The words, "You are not the father" might bring tears of joy or sadness to a man's eyes—and this is why the question of paternity makes for the most entertaining stories possible.
1. A Rollercoaster of Emotion
I was in a long-distance relationship with a girl in college. After going two months without a period, she took a pregnancy test which turned up positive. After informing me, I had to keep myself from panicking. While she refused termination, she agreed to give the baby up for adoption when it was born. A week goes by and I get a devastating text from her.
It basically boiled down to, "I'm leaving you, the kid is not yours as my ex and I never used protection, and the doctor confirmed that the date of conception isn't when you and I were together. I'm not sure why you didn't realize this already, but I'm sorry for everything". It's a weird mix of feelings to be both excited and devastated.
2. Puzzled
My husband and I were visiting our friends who’d just had a baby (we are the godparents) and we were standing in the hallway talking to both sets of grandparents. Well, apparently the hospital has a rule that only 5 visitors may be present in the hallway, but the security guard had let all 6 of us in for some reason and we didn’t realize it.
This awful nurse comes up to us, notes that there are six of us, tells us someone will have to leave immediately, and then turns to my husband and says, “Oh, are you the daddy?” Without missing a beat, he says, “That’s what we’re all trying to figure out here". She gets a look of horror on her face and backs away.
3. So Many Reasons Why Not
About thirty years ago, I was really desperate and dated a woman who was about 12 years older. About nine months into our relationship, I went away to another state for a weekend trip. I came back to the shock of my lifetime. She had given birth to a child. I was perplexed because she didn't seem pregnant and no one around us knew she was pregnant.
She even said that she didn't know that she was pregnant. I'm black, the woman was white and the kid was also white. But I do have white people in my family. I didn't believe the kid was mine because I would have had to impregnate her in the first month when we hadn’t had gotten physical yet and the baby looks nothing like me.
My mom somehow convinced me that this has to be my kid because the woman says it is and that I have a mixed background. I want to believe it because not believing it means some other guy is the dad. But my rational side says there is no way she's mine. So, we move in and eventually get married. The relationship doesn't last and we separate.
I decide that I have to find out the truth, even though I know it. I get some money together and get a DNA test. Sure enough, I'm 99% excluded. I show the results to the mother and she says I'm wrong and the test is wrong and that I just don't want to be a dad. I tell her that I do, but I'm done paying child support.
4. Those In Glass Houses
One of my favorite cousins just did 23andMe with her dad and discovered that they were not biologically related at all. This is especially horrible because my aunt (her mother) is one of the most ridiculously zealous and judgmental people I have ever met. She screams at the baby cousins when they don't behave perfectly.
She literally threw a pocket bible at a woman in a grocery store. And she likes to send me unsolicited long letters about "God's plan" for my life. Surprisingly, her husband is the most fun and laid-back person I've ever met. He did not deserve this, or her.
5. Out Of His Depth
My parents got divorced when I was twelve. They had one of those informal "let's just see if we can work things out" talks to see if they needed an actual hearing. For whatever reason, I was there. I thought it was awesome at the time and felt so mature but I now understand that it was terribly irresponsible of my parents to allow me in.
So my parents are trying to hash out child support when Mom looks at Dad and says, "I just want you out of my life. I don't need or want anything from you. She isn't yours". Cut to an immediate paternity test proving I was in fact not my father’s child. He left and just like that I had no dad anymore. Not that he was much of a one in the first place.
6. Moving Quickly
I had exchanged messages with this one girl on a dating site who I then later added to social media. We'd flirt casually but it didn't get further than that. No dates, no nothing. She and I were both East Indian, she made good money as a nurse but still lived at home with her parents. She would date on the sly though.
She messaged me after a few months of limited conversations, saying we should totally hang out. When we met up she drives me to this parking lot by a park, 20 minutes away from my place. She was overly flirty. After a few hugs, compliments, huge smiles, and kisses, she suggests we go somewhere secluded in the park.
I'm a grown man who has an apartment, so I told her we could just go back to my place and take it from there. She agreed, but said she wanted to take me to this park (it's almost midnight) and takes me by the hand to a super secluded bench in the park. She's all over me and I legit pick her up in my arms and tell her I'll bring her back to my place.
I put her down by her car and her smiles turn to tears. She tells me I was one of the nicest guys she knows and she was sorry. Then she revealed her twisted plan. She was going to trap me. She spoke about how I had pictures with babies and my younger cousins all on my Facebook and knew I would take care of "my" kid. She had missed her period and confirmed she was pregnant.
She wanted to have relations with me and tell me I was the dad. She said her parents would disown her due to the pregnancy. I didn't say anything, but sat her in the passenger seat of her car and went to drive myself home.
7. A Long History Of Infidelity
Before my friend got married to his wife, he confided in my husband how he found out she had cheated on him. Despite all his venting and confessions he still ended up marrying her. One year later, she was pregnant and my husband and I both doubted it was our friend’s but they both seemed happy so we were happy for them.
The baby girl was born and since she looked reasonably like the couple, no one thought anything of it. Our friend raised the baby girl with so much love. When the baby was about 1.5 years old, our friend found out his wife cheated on him again. He started questioning the truth about their daughter. He got a paternity test and he was not the father.
8. A Quiet Realization
I used to work in the newborn nursery at a hospital. We got the babies right from delivery, cleaned them up, footprinted them, checked vitals, etc. Dads usually came in with the newborns. This dad comes in with this baby. Dad is white, mom is white, baby is very obviously not white. The dad was very quiet standing next to this baby, watching us clean it up.
He says quietly, "I don't think this is my baby". You could tell he was absolutely devastated. We advised him not to sign the birth certificate until he was sure. Not sure what happened after we sent the baby back out to mom, but I felt awful for the guy.
9. Visual Evidence
My ex-wife and I had been married for six years and we finally decided it was time to have a second baby. I work as a VP of sales for a popular restaurant chain and traveled extensively as part of my job. After trying for a few months whenever I was home from traveling, she finally got pregnant. Things were going great and our male nanny was doing an amazing job.
When the baby was born, it was immediately clear it was not mine. My wife and I are both white, and the baby was very dark. I walked out of the delivery room shocked, left the hospital, drove aimlessly for a while, and finally checked into a hotel off the highway when it started getting dark out. Turns out my nanny knocked up my wife while I was away traveling for work.
They had been sleeping together for years. We sold the house and got a divorce soon after, and share custody of our daughter. She got re-married to the nanny and they just bought a home together a few towns away.
10. Nearly Impossible
I had an on-and-off relationship with a woman. At one point, I had a car accident, and I could no longer drive to her place so we very rarely saw each other. She dropped it on me that she was pregnant after months of not meeting up or talking. I listened, and I told her I would need to know when to take off work for the birth. But then she made a big mistake.
When she gave me the due date, I instantly realised that the date of conception was after my car accident. She really tried hard to convince me, so I told her I would pay for a DNA test, which she declined. She admitted to sleeping with someone else. I wasn’t even really mad. I suspect she prefers saying I am the dad over the other guy.
11. The Timing Seems Off
I had been with my wife for about five years when I decided to go back to school. We talked it about for quite a while because the program I wanted was highly specialized and I would have to move to another state. My wife stayed behind for her job and we met up as often as we could. Everything was fine...until the end of my first semester.
When the final papers and exam prep started really piling up, I didn’t visit my wife as often as I had been and when I did see her, I was often too stressed and tired for anything physical. We ended up not doing the deed for about three months. After my exams were finished I went home for the holidays and enjoyed romantic time with my wife.
The second day I was home, she announced she was pregnant. I assumed she had found out months ago and was waiting until I wasn’t so stressed to tell me in person. I was actually pretty excited and planned to finish my second semester and then defer my second year to be home with my baby. Over the summer, I excitedly got the house together.
But by month eleven of the pregnancy, I started to question whether this baby was mine or not.
12. A Cool Exit
My best friend was dating a girl and knocked her up. They got engaged and planned to get married right after the baby was born. There were about 10 of us in the waiting room, waiting for her to crank out the baby. It was her parents, some of her friends, and some of ours. After sitting there for about two hours, he walks out with a smirk on his face and says, "Let's go".
We all thought something horrible had happened. Her friends ask how the baby is, and he said, "Fine, but Black". He motioned for us to go, so we followed him. In the parking garage, he tells us to follow him to his apartment, then sends me a text asking if I could put him up for a while. We literally moved him out of his apartment and into my spare bedroom in like an hour.
Her parents didn't know who to be mad at. The confusion on their faces when he told them the baby was Black was priceless.
13. The Weirdest Revenge
My high school boyfriend’s family were a bit trashy, and that’s putting it lightly. His 19-year-old sister got married at 17 and started trying to have kids. She finally had one in August of the year she turned 18 and by the end of September was pregnant again. So I go off to college about the time she births the second one that next summer.
Eight weeks later she’s pregnant again. This is where I should mention her husband’s genes are strong. All four of his kids look exactly alike (he had two from a previous relationship). After she gave birth to number three, I came home from college for break and went to visit her. She brings out the baby in a blanket and puts him in my arms.
She says, “Look! Look at him!” I was slightly confused until I realized what she was trying to say. She says, “Looks nothing like him, huh?” I kind of nodded bewildered. She goes on to explain that she was mad that her husband wanted her to keep shucking out kids so to prove a point she cheated and had one that wasn’t his that he’d have to look at all his whole life.
14. You Are Not The…Mother?
I was blood typing a newborn once. Mom was an O+, baby was AB+, which is more or less impossible. I immediately panicked, because I thought they mixed up the babies. Someone has the wrong baby. We're going to get sued, they're going to have to genetic test the entire nursery, then they’ll subpoena me for being the one who discovered the problem.
After repeating the test three times I called the nurse and told them that they'd either drawn the wrong baby's blood, or they'd switched babies because Mom couldn't be the baby's mother. Then I find out it was a donor egg. The redraw matched fine, everyone was where they were supposed to be.
15. Questionable Motives
I dated a girl for some time, but when my ex came back around I thought we would get back together, so I broke it off with the girl I had been dating. Well, needless to say, I never got back with my ex. Let me also mention, at this time, I was a single parent who had raised a well-adjusted daughter for 14 years, had my own company, and was doing fairly well for myself.
One day, years later, I get a call from the girl I had been dating for some time and she tells me she wants to meet at a local coffee shop to have some coffee. She was being very evasive and doesn't tell me why. So I meet up with her and she breaks out all these pictures of a little boy who's about 4 or 5 years old and tells me that this is my child.
We decide to go next door to the local pub and have a few drinks, one thing leads to another and she's trying to get me to hook up with her again. Even though she was engaged at the time. We ride around and talk, the whole time she's trying to get me to find some place that we can go fool around, and I'm just not in the mood.
I just found out I probably have a son and I have a lot on my mind, and it's not her body. I decide to take her back to her car but she's too inebriated to drive so I take her to her mom's and as she gets out of my truck she realizes she's lost her engagement ring, which she took off at some point in time in the night. We part ways with me telling her we need to get a DNA test.
A few weeks go by, she's introduced me to her son, we go out a few times as a mini family, and then it comes time for the DNA test. It comes back as 99.9% I am not the father. She tells me it has to be wrong, and she’ll pay for another DNA test. We go have another DNA test and as you can imagine the results came back the same.
16. Not Clued In
I used to work with a guy whose wife was pregnant. It was nearly time for delivery and everyone at our place of business had a big party with gifts, money, etc. The big day comes, her water breaks, and they get in car to go to hospital. She breaks the news on the way there it’s not his and if he could just drop her off at the hospital and then leave, that would be great.
He took a few days off work, found a new apartment, moved out, and filed for divorce. He called in to work and told someone what happened, and the news spread pretty fast. All the congratulations cards were cleaned up and thrown away. Everyone was very sensitive to his pain. Except, somehow, I don’t know how, I did not get the news.
So on his first day back, I walked into the office he shared with 6-7 other guys and said, “Hey hey, Daddio, how’s fatherhood so far? Getting any sleep? Got some pictures? Let’s see the little tike!” He slowly lifted his head to look at me with a painful look. The room went fully silent. One of his workmates stood up, grabbed my arm, and walked me out of the room, shushing me.
17. Sorry, Wrong Chat
One of my former supervisors was from a West African country but had moved to Canada for studies and work. He had a wife back home. He'd go back and forth two times a year. Then she gets pregnant and gives birth to a baby boy. During one of our shifts, he sees messages on his phone and excuses himself. Hours pass, I don't see him return.
Then he comes back to his desk and sits silently. When the morning staff comes in, he leaves, saying goodbye to me and speaking to our top boss before leaving. He resigns during the week. But then he returns to the company a few months later. No one knew why he had left in the first place. The rumor we heard was family emergency.
One night when we were out drinking, he told me everything that had happened. His wife used to send him pictures of their son via text and email. She accidentally sent him pics that were meant for her boyfriend that she took while the two of them were intimate together. That’s how he found out the baby wasn't his.
18. Could Never Be A Father
After almost three years of marriage to my wife, I caught her cheating on me, with the father to her child, in late December 2016. By the first of the year we both decided to work on our marriage and try to put everything behind us. To make it more complicated, the guy she cheated on me with was the fiancé of one of my best friends.
By the end of January 2017, she was still keeping her relationship with him going so I left her and moved completely out of our house the night that I found out. I filed for divorce later that week and around the beginning of March was our first divorce hearing. In court, the judge asked if any children we born into the marriage, we both said no.
He then asked if any children were conceived in the marriage. I said no, but she said there had been—and that was how I found out she was pregnant. He then told us he could not grant the divorce since a child had been conceived and paternity had not yet been established. The entire nine months that she carried that child she still continued to tell me how much she missed me.
19. Do What You Gotta Do
My grandfather was a tall, lanky fellow with a long face. He was of British descent, with somewhat dark colouring, and very, very distinctive features. My grandmother was blatantly, blazingly Irish. Pale as heck and completely blanketed in freckles, with a mischievous, dainty little nose, and reaching a grand height of 5'3.
Somehow, none of my grandfather’s odd-looking features appeared in any of his children. And apparently, there was a good reason for that. Neither child was his, and he knew that, and was totally okay with that… extremely happy about it, actually. See, my grandpa nearly lost his life in an accident. He survived, but it left him infertile.
A few years later he met a woman. She was unmarried, with a 2-year-old daughter she'd given birth to after a fling with an Irishman. My grandpa married her and adopted my aunt as his own and loved her immensely. A few years later, I guess they decided they wanted another child. But IVF wasn't exactly an option in that time and place.
Apparently, they asked a neighbor to offer his services. And grandma had another baby girl. They all thought it was a fantastic arrangement; practical and resulting in joy. He was a truly wonderful father, and his children adored him.
20. Still Related
Before we met, my husband was in a relationship for 10 years and they had a little girl. The girlfriend had postpartum depression so he did most of the raising of the baby. They broke up when the kid was about four. They had an agreement that she wouldn't sue for child support as long as he paid daycare and anything else she needed and it worked well for them.
When the little one was six, he went to pick her up from daycare and the ex flipped out and demanded he had no right and he better take her back or she would call the authorities and report she'd been kidnapped. He took her back to daycare and told them to tear up the check he'd just given them because he was going to cancel it.
It was not the right thing to do but he was angry and not thinking. They ended up going to court and the court asked if he wanted a DNA test. He wanted everything done by the book so he said yes. Test results came back that he was not the father. But that wasn't even the worst part. See, his daughter looked so much like him...because she was his brother's.
21. Moving Up And Moving On
I had a college buddy whose fiancée was pregnant. They were the perfect couple. Both of them had just over a year left of their degrees with great careers lined up, everything was butterflies and rainbows. Fast forward to the delivery room, they're in there, and out comes a very Black baby. My friend's quite the pale redhead, and the mom's a blonde-haired Texas girl.
My friend made sure everyone was okay, waited for her parents to arrive, and left without saying a word. He moved all his stuff out of the house while she was in the hospital, and cut off all communications with her. He just walked out of their lives in the most stone-cold act I'd ever seen. They were together for nine years, and he just left cold turkey.
She tried to contact him at his job a few times, but he quickly moved up the ladder and eventually got a job in another city. He told me once that he took solace in the fact that her family had already dropped about $10,000 on a wedding that never happened.
22. It All Adds Up
I was married for nine years when my wife started to go out with friends a bit more often than usual. She would leave me with the kids. She goes on a trip a few states away and comes back three months later. I had already had a vasectomy, but somehow she still got pregnant. She then proceeds to run a campaign of lies on me.
I spend months still living with her, trying to file for divorce while she works overtime to convince a baby she conceived while she was away was mine. Even though I was rendered medically incapable of having kids. Finally, I just decide to pack up my things and leave while she was out with her friends. Surprisingly, I hear absolutely nothing from her for a while.
Later, I find out she has a boyfriend and she’s given birth to what she still says is my child. I think there is no way baby is mine, it looks nothing like me. I put up the money to have both me and the boyfriend tested for paternity. And the icing on top? It came back that neither of us were the father.
23. In The Know
My sister got pregnant in high school and later met her now husband when she was five months pregnant. She is white and her boyfriend is black. The baby’s father was white and not present. One day, I was with our entire family, including my now brother-in-law, visiting the baby. My sister was still in recovery from her C-section.
Brother-in-law picks up my niece and holds her lovingly, the nurse looks at him and says, "She should darken up in a few days". We all had a laugh. We knew he wasn't the father, but the nurse didn't. I always wondered if she assumed adultery. They have two more girls together and he legally adopted my niece.
24. A Stressful Situation
My sister had three kids and a husband, and she went to El Salvador for school since she is a geologist. She contracted a parasite that ate out one of her intestines and it lead to her in a hospital getting surgery after surgery. Anyways, she met another patient in a room close to her, and one thing leads to another and she’s out of the hospital, and pregnant.
Her husband wasn’t suspicious because they hadn’t seen each other in ages and were very happy to see each other. However, the baby was born with hair redder than fire, which made no sense since both my sister and her husband had jet black hair. This immediately ruined literally everything and sent my sister through years of guilt and depression.
Time has healed most wounds, and her husband is surprisingly dealing with it better than anyone thought. He even takes the kid when all the other kids go to stay with him.
25. A Rare Event
My aunt is a nurse in the maternity ward. She had a couple come in where they were both very Black. The lady has baby and it is very white. Totally pale, no trace of any pigment. They put the baby on her mom and the mom starts yelling about how this isn't her baby and they took her baby. In all fairness, you can be very confused after delivery, it happens.
She was just sobbing and freaking out and the father is just sitting there and looks very confused because even he's realizing that even if she did cheat, there is no way the baby would be THAT white. The doctor and nurses are trying to assure her and her husband that this is absolutely her baby and the skin usually darkens later.
Come to find out that the husband actually has relatives who are albino. Turns out that's what happened, the baby was albino.
26. Life Can Be Complicated
A few years ago, I ended an emotionally and physically damaging relationship. I moved my stuff out of this guy’s apartment but he asked me to hang out one last time. He put on his nice-guy persona and played with my emotions and stupidly I slept with him, kind of as a goodbye, I guess. I moved into a new house later that week and an old friend helped out.
I ended up christening my brand-new bed in the heat of the moment with the old friend. He was my strong hero helping a damsel in distress. A few weeks later find out I'm pregnant. I was very ill with constant nausea, and extremely stressed out. It was rock bottom. I told them both about the pregnancy because I wanted to be honest.
My old friend got weirdly clingy and emotional, borderline stalkerish, and spent most of our conversations crying on me and needing me to comfort him but offered me no comfort in return. He made me pull away and distance myself. My ex turned all hero and provided the support and comfort I needed, he took charge.
But he refused to raise a kid if it wasn't his and wanted a DNA test. He moved me out of my new house and back into his, despite the possibility that the baby wasn’t his. He pampered me like never before, he put on an amazing act. He ordered a high-tech DNA test that tests the baby’s DNA via my blood against the man’s blood sample to see if they match.
It cost him nearly two thousand dollars and took far longer for the results than we had hoped. The day after my birthday, we found out they weren't a match. I was already back in his hold, if I didn't do what he wanted I would be out on the streets homeless, penniless, and pregnant. He instantly dropped his act and became worse than he was before.
The whole ordeal broke me completely and I decided to just leave and raise my daughter by myself. The real father doesn't know about the test. I know it would break him, he is more mentally fragile than I thought, and I care about him even though we no longer are friends.
27. His Real Dad
My fiancé’s father is almost certainly not his biological dad. His mom was just a genuinely terrible human being who didn’t even try to hide the fact she was cheating. But his dad loved him from the second he was born and when the mom decided years later she just didn’t want the kid anymore she just gave him to his dad and rode off.
My fiancé’s dad ended up getting married and they tried for kids before finding out he was incapable of ever fathering children. He sat my fiancé down when my fiancé was 13 and told him the truth and that if he wanted to test they would, but it was up to him. He cried and told his dad he just wanted him to be his dad and that was the end of that.
28. A Lot Of Love To Give
Years ago, when I was in high school, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant, even though we hadn't been intimate in several months. We already had a two-year-old daughter by then, and things were just not going well between us. Mostly because she's not very nice. Fast forward approximately nine months, to the time she was ready to deliver the baby.
We had broken up by then and moved into different homes. I drove her to the hospital because no one else was able to help her. Later that day, she calls me and asks when I'm going to see my son. I drop by the hospital that evening after work, and there's a little baby boy with the unmistakable, very distinct facial features...of my best friend.
Of course he denied all of it. We weren't really friends after that. This little boy was my responsibility until the court-ordered DNA test were done a year later, which proved I was not the father. My old best friend wasn't around and didn't help out. So I raised his son, along with my daughter, as my own child.
29. First Time’s The Charm, Apparently
My husband had his first experience with a girl, then two weeks later the girl claimed she was pregnant with his child. After measuring the fetus, the doctor changed her original due date to a month earlier. Which means her conception date was a month earlier. She still swore she hadn't been with anyone else for months before him.
At that point he was in love and naive, and he actually believed her. They even named the baby after him. As a newborn, he could pass for his kid, and I honestly thought the kid was his back then. We started dating when the kid was 2.5 years old. He was starting to develop more defined features, and he looked absolutely nothing like my husband.
The mom’s friends started telling him things about how she would ask them if her son looked like different guys she had been with. They even told him that she had been cheating on him with multiple men. When his son was three years old, my husband finally bought a DNA test kit and found out the obvious truth.
He was devastated to say the least. He still continued to take care of him but stopped paying child support. The kid is 10 years old now and we still have him every weekend.
30. A Moment Of Confusion
I was in the delivery room with my best friend when she had her first son. She had a really tough time, so the baby came out pretty puffy-faced and head all squished up, and he had a thick head of black hair. She's white, her husband is white—they handed her the little dude, she's beyond exhausted, and she says, "This baby is beautiful and all, but I'm sorry, there's been a mistake. He's Asian".
31. Family Is What You Make Of It
My stepdad (who is an outstanding man and father) was in the Navy and had just broken up with his girlfriend. As soon as he moved across the country she told him she was pregnant so he moved back and married her to take care of what he thought was his kid. As soon as the baby was born it was very apparent the baby was not his.
Regardless, he stayed married and raised my stepbrother and had another son with his now ex-wife. When my other stepbrother was born, it was even more apparent the first baby wasn’t his as the second baby looked exactly like my stepdad. They stayed together a few more years but she wouldn’t stop cheating, so he eventually took my brothers and left.
Later, he married my mom and had another child who looks exactly like him. The only upsetting part is my stepdad didn’t want to break the news to my stepbrother. My stepbrother didn’t find out until he was 19 and had a huge identity crisis and eventually met his biological dad. Now everything is okay and we’re one big happy family.
32. Blissful Willful Ignorance
I have an uncle who has been teased his whole life for the way he looks and has struggled to get a girlfriend. This caused him to feel depressed at times, but he still buckled down and worked hard and now owns a landscaping business and makes good money. About a year ago he brings this girl to our family event introducing her as his girlfriend.
He spends the night telling everyone how in love they are. She is gorgeous so everyone is impressed and happy he found love but a lot of people start to comment that she seems to be uninterested in him but we chalk it up to her being shy around the big family. They very quickly move in together and she very quickly gets used to spending his money.
We start to suspect she's in it for the money but he won't listen to that so no one knows what to do. About two months into their relationship, she says she's pregnant. We're all happy for him as he always wanted to be a father. About six months into the pregnancy, his sister who works at a hotel says she saw her there with some guy she didn't recognize.
Again my uncle refuses to believe that. We figure maybe she saw someone who looked similar and stop pressing it. A month ago she has their son. She is white with blonde brown hair. He is mixed race so very light brown skin with medium brown hair. They both have blue eyes. The son is very dark skinned with black hair and brown eyes.
But he still says we are being mean to his girlfriend and that if we can't accept her to get out of his life. Many family members have begged to get a DNA test but he refuses and is insulted to be asked.
33. Door To Door Baby Salesman
When I was working in labor and delivery, a dad passed out during the delivery and when he came to the nurse handed him a baby girl that was several shades darker than he or his wife. The baby was also apparently conceived under such circumstances that he knew he was the father. So this guy was walking around delivery trying to figure out who's baby he had.
He was popping his head into random rooms asking if anyone had misplaced a baby. This continues until he ran into the grandma. Grandma proclaimed that baby girl is the spitting image of her late husband. No one has ever told him that his grandpa was black.
34. Get Your Facts Straight
About 10 years ago, I was in between relationships and acting like a pretty irresponsible person. I was dating a lot, and having casual hookups with women who definitely weren't relationship material. One of them was a good friend with benefits type, we knew each other from a previous job together and were both single so it just worked out.
One time she calls me up in the day which was abnormal and asks if she can come by. I'm bored, so I say, “Sure, let's hang out". She sits down and breaks the news she's pregnant. She's slightly happy about it. She was NOT prepared for my response. I tell her that's wonderful but she might have forgotten I'd had a vasectomy five years ago. Cue a fair amount of expletives, then it got really awkward.
I wasn't upset that she was seeing other people, we had nothing even close to an exclusive agreement, but it was a shocker that someone I considered a good friend would be willing to just throw me under the bus like that.
35. Statistically Improbable
I married my high school sweetheart right after we graduated. We waited until our wedding night to first have relations. I guess she realized she liked it, just not with me, because she immediately started sleeping with basically any guy who even glanced her way while only showing interest in me maybe five times over the course of a year.
She ends up pregnant and leaves me. She moves in with my best friend because she doesn't know if the boy is mine, his, or another guy's. She has the baby and he looks like he could be mine or my friend's. I want to be a dad, so I get it put in the divorce papers that no one but me can do a paternity test on him. And I won't.
She ended up marrying my friend and had another baby that looks like my son.
36. Bold Moves
In high school, my sister was pregnant with her boyfriend's best friend's baby. The alleged father found out there was a possibility it wasn’t his about a week before she gave birth. I went up to see her once he was born and he looked just like the friend, there was no question. I broke the news to her boyfriend and he was absolutely devastated.
His parents were heartbroken and super upset. They had bought the girl everything she needed, including a $500 car seat and stroller set. She refused to give anything back as she kept claiming it was for the baby, regardless of the dad. She started up a relationship with the friend immediately after having their child, and they're still together a decade later.
But the kicker for me has always been that the boyfriend and best friend were next door neighbors. She moved into his house after coming home from the hospital. So her ex-boyfriend and his family had to see them basically every day raising this child that they had believed to be his for the entire pregnancy. I can't even imagine.
37. To What End?
My brother was about twenty or so when he started hooking up with a woman who was probably close to fifty years old. They never bothered with protection because she got her tubes tied after having her last child, and besides, she would have to be going through menopause. Anyway, he gets bored and starts seeing her less when she springs it on him she’s pregnant.
She claimed he must have untied her tubes somehow. He gets excited and starts throwing money her way, only pausing when our parents suggest a DNA test or they wouldn’t help out. The woman up and disappears to another state saying she had a family emergency. I told my brother this all seemed off and while I wanted to support him, he needed to be wary.
About five months later, she texts him a picture of a baby that’s full term still claiming it’s his. He still wants the DNA test and she’s denying it, pulling the "don’t you believe me" card. In the end it finally all came out that she was never pregnant, the child she took a picture of was her grandchild. Her daughter was so mad when she found out.
38. She Knows Too Much
When I was working as a nurse, I had an older male patient who was in for anemia with critically low hemoglobin levels. He was receiving a few units of blood. I'd been taking care of him the last couple of days, and his daughter was visiting at the time with the patient's wife. The daughter was incredibly kind and attentive towards her dad.
We had to do our identification process for the blood, where we go over the name, ID numbers, and blood type for confirmation before hanging it on the patient. When we were going through it, the daughter stops us and asks us what blood type we just said. I didn't really understand why at the time, but I told her again, and she got really concerned.
She said we may be hanging the wrong blood. She said that it couldn't be right because she was an anatomy professor, and there was no way the crossmatch could be right. Since she was AB, and she knew her mom had blood type A, her dad couldn't possibly also be A. I didn't think much of it, and went back to the doctor to ask him for another crossmatch.
The doctor looked at the paperwork for a moment and said, "Oh, yeah, she might not be his daughter then". We ordered another crossmatch, and sure enough, it came back as an A blood type. The daughter just sat in the corner really quietly the rest of the day with a really sad look on her face. Her mom and dad didn't really get what was going on, but I know she had some idea.
39. Not Ready To Be A Dad
My dad claims that I am not his kid because I look different than my siblings. I have brown hair and light skin. While my two sisters have black hair and tanner skin. But then again, if you look at my family on my mom's side, one person either has green eyes or brown hair or both. Some have dark skin and some have light.
I have the brown hair gene which was more light brown when I was born but got darker as I grew up. Also the light skin gene but my eyes are a shade of olive green but so dark they look dark brown. Personally, I think I look a lot like him when he was a kid, but he seems determined to deny our relationship for whatever reason.
40. Undeniable Evidence
My brother broke up with his unhinged girlfriend, and a couple months later, she started calling him, telling him she was pregnant. He was very skeptical that the baby was his (we all were), because after they broke up, she basically slept with everyone who would. We waited for months, so she could have the baby and my brother could get the paternity test.
He was in the delivery room and I was waiting right outside to support him. After the baby gets cleaned up from delivery, my brother comes walking out with this weird look on his face and shows me the baby...who looks more like his clone than his son.
41. A Family Matter
After dating for about five months, my older brother’s girlfriend tells him she’s pregnant. He’s not concerned at all about not being the father and breaks the news to our family who was very supportive. About two months later, we get a group text that she’s going into labor so we are obviously very worried about the baby being born so early.
He’s concerned too but the baby comes out and is perfectly healthy, and he’s totally oblivious that it’s just not possible for this baby to be fully matured. Looking back I’m sure he was just in shock, and really hadn’t had time to process everything but nonetheless he didn’t see any red flags at this point, but our entire family did.
I reached out to our other brother because he happened to know the guy this gal dated before our brother. So my oldest bro reached out to this guy who confirms that they had relations approximately 9 months prior. My oldest brother breaks this news to me but isn’t sure how to tell my brother. A day or two later, I go to the hospital to visit brother.
At this point some of us had talked to my brother about the fact that something is very off here. I am sitting there in the hospital room with them when the nurse comes in with the birth certificate asking for his signature. Out loud, in front of the nurse and mom I tell my brother that he cannot sign that paper until a paternity test is done.
The nurse, bless her heart for helping, immediately agrees and says that if there is any doubt as to who the dad is he shouldn’t sign it yet. Well as you can imagine, it was not his baby. He was devastated and certainly he was pretty embarrassed about it all but he was eternally grateful to me for being there when it all went down.
The strangest part is that I had a customer cancel an appointment on me that day which allowed me to get there earlier than I otherwise would have. I won’t push religion on anyone but it was one of the moments in my life that made me believe in a higher power.
42. Some People’s Lives Are Just That Messy
My brother’s ex-wife cheated on him with a man at that man’s own wedding reception. As soon as she found out she was pregnant, she started having regular bouts of intimacy with my brother out of nowhere to make it believable it was his. I guess they weren’t too “active” at that time due to work stress or whatever else.
About six months after the baby was born, my brother started hearing whispers around our small town. That suspicion mixed with the fact that his daughter looks nothing like him and so he got a paternity test. It turns out it was the other man’s after all. My niece is three now and my brother still claims her as his own, even though he is now divorced.
43. That’s Not How These Things Should Go
I was at the US embassy in Korea, in line behind a couple getting a birth certificate for their new child. The woman at the window asked for a little information about the couple. As he was telling his story it came out that they had only met eight months prior to this appointment. The baby was currently about 1-2 months old.
The woman at the counter said something like, "Hm, so you met eight months ago and babies take nine months…" The man looked really confused for a second and the women blurted out, “He came earlier than expected". This seemed satisfy both the man and the woman behind the counter. Or so it seemed for a brief moment.
A few seconds later, the woman behind the counter said to the woman, "So I see you lived in the US most of the last year, up until nine months ago, what were you doing there"? The man looked at her, flabbergasted. I guess he never knew she had ever been to the US. The women looked around really nervously while saying something about an ex-husband.
The guy she was with started crying and the person behind the counter asked them to step into a private room.
44. She Had Her Wits About Her
I was a medical student on my OB rotation when my wife was pregnant. She went into labor and I brought her to the same hospital where I was doing my rotation. All of the residents and attending physicians taking care of her were the people I worked with every day. When my son came out, they cleaned him up and handed him to my wife.
I was standing there full of emotion, marveling at the birth of my first child, and then my wife turns to me, and in front of all of my colleagues, says “And just think, he’s probably yours!”
45. Don’t Look
I got a call for a delivery and the husband is very excited, he even wants to ride with his wife to hospital. He sits in front and there are two medics in the back. The wife delivers on the way. The baby turned out to be visibly another ethnicity than the parents. One medic asked in the most professional way they could if this was expected.
The wife just burst into tears. The husband was still super excited because he couldn’t actually see into the back from where he was sitting. When we arrive at ER, we try and hurry the husband to the entrance before mom and baby were brought out. We didn’t quite get dad inside because he seems to know something is up.
At some point, he comes back toward the stretcher moving toward the ER entrance, catches sight of the baby, and absolutely loses his mind. He used all the regular insults and a few words that I’m pretty sure he made up.
46. At Least He Was There For The Birth
When I was around 16 my older brother was having his second child with his long-time girlfriend. One day after school I go over to their house to hang out with them and the girl starts going into labor. Everyone helps load her into the cab of his truck and we speed off to the hospital, which is a little over an hour away.
Now I am in the bed of the truck along with a friend of my brother’s, speeding down this two-lane highway to get this girl to the hospital before the baby comes out. We make it on time and they take her back into the delivery room to have the baby. A few hours pass and my dad, mom, and three other siblings show up along with my grandmother.
We wait around, and about six hours after arriving, the baby pops out. So when we were given the all clear we all rushed in to see the baby, the mother is laying on the bed beaming saying she loves my brother and she is so glad that they had another little boy. Well, the nurse walks in, pushing the baby in his little crib—and that's when it hits all of us.
The baby is half Black and we recognize who the dad is. It’s the friend who is there with us standing in the room with this look on his face. My entire family along with my brother walk out of the hospital and just leaves the mom and friend there together at the hospital. Apparently, while my brother was locked up, the friend offered his girlfriend some "comfort".
The guy never did step up and take care of the little boy, my brother eventually got locked back up and my parents took in the two boys for a long time and made the mother jump through the CPS hoops to get them back.
47. A Big Surprise
I was working in a hospital and a woman came in for belly pain. We found out and told her she was 10 weeks pregnant. The husband at the bedside started laughing, grabbed his coat, and left the room explaining to us that he had been in Afghanistan until three weeks prior. He looked back and her and just said, “Well, that’s that Brittany".
48. An Expensive Sandwich
Many years ago, I got a subway sandwich. The girl behind the counter was incredibly flirty with me so I asked her out. Later, she very much wanted to hurry up and do the thing. We did. I pulled out. At a later date, she gave me a rubber to use "so I didn't have to pull out". How ironic that it magically broke that night.
Days later she drops a bombshell: She's pregnant, and it's mine. I stuck it out until when she was supposed to be 3 months pregnant, she looked 5-6 months. Then surprisingly (not), she was having a "premature" delivery. The kid that came out was completely done cooking. Full head of hair, able to lift his head to look around with his eyes wide open.
She still stuck to her story that it was mine. We took a blood test and it wasn't mine.
49. Why Did She Keep The Evidence?
A friend and his girlfriend were on again/off again and she got pregnant. She swears it’s his, he wants a paternity test but they have to wait until the kid is born. He moves in with her and her mom. She has the baby and they take the test which takes a while to come back. He and his family are over the moon about the baby, so they forget about the test.
He remembers and mentions it to his girlfriend’s mom one day and she says, “Oh yeah, she didn’t tell you? Came back a while ago, totally your baby!” Awesome, all is well! A few months later they’re moving out and he finds the test in a box. Not his baby.
50. Better Off Without Him
My biological father is Greek with very pale skin and my mom is a white Western European. When I was born, I had very dark skin and a full head of thick black hair. He didn’t seem concerned but his mother freaked out and called my mother and grandmother not so nice names and left. Apparently my dad seemed happy for about a week.
My father ended up splitting on us when I was about 3 weeks old with no explanation. A couple months later my skin lightened, all of my black hair fell out, and it turns out he was the father. My father and I tried to form a relationship when I was in high school. It went okay at first and then he got weird very quickly.
He insisted I call him dad, insisted on regular visitation, and routinely showed up at my friends' and boyfriend's houses causing a scene. He insisted I get family pictures with his new lady and his five other kids, none of us have the same mother, and this is not including the baby he had and ditched before he got together with my mom.
Cherry on top, he was working for my now husband’s parents when my husband and I first met. Once his parents found out who he was and what had happened, they fired him so I would never have to run into him at their business. He had it coming anyway so they we glad to finally stop making excuses for him and let him go.
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