufficient. Eight entire years later, I was at the doctor's office with my mother when he asked when I had broken my nose. My mother was horrified.
23. Extended Vacation Joy
My most recent “I told you so” moment was when I told my wife we needed to cut our vacation short because of COVID. Then we came into close contact with a carrier, got put into isolation, our flights back got cancelled and the country where we live closed its borders. So, we are currently stuck in a foreign country and have no idea when we'll be able to go back home. Joy.
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24. Listen More
I tried to tell my mother about what later was diagnosed as a rare form of epilepsy when I was around eight years old. I wish she had listened, but she waved it off like she did with everything I told her. Fast forward to when I was 30 years old. I admitted myself to the hospital because I felt funny. I ended up having an enormous seizure right there in the emergency room.
After I recovered, I couldn’t help myself. I looked my mom right in the eye and told her I knew I was right all these years. She mumbled a half-hearted apology, but I’m still angry. She said she “didn’t know what to do at the time.” I felt like screaming: You could’ve taken me to the doctor!!! Ugh.
25. Weekend Away
This is from over a decade and I still feel satisfied about it. There was a girl in my Girl Scout troop that was constantly being mean to me, just not in front of our troop mates. No one believed me but soon enough, they'd learn I was right in the most brutal way possible when we all went on a weekend trip to an amusement park.
That weekend, this girl was an absolute nightmare. She threw a fit when she didn't get what she wanted. She started yelling at people how they ruined her trip and she was the troop leader's daughter so she should be in charge. Eventually she just cried for hours asking the other girls why they were being so mean. I laughed the entire time.
26. Projectile Defenses
In third grade, we were doing quiet small group work when I suddenly felt sick to my stomach, which was very unusual for me. So, I got up, walked over to my teacher’s desk and told her I thought I was going to throw up. She said “you’ll be fine, sit back down.” I walked back to my little row of desks, turned to the right, and projectile vomited all over the girl next to me.
I think I literally finished and said “I TOLD YOU SO.” Also, sorry for yacking on you, Elaina from third grade.
27. Compass Points
When I was in elementary school, a teacher taught us compass directions, like N, W, NW etc. I causally remarked; "Then there's NbW, NNW and NWbN." “What?” She asked, confused. That started an argument where she said I was making those up and to stop disrupting class. I talked to my father who was in the air force. He sent me to her next class with a book explaining the 32-point compass. Vindicated!
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28. Salmon(ella)
Last year, I told my housemate the salmon he just bought from the shop smelt really bad and he shouldn't eat it. Of course, he’s dismissive and rude and says, "I just bought it there's nothing wrong with it." Cue being woken up in the early hours by said housemate vomiting his guts up with foodborne illness. I told you, Tim!
29. Fake Gamer Guy
When I was 14, I was hanging out with a guy after school. Two of his friends randomly decided to invite themselves, and started talking about a FPS video game they all enjoyed. I mentioned how the new one coming out had amazing graphics because my dad was planning on going to the midnight release. One of the friends said, "There’s no new game coming out, stop trying to pretend to be a gamer." I argued there was, he argued there wasn’t, so I came up with a brilliant plan.
I said we could settle it once and for all by going to the mall and asking at then GameStop. Lo and behold, when we got to the store, there was an enormous cardboard cutout advertising the game. The guy’s face dropped. It was so beautiful.
30. Handwriting Incidents
There was a substitute teacher at my school who offered to do "handwriting analyses" to pass the time. All the girls loved him. I had bad vibes from him from day one but finally I gave him my sample of handwriting. He started with "Oh honey, you're in real trouble aren't you?" I was confused. I wasn't. I had a fine home life.
I told him so and then he put his hand on my shoulder and said "You can tell me anything" and looked deep into my eyes. It made me VERY uncomfortable. I told my friends I did not like him but they couldn't understand why. A few years later, I learned the awful truth. This guy got put away as a pedophile. The newspaper article went in to detail about how he used hand writing analysis to prey on vulnerable kids, mostly girls.
31. Contraband Checks
We were camping in a state park. I kept telling my friends to keep their voices down, or the rangers would come. Since we had some contraband, we didn’t want any extra scrutiny. Just as one of my friends was saying I'm overreacting, park rangers walked up to our fire and started chastising us. I laughed.
32. Brace Dreams
I was 16 when I first told my parents I wanted braces. Mom said, “you don’t need braces.” I went to the dentist, and the dentist told me I needed braces. My mom still disagreed, saying the dentist was just trying to make money off my teeth, which she insisted were "Fine." Fast forward many years. I’m 27 now and I've been struggling with brutal migraines for years.
When I went to the dentist for a routine cleaning, he looked at my teeth and said, “Have you considered braces? You should really think about them. Realigning your jaw will help with your migraines and it’ll fix your overlapping teeth.” I was furious, and immediately called up my mom. I was right! All along! I should have gotten braces! Extremely unfair.
33. Local Cues
About five years ago, during the protests in Turkey, I was sitting outside at a back-street cafe in Istanbul (where I live) having a drink. At the table behind me, another male expat was chatting to two 20-something Turkish women telling them about his brave exploits. Everyone at the cafe was keeping an eye on a group of riot officers at the end of the small street.
When they started to put their helmets on, I knew it was time to go indoors. I turned to the three of them behind me and politely suggested they do the same. The guy said something like, no, it’s ok...we’re safe here. He should have listened to me. About five seconds later, the whole street was filled with teargas canisters and fireworks being shot from a group who had been waiting around a corner.
After they ran inside, he asked a waiter to get his drink from the table outside.
34. Rainy Day Friend
My sister had a horrible narcissistic "friend." This girl never gave a hoot about my sister’s life. She only wanted the attention on her. She was super possessive of my sister. She was jealous of my sister’s boyfriend and would say my sister should kick him out so she could move in. I told her the friend was bad news but did she listen? Of course not.
Two weeks ago, my sister had to terminate her pregnancy due to complications. She called up her narcissistic friend to talk about it, expecting sympathy. Nope! Her response was so cruel. She told my sister to “get over it” and instead listen to HER “real” problems. My sister had a light-bulb moment, and realized. Her friend was a mean person, and not a good friend! Definitely told you so, sis.
35. Inconvenient Truths
My pregnant wife and I were staying in a well-known hotel in Killarney (Kerry, Ireland). There was a second story being built onto an existing extension, visible from our window. It was being built by a huge well-known contractor. I noticed something about the build that I thought was very unsafe and reported it to management.
I'm not a builder or a civil engineer so they didn't take much notice. I then went to the building foreman and told him of my concerns. He assured me everything was safe. I wasn't convinced and they continued with construction. I went back to management, but it was obvious they considered me nothing more than an inconvenience.
To cut a long story short, within hours a very large portion of the new wall collapsed, missing a bus full of tourists by a few yards. I got my "I told you" moment, but they never acknowledged their fault or mistake.
36. Miscommunication
When I came home from high school once, my mother told me that my grandmother was having chest pains, so my mom was going over to "sit with her for a bit." Confused, I asked “by 'sit with her' you mean call an ambulance, right?” Apparently not. The next day, my mom couldn’t get ahold of my grandmother. She went over there to check on her. No prizes for guessing what she found.
37. Best Served Cold
I had an art teacher once who told me cartooning was not “true art” and that no one took cartoonists seriously. A few years later, I was teaching an animation class in the local art museum for grades k-12. One day at work, I received the most satisfying call of my life. It was from my old art teacher. He wondered if he could have his classes come down and take part in the studio. Getting to re-introduce myself as a successful artist and cartoonist was the ultimate "I told you so."
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38. Picture That!
My mother had a friend that nobody liked, but everyone felt bad for. She was a horrible person, and I hated her. I always warned my mom that she would backstab us one day. They had occasional arguments, but always made up. She would talk bad about me in particular, behind my parents back. My mother’s friend’s kids were ALSO huge liars.
One day, my mom found out that they had accused my younger brother (not even a teen yet) of asking their daughter for some risqué pictures. It was totally ridiculous, and they could offer absolutely no evidence even though he supposedly asked over text. My mother was so furious. I looked at her and said "I told you so!" We don't talk to them anymore.
39. Leaving Litter
Dad leaves his stinky shoes on the balcony next to the kitty litter. I told him not to because the cat will smell them and puke in the shoes. He told me to mind my own business. One morning, the cat pooped in his shoes. I definitely said I told you so.
40. Too Old
One of my good friends dated a much older guy when she was sixteen. I knew it wasn’t a good idea, and told her. She didn’t listen to me. Then he asked her to help him find a job. And help him pay rent. And help him pay for contraband. She finally dumped him, calling him out for everything. Well I bet you wish you listened to me now don't you?
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41. Driving Me Wild
During my driver’s ed test, the examiner told me to continue backing up. I looked at him, and then at the huge snowbank inches from the back bumper of my car. I said, “Sir, I’m going to hit that snowbank if I do that.” He disagreed. So I proved him wrong in the best way ever. I backed into it and just looked at him in the post-crunch silence. He was embarrassed, and I got my license anyway!
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42. When Life Gives You Lemons…
One day, when I was a little kid, I came home from school the urge to plant a tree. So I took a lemon from the kitchen counter, cut it open, and extracted a couple seeds. My mom asked me what I was planning to do, and said, "That'll never work! Lemon trees grow in the tropics, and besides, these lemons are genetically modified!"
More than eight years later, a huge lemon tree sits in the corner of my kitchen. I always point it out to her whenever my mom comes over.
43. Foresight for the Ages
On Monday, in the second week of March, I went to my boss and said we needed to postpone our upcoming event because of the state of the world. She wanted me to ramp up advertising. I said I thought it might be a waste of resources, and inappropriate considering large gatherings were starting to be banned.
She said, "No, it's in three weeks, this whole thing will all be cleared up by then." That Friday they announced we were sheltering in place. We are still sheltering in place.
I told you so, Nancy.
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44. Son Swoon
I stood on my rooftop for a few hours under a bright sun. I told myself "you better watch it or else you'll faint." I went inside my house and while climbing down the stairs, my head spun and I fell down. My told you so moment happened with me.
45. Explosive Coffee
I told my friend not to use a drinking glass to make coffee in, because the glass was not tempered and would probably shatter. They looked at me like I was an idiot, then while filling the glass said "I've done this a hundred times..." shatter. Glass shards and boiling water everywhere.
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46. Too Little, Too Late
My roommate had a cat for years, and when I moved in her boyfriend had a dog too. They got along swimmingly. They decided to get another dog they saw on Craigslist, and within 2 hours of finding the post, the dog was in our house. The new dog was a border collie/Australian Shephard mix.
The cat then disappeared for two weeks, hiding in the couch and refusing to come out. On New Year’s Eve, my roommates were gone. I heard growling from the kitchen. The new dog had pinned the cat in the corner, so I made the dog leave so the cat could escape. I told them that it wasn't a good idea for the new dog to be here.
Their solution? Just making the cat live in a single room for six straight months while the new dog had free reign of the rest of the house. One day I get a call from my roomies, and apparently the cat tore through the window screen and was in the backyard. They came home and let the dogs out.
Apparently the cat put up a major fight, because the collie mix was covered in scratches, but the dog ultimately won. They found the poor kitty laying there dead in the backyard a few minutes later. The boyfriend came up to me, and said, 'you were right.' It was not something I wanted to be right about.
RIP that cat :(
47. Finally!
The best I told you so moment in my life was when my mom told me that my brother had been hospitalized for poor mental health. I had been trying for years to get him health insurance and mental health care because we experienced childhood trauma. She never listened. Now he is 19 years old and can't keep a job. Struggles with addiction. Has awful mental health. I have been telling her for years to help him. Hopefully this hospitalization will allow him to change and grow, just like he deserves. I’m glad my mom finally listened.
48. Tax Problems!
When I was in the US Navy, I did work as a tax preparer through a program being offered on base. It allowed military members to have their taxes prepared for free. It was my second consecutive year working on this and I was the only one out of the four assigned preparers at the tax center who had any prior experience.
We go through the training and set up the tax center. We go over the process for how everything runs. The highest rank was an E-6. I pointed out that we needed to have everyone sign a particular form that wasn't included but the E-6 completely blew me off and was basically just like "What? No we don't." I reminded him that I did this last year.
I strongly believed everyone would need to sign this form. Nevertheless, I was brushed aside like the piece of trash E-4 I was and that was that. So the tax year came to a close and we were all but finished with that assignment. For me, my enlistment was coming to an end and I had begun processing out – exciting!
There's a time period where you're released from your normal command so that you can go around gathering and turning in everything you need. That's what I was doing when one day I got a call from a frantic E-6 and you'll NEVER guess why! That's right. The form I had declared needed to be signed did, in fact, need to be signed.
Now they had to call everyone whose taxes we filed and have them come back in to sign it. He needed me to come in and help with that. He called and left a LOT of voicemails saying so. Unfortunately, I was processing out and had no obligation to do that and so I blew him off the same way he did me. I laughed a lot remembering this story as I wrote it. Thanks for the memories.
49. Bad Vibes
My ex and I stayed friendly after our breakup. He started dating someone new. After he introduced us, he asked me what I thought of her. I had a bad feeling about this girl and told him that he should be careful. The more I got to know her, the more I just had this sense that she’s bad news. He laughed it off, trying to say I was just saying that cause I still had feelings for him. I didn’t.
Few years later, he needs representation because she destroyed his business, his family, stalked and harassed him and even had him under investigation by the FBI. Took him a couple years to clean up the whole mess. I totally said I told you so.
50. Foul Ball
I went to my first baseball practice of the season at 10 years old. I played catcher most of the time, but my father told me: "If they don’t have catchers gear then do not play catcher. You'll get a foul ball in the face." We got there. They had no catcher gear yet. The coach told me to go play catcher. I refused. He got mad and yelled at me to get in there. I refused, repeating again that I needed gear.
So the coach, visibly angry, went in and played catcher. The very first pitch came off the top of the bat and hit him in the eye. He was pouring blood everywhere. He looked at me and before I could even open my mouth he said, "Don’t even say it!"
Sources: Reddit,,
