We all get a little lost sometimes. You know that feeling when you walk into a room and completely forget what you went in for? Well, sometimes that happens in public. And some of those times, the person who is confused gets really mad about it. No one likes being wrong, but that’s not really an excuse for behavior this bad. These Redditors came together to share their stories of people in the wrong place, at the wrong time, with the wrong reaction—and each is wilder than the last.
1. We Are Not The Same
Once, an older guy hurriedly came up to order, roughly placing a coupon onto the counter and saying, "I want this"! I picked it up - it was from KFC. I asked him to clarify his order, but he got annoyed, expecting me to know what he wanted. He pointed at the coupon and condescendingly said, "Well, whatever is on the coupon, obviously"?
I checked again and couldn't help but burst out laughing. I looked at him and said, "Sir, this is McDonald's. This is a KFC coupon. What should I do with it?" He looked at me, utterly confused. He glanced at the menu behind me and surveyed the restaurant. "Aw, nuts," he exclaimed, picking up his piece of paper. I guess this had happened to him before; he took his coupon and left quickly.
2. Do What You Always Do
So, an older dude was pretty upset with me because he wanted to phone in his water bill payment. Working 9-1-1 dispatch for the local government, I guess he got transferred wrong. I politely told him I'd switch him over to the city water department. He just started cussing me out and snapped that he would've called them directly if he wanted to, and I should just take his card number like usual.
I apologized, and explained that I actually can't deal with credit card stuff over here in the 9-1-1 center. Then, he shouts that he didn't actually dial 9-1-1 (it was actually my non-9-1-1 line he'd hit). Finally, super fed up, he said he'll just hand the check to the water delivery guy next time he swings by, and hung up.
3. Doughnut Ask This Of Me!
Back when I worked drive-thru at Burger King, we all wore headsets and also had a speaker in the kitchen. This setup allowed us to hear orders and start making them before they were even keyed in.
Once, this guy rolls up and the teen on the headset says hi. His order? "A dozen chocolate doughnuts". Instantly, everyone freezes and just stares at the girl with the headset.
She goes, "Huh?" The guy repeats, "A dozen chocolate doughnuts". She tells him, "Sorry man, we don't serve doughnuts". The guy goes quiet before asking, "Where am I?" She tells him, "You're at Burger King". Next thing we know, we hear loads of giggles from a woman, probably his wife, in the car with him. They just sit there for a bit, her cracking up non-stop, before they slowly pulled away.
There's a doughnut joint a couple doors down. My best guess is they were aiming for there.
4. Your Property, Your Problem
I spent ages working for the city, doing stuff like road fixes, looking after buildings and clearing the snow. In my final few years there, I was the person answering the calls. One super snowy day, this lady calls me, complaining that her snow hadn't been cleared like everyone else's had. I drove over to check it out - the road was even better than usual.
I called her back to tell her I didn't see a problem. The reply she gave nearly made me lose it. She thought the city was going to shovel her driveway, sidewalk, and deck like her neighbors'. She got this idea from her real estate agent who'd mentioned, pretty casually, that the city does snow removal. I guess in her mind, our small team of 40 people was going to handle snow cleanup for her place and the 10,000+ other properties in the city.
The cherry on top? She refused to get that her neighbors' places were clear because they'd shoveled the snow themselves. So I had to tell her: We only plow the public roads we're responsible for, which is about 50 miles' worth. We don’t manage properties.
5. Oops!
So, I was working at Target and we got this new chick who used to work at Walmart. They put her in charge of the fitting rooms, so she also got to use the store speaker. Few days in, she's ready to make her first big announcement over the loudspeaker. That meant the entire store got to laugh at her mistake.
She started her announcement with "Attention Walmart shoppers..". But it gets better. She caught onto her mistake mid-sentence, and quickly saved it with "...you are in the wrong store". I guess old habits die hard.
6. If I Were A Betting Man
I was with GameStop for a bit. One day, I pick up a call and the guy asks, "Hey, you got video gaming"? Confused, I respond, "Uh-huh...we're GameStop, we got video games”. He clarifies, "No, I mean video gaming”. Still puzzled, I affirm again.
Suddenly, I sense his thrill when he asks, "Really?! Like slots"!? That's when I realize he's on about gambling. "Oh! My bad...we're a video game shop. Like stuff you play on TV", and he huffs, "Oh. That's confusing", before disconnecting. Dude legit assumed GameStop was some casino I guess?
7. See You At Church
When I was 17, I worked as a delivery driver for Dominos Pizza. One day, I made a delivery to a house far into the suburbs. It was my first stop out of three that run. I arrived, rang the doorbell and waited for an answer. A guy in a nightgown, looking like he hadn’t left his home in a while, came to the door. You could tell he wasn't wearing pants but thankfully, nothing bad was on show.
As I handed over the pizzas, I tried to keep the chat light and casual. You know, the usual quick "hey, how's it going?" What I got in return was a heartbreaker. Through tears, he told me that he was alone and struggling mentally, and had called for pizza just to have someone to talk to.
I told him I really wished I could stay and chat, but this was my job and other deliveries were waiting. So, I gave him my church pastor's number, saying the pastor could help him far more than I could.
8. No Patience For Dumb Patients
I'm from Canada and I work as a paramedic. I've had patients who were obsessed with trying to "plead the fifth" when I asked them basic health check questions. Just to set the record straight, we don't have a "Fifth Amendment" in Canada, buddy. You can choose not to say something that could get you in legal trouble, but that doesn't really work when you're having a behind-closed-doors health check.
Interestingly, I once got a call from two people who drank too much and didn't want to walk home on a balmy summer night. They were just being lazy (their words). But the part that takes the cake? They lodged an official complaint against me since I bluntly told them to take a hike (I did say more, but they only picked up on that line).
9. Winning Is Everything
I've spent the last few years as a youth basketball referee. It’s mind-boggling how some coaches lose their cool, especially with young kids. The prime example was a coach—of 10-year-olds at most—getting two technical fouls within two minutes from my colleague.
Dude had to be yanked off the court by his assistant coach, he was so furious! Mostly, I find this kinda funny, I often stop myself from cracking up or telling the coaches to chill, they're kids. This isn't the NBA. But sometimes, I do worry about my and my colleagues' safety.
Look, all referees are doing their job the best we can. So when you're at your kid's game, avoid yelling at us.
Sign up to our newsletter.
History’s most fascinating stories and darkest secrets, delivered to your inbox daily. Making distraction rewarding since 2017.
10. The Non-Human Animal
I once worked at a pet store where we had this rule about competing with other stores' coupons. Basically, we matched prices and this rulebook of ours was three pages long - being a keener, I studied it like it was super important. Part of the rule stated that we'd match our own online prices on certain items, but animals were not included.
So this guy came in wanting to buy a bunch of ghost shrimp at our online price, which happened to be a bit cheaper. When I explained the catch and showed him our policy, his response was, "But are shrimp really animals?" To which I replied, "Well, they're definitely not plants, monera, protozoans, or fungi, are they?"
11. Back In My Day…
Had a total "Dude, it's not the 70s" situation. Some guy sent his young teen into the store where I work to buy him cigs. I asked for an ID when he tried the first time, and then the kid came back with a note thinking that would somehow help his case. Still had to send him away empty-handed.
Turns out, that was just the start. Ten minutes later, the same guy demanding cigarettes stormed into the store and yelled at me. He was ticked off because his son was underage and I wouldn't sell to him. I informed him I could get fired for that and none of our staff would serve his son, even with a note. Yet, he continued his rant for a good 15 minutes.
12. But Do They Have A Doorbell Camera
I work in a nuclear power plant. Some years back, our emergency line number got leaked. Outta nowhere, we get a call on that line. One of our reactor dudes answers, "This is the power station emergency line. How can I be of service?" There's a click, then some guy's on the other end trying to sell us a new home security system.
So, our reactor guy goes like, "You got some microwave or infrared detectors? No? Bummer, coz we do. What about hand geometry scanners? Nope? Too bad, coz we do". This goes back and forth for a bit. And finally, our reactor dude ends with, "Buddy, you just called the control room of a flippin' nuclear reactor. In terms of security—ain't nothing you got we could use. Don't dial this number again".
He hangs up and I'm rolling on the floor. Too hilarious!
13. State Secrets
A while back, when my dad worked for the US Geological Survey, he and some coworkers had to work late. Feeling peckish, they decided on pizza. But, they messed up while dialing the local pizza joint's number. They didn't dial the code for an outside line, so they were actually calling through the government telephone system.
Crazily enough, the first few digits of the pizza place's number matched the extension of some office from the 80s Homeland Security equivalent. So, instead of their pie, they were met with a rattled guy questioning how they got the number.
14. The Right To Look Stupid
In the US, your social security number is needed when you sell a house for tax records. I was helping close a sale and realized we didn't have the seller's social. I asked him to fill out the required form. Cocky as ever, he scribbled something and slid the form back to me.
I was stunned at his reply. He'd written, "Not applicable. I don't respect the authority of the US". The guy was dead serious. Good thing he'd already signed off for us to find his social through proper, private channels.
15. The Devil’s Numbers
Back in the day, I worked at a Starbucks drive-thru. One lady I'll never forget. I'm like, "Hey, welcome to Starbucks, that'll be $6.66". She freaks out, "WHAT?! Starbucks shouldn't be giving out devil numbers! Isn't this supposed to be a family establishment"? I'm like, "Ma'am, it's just your drink and tax". But she's like, "It's against my religion! I need to talk to your manager"!
I tried to say, "Look, this Starbucks isn't tied to—". But she just shouted over me. Luckily, my shift manager was a legend and saved me.
16. You Should Know By Now
I'm part of a company that does annual checks on fire safety stuff for businesses. Things like sprinklers, alarms, fire extinguishers - you name it, we're on it. For a business to run legally, they need these checks every year. Some folks might skip it thinking they can get away, but let me tell ya, it doesn't end well if the fire inspector drops by.
Now, I'm the guy in the office who calls up our clients when it's time for their yearly checkup. These guys already know they need this done, they've got our services before. But, there must be something with my voice, 'cause more often than not, they're hanging up on me thinking I'm some salesman.
So, there I am, trying to call 'em back multiple times explaining I'm not some sales guy trying to make a buck. I also like to remind them, in case they slip, they're gonna have some problems with meeting the fire safety standards. But I've limited myself to calling just thrice—can't spend all day on this, you know?
17. We Can’t Help You Here
So, a bunch of guys stroll into the OBGYN office where I work and they're like, "Hey, I'm [insert name] and I need to see a doc for [random non-OBGYN stuff like surgery or a COVID test]". The kicker? They're arguing with me in front of an enormous OBGYN sign right at my workstation.
Seriously, unless you're concealing lady bits under your boxers or got a baby brewing in your dude-womb, you seriously oughta follow my directions and head to the department that handles your specific issue. Oh, and then there are the people who pop in RIGHT when they're about to have a baby. Always a hoot.
Just remember, we're a clinic, alright? We don't have a birthing department sneakily hidden between the drug sample closets and supply cupboards.
18. This Isn’t Walmart
I've spent years working at a sex shop, and we had a no-returns policy, plain and simple. Buy it, leave with it — it's yours. We made that clear. So, this dude buys a pump, right? I ask him upfront if he's sure it's the right size and remind him NO returns. Boy, did I not realize what I was about to deal with.
I let him buy and leave. Next day, he's back, trying to return the pump 'cause it's the wrong size and gets all huffy when I tell him — again — no returns, but he can buy a new one. He throws a fit, starts yelling, and demands to see the manager.
So my boss backs me up and he's not having it. He just starts hollering about how if this were Walmart and he sipped a gallon of milk, they'd let him bring it back! My manager just coolly snapped back: "SIR, you don't do the nasty with a milk bottle, and we ain't Walmart"!
Dude flipped his lid, we had a good laugh about it while he trashed the pump right there and then and stormed off. Man, I kinda miss those days…
19. What A Muslim Girl Wants
I used to work at Victoria's Secret. Being Pakistani, I was having a normal day serving at the cash desk when another Pakistani woman walked in to pay for her items. She begins questioning me and then drops the, "Are you Pakistani?" question. I'm like, "Yeah..".
Then she launches into this tirade about how a "good Muslim girl" isn't supposed to work at a place like Victoria's Secret. I'm just there staring at her, thinking, "Lady, I'm just a college kid...it's not that serious...it's a women's store". But I had the perfect reply: Once she's done with her lecture, I decided to ask her, "What about good Muslim women? Shouldn't they avoid stepping into Victoria's Secret?" She shot me a dirty look and walked out.
20. Bye Bye Birdy
I work at a pet shop. This one time, a lady rings up and says she's found an injured wild bird, and she wants us to take it. We can't do that – pet stores aren't equipped to handle wild animals, especially birds – and it's against the rules from the migratory bird act. Plus, we don't sell birds or have anywhere to stash it.
My buddy gives her the heads up, even points her to a local bird rehab place, but the lady goes nuts. Get this, she says it's "our duty as Americans" (no joke) to take this poor bird off her hands...because she's a customer. All my pal could say was, "I'm sorry, but we just can't take wild animals," and end the call.
21. Don’t Shoot The Transporter
I drive for a medical transport service for folks with disabilities and the elderly. One day, I showed up for an optional, cost-free clinic appointment for a client. The ride won't cost him a dime. He mentioned he didn't know about it, badmouthed our service, and kept talking about his health issues. If he'd wanted to, going to the doctor's appointment would've helped with those problems, but he clearly didn't want to.
I had to cut in and tell him "Look, I totally get it, but I'm just the driver here. We can change up your appointment if you want. I'll let the right people know". I love this job, don't get me wrong, but some people aren't that thankful for the service and we drivers often bear the brunt of it.
22. Laws Aren’t One Size Fits All
I used to work in customer service for this online furniture store. Last year, everyone was having trouble delivering orders on time (sound familiar?), and we were just being buried in angry emails about late deliveries. There was this one guy who wanted his money back, but his order was already out for delivery.
In line with our company's rules, we don't give refunds for orders that have already left our warehouse. So, customers have to wait for the delivery and then send it back to us if they don't want it. But this guy sent me an email, quoting this law that supposedly meant we had to give him a refund if he asked for one.
Yeah, that was a curveball. It seemed pretty unlikely the company wouldn't know about a law like that. As any good internet sleuth would, I googled the law by the name he gave me in the email. Plot twist, it turned out to be a UK law, so it didn't count for his order. I pointed out his mistake, repeated our policy about waiting for the delivery and then returning the product. As you can expect, he didn't take kindly to being corrected.
23. Maybe She Meant Another Dealership…
My buddy used to be a receptionist at a car shop. This one woman called one day, trying to get an appointment about her vaginal mesh problems. She kept interrupting my friend, not letting her speak. After having to hear a lot about the woman's business, my friend just had to pull the phone away and shout, "Lady, this is a car shop!"
The woman said sorry real quick and ended the call.
24. Not My Babies!
So, there's this one time while working at the adoption agency, I got a call I'll always remember. A lady wanted to return a blanket, which had me a bit puzzled. I thought maybe she wanted to return a donation we gave, even though it's unusual. Nope, turns out she had bought two blankets and wanted to return one.
When I told her that she dialed an adoption agency, not a store, she said, "Oh…well, I don’t wanna give back my babies!" I laughed my head off. Lucky for me, she found it funny too.
25. You’re Not My Matchmaker
So, this dude pops out his wallet and starts showing off a picture of his daughter. He's going on and on about how pretty she is and how she's killing it at her job, even prying about my age and stuff. Somehow, I kept it cool.
What I really wanted to say was, "Listen, man, I'm wrapping up med school, not searching for a bride. I'm here because the doctor needs me to check if you're having some brain issues, and dude, you're not really helping your case here".
26. But My Research!
During university, I worked the main desk at our library, checking out books and handling book fines. One day, an older grad student tried to clear her fines with a JCPenney store card. I had to explain we couldn't take that as a form of payment, and she lost it. She gave me an earful, saying no one else had issues with her card before. Plus, she claimed we were holding up her thesis research.
27. The Last Place You Look
I once left my Nintendo 3DS on a train. Since I'm a train operator, I posted a notice where I work asking if anyone had seen it and gave my number but left out my name. According to federal law, we shouldn't have personal devices at work. Roughly a week later, someone scribbled down a number on the notice saying they found it.
I ring up the number, give my name, and say I'm the dude who misplaced the Nintendo on the train. The dude who picks up says: “I think you dialed wrong, I'm the rule-keeping officer for the Federal Railroad Administration". My heart literally sunk. I had just ratted myself out to the very government guy in charge of penalizing me.
I cut the line and decided to put the whole episode behind me. Fast forward another week. It turns out the 3DS was at the bottom of my bag the whole time.
28. A Close Call
So, I used to work for this engineering company that, hilariously, only had a one-letter difference in their name from a drug manufacturer. One day, a guy rings up our main line, and somehow, the call gets to me. He's slurring his words and saying that he needs his medicine but the pharmacy ran out. It took me a minute, but I figured out what the heck he was talking about. I told him that he needed to get to the hospital and ring his doc.
He said okay, then hung up. That's when my heart sunk: I probably should've dialed 911 for him. But, he'd called from an unknown number. Even though it's been eight years, I still think about him occasionally. I really hope he's doing okay.
29. Equivalent Enough
So, I was working at this well-known California burger joint, you know the one with a really simple menu. This dude pulls up to the drive-thru, and seriously, starts ordering like it's good ol' McDonald's. I just let him talk, kinda grinning the whole time. Until he suddenly gets quiet and goes, "Oh no..".. But I had his back: I jump in and suggest a meal that was kinda like the one he was trying to order.
He's like, "Oh...Well sure! Thank you!" We shared some laughs at the window, totally made my shift.
30. The CIA Wants YOU
On my 15th birthday, I got a work permit and snagged a job at McDonald's, but was stuck at the register due to some old-fashioned laws for folks my age. One day, a scruffy older man came in and started going off.
He said he was a CIA recruiter on the hunt for promising young guys. He flashed some business cards and clung onto a briefcase, but wouldn't show me what was inside. Finally, he was kicked out when he didn't buy anything and the bosses caught wind of his antics. He hung around in his car for half an hour, then took off.
I never saw him again and realized later it was probably all a hoax. My young naive self almost bought into it at the time. Who knows what crazy situations I dodged.
31. Tale Of The Rail Scale
I used to work at a model train shop named [Local Area] Scale Rail. One time, I answered a phone call. The guy wanted a device to weigh real-life train cars. I told him we had a model version made by Walthers. He was super surprised when I quoted him $30 - he expected it to be 30 grand! When I explained we sell model train stuff, not real-life train equipment, he got kinda rude. He thought our name in the phone book was misleading, then hung up. Didn't even apologize for the mix-up. Go figure.
32. Sound Of Silence
I work in a funeral home. It's me who takes the calls after normal business hours, and I stay on the job non-stop for a week. Our phone line after hours is usually for places like nursing homes to report a death when they can't handle it themselves. I then get our team to come and take care of the body.
One night, I got a call from some dude in a call center about bumping up our online visibility. And get this - it was 9 at night! I laughed and told him that he's rung our emergency line, and explained what we use it for. It was dead quiet on the other side until he understood. The guy apologized big time and promised to take our number off their list.
33. Password?
When working at a movieplex, people constantly left the theater without their tickets. Since I don't have a photographic memory, and considering the frequent foot traffic, I couldn't just let them back in.
I ended up in frequent fights with irate moviegoers. So, to handle this, I thought up a devious strategy. I'd give anyone arguing the task of remembering a random word. I'd put that word in my phone, and if they could remember it, I'd know it was them.
One day, an irritable lady storms out. We argue, and I issue her the codeword "papaya". She disappears for over an hour, returning when the movie's nearly done, and I have no clue who she is. This lady then begins shouting random fruit names frantically, and I'm totally baffled. Like, who do you think you are, fruit salad?
So, I engage her in the fruit name match. "Apples!" "Banana"! It took me a few mad moments to realize it's her and she'd just forgotten that she was papaya. My boss, witnessing this fruity fiasco, had no idea what was going on. Maybe my plan wasn't so ingenious after all.
34. There’s A Stranger In My Car
Once, I was chilling in my car at night, waiting to pick up my friend from her apartment. Suddenly, my back door opens and closes. I figured it was my friend, so I turned around to crack a joke—but when I saw who was back there, I shrieked: There was a total stranger sitting in my car!
We had a moment of weird silence before it hit me: She thought I was her Lyft driver. I stammered out, "Er, I'm not a Lyft…” The lady looked totally shocked and let out an "Oh! I'm so sorry!" before she hopped out. My actual friend showed up a couple minutes after.
35. Karen’s Worst Nightmare
I was at work, cashiering at the Family Dollar. While checking out this lady's items, I grabbed a quick drink of water. Suddenly, she blew up - started yelling about how unprofessional I was, how I was a disgrace and claimed workers in customer service shouldn't be drinking on the job. She also made some nasty comments about my future, assuming I'd be a single teenage mom, all for taking a sip of water.
I shot back with a simple, "Lady, this is a Family Dollar," and she fired back wanting to speak to my manager. I just looked at her, swiveled around, pointed to my name tag and said, "That's me - I'm the manager". After that, I showed her the door because there were other customers waiting.
36. Thank You For Wasting My Time
I used to take calls at a multi-dealership call center, booking car services. One night, an older customer who couldn't talk loud and clear rang up. Like any good rep, I tried to deal with it. Took some time, but I finally opened a new file, got all their details down, and asked the car for service.
After much "Could you please repeat that?” and "Can you spell it?", I discovered they wanted service for their Rascal, the little scooters seniors use. But we don't fix scooters. I'd been on the line for like half an hour. Tired, I just told them we don't fix Rascals and ended the call. Not my finest, but it had been a long day.
37. Yer An Adult, Harry
I'm holding down a part-time gig at a kid's mental health clinic. Kids can be helped here until they turn 21—if they were registered before 18. After 21 though, they have to move on to an adult psychiatrist. So, one day this dude calls up wanting an appointment. He sounded young, but when I asked his birth year, he says 1985.
I was confused, thinking he might want to register his kid. But, he tells me he has no kids, the appointment was for him. He's been coming for nearly ten years and needs to see his doctor who sadly passed away last year, and the stand-in doctor had left too. He was aware of this.
So, I ended up on the line with him for a good 15 minutes explaining that at 36, he's too old for a kid's psychiatrist and needs to find an adult one.
38. “I Feel Jesus In This Arby’s Tonight”
So, a couple walks into my Jersey Mikes yesterday and starts sharing their beliefs. Nice folks, super "love thy neighbor" types - the Christians you could picture Jesus high fiving - but it felt a little odd when they got into a conversation about us worker-bees' lives, ending with an offer to pray for us.
The shop was quiet, so we said why not, and the guy went all in with a proper prayer, heads bowed, the whole ceremony. He didn't pray for us to turn church-going or find God, just wished for us to discover peace and hope in something - Jesus, someone else, or otherwise. Kinda strange, not gonna lie, but not bad, y'know? I'm not the churchy type, but their thoughtfulness was cool and hey, it got me out of work for 10 minutes!
39. I’m The Taxman
I'm a tax guy who works for a widespread company. A lady asked me for her past three years' tax returns. I checked our database with her name and SSN, but no luck. I cross-checked her details, and she admitted she had done the tax papers herself.
I told her I can only access returns made in our office which drove her up the wall. She called me a liar, claimed I could retrieve any tax return ever recorded nationwide, and even threatened to rat me out to the IRS. I tossed her the IRS's number and let them have a chuckle.
40. No Good Deed Goes Unpunished
Couple months back, this old guy phones my personal number wanting to buy tires. I'm no car parts dealer, but I decided to let him know he dialed wrong. Big mistake. The call went something like this...
Me: Yo, is this [man's name]? Old Guy: Yup. Me: Nice, just calling you back because you left a voicemail about buying tires. This ain't a business line, I don't sell tires. You got the wrong number. Old Guy: Hold up! I've dialed this number for Mike lots of times! Get Mike on the line!
Me: Dude, there's no Mike here. Like I said, you dialed the wrong number. Old Guy: Hang on, I've contacted Mike's automotive on this number lots of times! Me: You were trying to reach Mike's automotive? Old Guy: Yes! Me: *typing on Google, finds Mike's automotive on FB* Listen man, me and Mike's automotive have almost the same number...except my last digit is 7 and their's is 1. You've muddled up the digits.
Old Guy: Hold up! Need to figure out what went wrong! Me: Just told you, you hit 7 instead of 1. Old Guy: Yeah, seems I've written 7 on my note. Me: Yeah, that 7 should be a 1 to reach Mike's automotive...You good now? Old Guy: Yeah, I reckon I am. Me: Great, give them a ring for your tires. Old Guy: Yeah, reckon I will do that.
Me: Cool. And I hung up.
41. Canada Is Not America’s Hat
Our Canadian business keeps getting calls meant for an American Medicaid commercial. Our phone numbers may be too similar. A few calls each week but sometimes, it’s like 3-4 a day! And these folks always have thick Southern accents.
When I answer, no one cares that they've reached a box company, they just jump into their Medicaid questions. And then debating over who dialed wrong, it's exasperating! I tried finding the actual number they need to call but with no luck.
Once during the pandemic, some rowdy possibly New Yorker guy called to ask when basketball would restart. He might’ve been drunk, or not, wasn't easy to tell. I'm still puzzled how on earth these Americans find our Canadian number?!
42. Get Your Head In The Game
Had a day out playing disc golf with my better half. There were a ton of people in the park that day, so we found ourselves moving ahead of many groups. There was this older couple with their grandkids who called us over to show them a thing or two about the game.
We just finished our game and walked towards them to share some tips. Out of the blue, the old man started going on about politics. It had nothing to do with our conversation, but he was clearly worked up about it.
43. Elephant-Sized Problem
My wife had an interview where they asked her how she'd deal with "an elephant in the room". She didn't know the phrase, so she explained the steps she'd take to literally move an elephant out of the room. The interviewers let her go on, and she didn't get it until she told me the story afterward.
44. Je Ne Sais Quoi
I was once working at a UK clothes shop. A lady came in to return something - it was a receipt mess up. She laid the item and receipt on the counter, but the receipt was from a different store. So I passed back the receipt and mumbled "wrong shop" or something like that. She didn't speak much English; She was French.
I tried to show her the problem - pointing at the receipt, then the logo of our shop. After a bit, something clicked for her and she broke into laughter. She pulled out the correct receipt and got her refund. She must've been super perplexed because in her head, she was doing everything right.
The returned item was unworn with the tag on, she was within policy for a refund, and she gave me a receipt. I was relieved when she understood because it was getting pretty awkward and I was running out of ways to explain.
45. “We Get That All The Time”
I had to get a ham for Easter dinner and called to place an order. Couldn't make up my mind on the size though. I said, "We'll be about ten, but I fancy some extras, so maybe something that serves 15?" Listened to me ramble for a bit, and then he goes, "Lady, you've called Honeywell. You're probably looking for Honeybaked".
Piqsels
46. Librarian By Day, Mortician By Night
I used to work at my university's library tech department. One evening, I took this really creepy call. A guy wanted to know who to talk to about donating his body to the med school after he checks out. I was only 20 and totally stumped, especially since the med school was on a separate campus.
I told him he had to reach out to the med school. Turns out, he already did. I said something like, "Um... I can't help with that. This is just the library's tech support". Ended up stuck on the phone with him for about 35 minutes.
47. The Mighty Karen
A couple of years ago, I was working the customer service desk at Walmart, or as I like to call it, Hell's seventh circle. One day, a lady practically throws a bunch of clothes at me, slaps down a receipt, and says, "I've paid for all these, so don't you dare make up some phony clearance price". Checking the receipt, I immediately realize it's useless.
She kicks up a fuss, demanding a refund, and threatens to report me to higher-ups. I let her vent. When she finally stops, I've got my withering response ready: "Sure, I'd happily give you a refund... if this was Kmart since both this receipt and items are from there".
She struggles for a response, takes her receipt back abruptly, starts to say something, but decides against it. With an insult and a swish of her coat, she storms off. After I start serving the next guy, she marches back, manager in tow. She's obviously ratted on me, but the next customer wasn't having it.
He steps in, warning the manager, "If she gets anything for her terrible behavior, I'll be calling your district manager, who happens to be my brother". After hearing what happened, the manager supports me - the first and only time, but still nice. Finally, the annoying customer leaves in a huff.
48. He Keeps Coming Back For More
I once worked as a live chat associate for an online store. You know those pop-up chat boxes that appear offering help while you're browsing? That was me. One day I met a customer - let's just call him Moe. Soon as I greeted him, Moe started blasting about how our chat box had startled him, causing him to spill burger sauce on his tie.
We often get people saying all sorts of mean things, from accusing us of stalking them to affecting their shopping experience. But Moe took it up a level. After giving me a poor rating, Moe stormed off, or so I thought. He began showing up on our chats, yelling at different representatives, daily, for months! He always used the same name and email, leaving a trail.
I still wonder why he went out of his way to annoy our chat team as often as he did. Even years later, the name Moe is still quite a chat-room legend in our office.
49. Always A Good Time To Advertise
I work at a local health food shop as a cashier. One day, a guy came asking about probiotics. I passed him a brochure to help explain things better. He asked me which was the strongest, so I pointed him to one with the highest number. He wondered how many to take and I suggested the lowest dose unless a doc says otherwise.
Then he dropped a bombshell: He said he sometimes bleeds from his butt and wondered if probiotics would help.
I was like, dude, I'm a cashier, go to a doctor. While I was trying not to freak out, he asked me if I like pizza. I was kinda scared but managed an 'I guess'. He told me he owns a local pizza joint and that I should try it out. Pretty wild day.
50. Why Do You Think I Can Help?
In my previous job, I handled repairs for places like banks, prisons, hospitals, and supermarkets. I dealt with issues ranging from fixing crumbled ceilings to electrical and plumbing tasks. Based on the calls I received from the folks who worked there, I'd arrange for the right repair team to head over and tackle the problem.
Once, I got a call from someone across the country who wanted me to print and send a "stop grilling meat in the office sandwich press" sign. Except, we weren't in the same building and I had no way to deliver it.
Also during this job, I received a call about a colleague who was reportedly kidnapped during their China business trip. It took some convincing, but I finally got them to stop calling us and reach out to the police instead. Despite the seriousness, I shared a light-hearted "Shanghai'ed in Shanghai" joke with my desk mate. We had a laugh, even though the call did NOT seem like a prank.
