Humans like to think they are the smartest beings on Earth, and they are...for the most part. Just take these dumb customers, for example—retail workers tried their best to be patient and nonjudgmental, but their idiocy was just too hard to ignore.
1. Can You Repeat The Question?
Once, while tending to a patient in the back of an ambulance who urgently required nitroglycerin to bring down their high blood pressure, I said, "Before giving you this drug, it's vital that I double-check to ensure you haven't consumed any erectile dysfunction pills like Viagra or Cialis over the past three days. If you have and I give you this nitroglycerin, it could lead to a critical plunge in your blood pressure".
Next, I questioned: "Have you ever ingested any of these pills?" His response sounded doubtful, "Absolutely not!" I asked him again for validation. He replied, "Definitely, I have never taken them". I reiterated the list of possible dangerous side effects. And once more, he claimed, "No, not at all!"
Frustration crept in, but I continued, "Alright, place this pill under your tongue". Suddenly, he stopped me and asked the dumbest question imaginable, "Does generic Viagra count, too?"
2. "Error" Message
When we need to send sensitive documents, our usual method is to secure it with encryption and a password. Normally, we send the document and password in two separate emails, following standard procedure. I remember receiving a message from a fella who was having trouble getting the document I sent him open.
My first question to him was, "Have you tried using the password?" which he confirmed by saying, "Yes, but it showed an error". To get more clarity, I further questioned, "Which password did you put in?" His response was, "I simply clicked OK, and it mentioned incorrect password".
At this point, I started suspecting something wasn't quite right. I asked him, "Hold on, did you actually enter any password?" He admitted he hadn’t. So then I suggested that he should try the password that we had given him. His response made me facepalm so hard, "I assumed it wouldn't work, so I deleted the email".
3. A Splash Of Stupidity
In the past, I worked in a paint store. One day, a lady came in, letting me know that she had plans to paint her fence. I offered her some tips, and even gave her a quick rundown on how to prep the surface before painting. Then she posed a question to me: "Will I need some tools to get the paint onto the fence?"
My advice to her was that a roller or a brush would do the trick. Her reply totally floored me. "Wait, I can't just toss the paint onto the fence?" And she was completely serious.
4.< A Bug’s Life
I once had an internship related to the study of insects at a place called Butterfly House. In spite of its name, it isn't just butterflies; we also had an array of amazing bugs that we grew in our lab. Some even made it to our exhibits.
As interns, our job was not only to care for the insects, but also to interact with visitors and show them some of the bugs that weren't on exhibit. This also gave us a chance to lessen people's fear of these creatures.
One time, my fellow intern and I had a funny moment. We had a huge stag beetle with us that day. A mom and her little one came over, intrigued by the insects on display. Then she caught us off guard with a question.
Pointing to the stag beetle, she inquired, "Which type of butterfly is this?" We both shared a glance, trying not to giggle at the situation. Nevertheless, my colleague calmly explained to both of them that it was not a butterfly but a beetle, pointing out the differences between the two.
5. And That's "Fax"
I once held a job at a call center for a major banking corporation. A customer rang me up while he was at one of our bank branches, complaining about the length of the line. He asked for my assistance, so I wanted to know what the issue was. His reply really surprised me.
He informed me that the ATM machine wasn't working, and he needed to make a cash withdrawal. Puzzled, I asked how I could help him take out cash via a phone call. His response was, "Why can't you simply fax the money to me?"
6. He Was Missing More Than Just His Toppings
I once had a job at Subway. One day, we ran out of lettuce. This posed an issue for a particular customer, whose sandwich enjoyment hinged completely on its lettuce content. When I informed him of our lettuce shortage, he enquired if I could slice up some from the back room.
I explained that we don't manually prepare the lettuce, it arrives pre-shredded and packaged. I emphasized that we didn't have a shred of lettuce left in the shop. It was at this point that his complexion took on a bright red hue.
He looked at me rather crossly, but without any hint of expression and questioned, "How do you manage to open your shop without stocking up on essential items?" He seemed unable to wrap his head around the fact that we occasionally ran out of supplies due to consumers like him, and we wouldn't consider shutting down the eatery because we're short of one topping.
7. Lacking Brilliance
Once upon a time, I worked at a charming little kiosk in a shopping center, selling exquisite jewelry. We had an array of beautiful pieces, like gold bracelets and necklaces with a silver lining, silver rings glittering with cubic zirconia stones, and gold engagement rings sprinkled with clusters of tiny diamonds, to name a few.
Amongst my clientele, there were many regulars, however, one woman stood out. This particular lady had a hobby of inquiring about every single item that caught her eye, and she always posed the same question that drove me up the wall: "Is this real?"
Time and time again, I patiently explained to her what "bonded" meant, and that although our diamond rings didn't come with a $25 price tag, they were still authentic sterling silver adorned with man-made gems. No matter how often we had this conversation, her response was always the same, "Alright, but...is it real?"
8. Counting Chickens
Once upon a time, I was employed at a deli in a supermarket. An unforgettable encounter with a customer left me at a loss for words. The lady in question asked me about our eight-piece chicken and curiously inquired, "How many pieces does the eight-piece chicken contain?"
In response, I confirmed, "An eight-piece chicken? Well, there are eight pieces in the eight-piece chicken". She received my answer with grace, responding with a bright, "OK, I'll take that, please!" So, as directed, I prepared her order, and she departed with a satisfied smile.
9. Recreational Catnip
I used to work at a local pet store focusing mainly on dog supplies, but we also had a small assortment of cat-related items like toys and catnip. One fairly recent and somewhat quirky product we added was a variety of catnip designed to resemble a prohibited plant.
It came in "prescription" bottles and even "pre-rolled" sticks. Generally, customers were quick to recognize these as catnip products. Even so, I was frequently met with the same amusing inquiry from many customers: "How's a cat supposed to smoke that?" or, even more humorously, "Can they even use a lighter? They don't have hands, they've got paws!"
It always left me stumped, and I'd just end up chuckling in response.
Sign up to our newsletter.
History’s most fascinating stories and darkest secrets, delivered to your inbox daily. Making distraction rewarding since 2017.
10. The Combo Guy
During my high school and early college years, I was employed at Wendy's. I recall an incident with a gentleman in his 50s, donned in a striking magenta suit. He came in one day to order a burger. I asked him politely, "Would you prefer a combo meal, or just the burger?" His response was, "What's a combo?"
I tried to explain simply that a combo included a burger, fries, and a drink. But for some reason, he just couldn't grasp it, leaving me a tad frustrated as he was still confused. He repeated his question, "What does a combo mean?"
Despite our back-and-forth, nearly five-minute long conversation, I can't recall if he finally understood or if he even ended up ordering it. Yet, what stayed with me was seeing him a fortnight later, still in his unforgettable magenta suit, working at my second job where I was training political canvassing teams in another town.
The surprise was so profound that I found myself utterly speechless, staring at him, and thinking to myself, "There goes the combo guy".
11. A Total Guessing Game
I used to work at a service station that sold more than just fuel. One man approached the counter and stated, "Twenty outside". Puzzled, I asked, "Which pump?" and he replied, "The one on the right".
Given there was a left and right at every pump, I inquired as to which vehicle, and he indicated a truck. His subsequent request was, "Can I get a slice of pizza?" I answered, "Absolutely, what type would you like?" His reply, "Pizza," left me stumped. We usually had three or four types of pizzas on hand.
Lacking any insight into his taste preferences, I clarified, "What type? I wouldn't want to serve you something that you won't enjoy". His response was, "Whatever works," so I picked out a slice at random. Naturally, he had the most infuriating response and asked, "Can I have a different one?"
I was on the verge of giving up at that moment.
12. Turn Up The Volume!
In my job, I served as an IT representative for the department. Once, a colleague came up to me stating their computer speakers weren't working. My initial response was, "Did you attempt to increase the volume?" They responded to my seemingly ridiculous question with an eye roll, stating, "Yes, definitely".
Together, we then made our way across the office to their desk. Arriving there, I got slightly frustrated. After a quick glance at the setup, all I had to do was turn up the volume. That incident made me want to throw in the towel.
13. Just A Wii Bit Dense
When I was in college, I worked as a store manager for GameStop. One day, a man phoned to inform me that the second-hand Wii U he'd purchased for his child was no longer functioning. Apparently, his kid had accidentally dropped the console.
I told him that although he hadn't purchased an insurance plan, I could exchange it for another one if it had "just ceased to operate". So, I subtly hinted, "Maybe your son's Wii U stopped working before it was dropped. Come on in, and I'll give you a replacement".
I felt for this guy and wanted to help him with a free Wii U, because life happens, and I honestly didn't mind. I'd soon regret my generosity. Instead of taking the hint, he continued to debate with me, steadfastly maintaining that his son's mishap was the reason for the Wii U's malfunction.
He insisted, “I observed the incident; it only quit working after he dropped it. I'm absolutely certain". Once more, I suggested, "Sure, but perhaps the malfunction wasn't due to the fall. It likely just malfunctioned by chance. I can only replace it if the defect wasn't due to dropping it. Let's assume it was faulty to begin with. Bring it in, and I'll offer you a replacement".
However, the man remained persistent, adamantly declaring, “Nope, it definitely failed due to the fall”. An hour later, he appeared in person to purchase another Wii U, paying full price this time. By chance, my District Manager was present in the store during this time, and I couldn't express my disbelief openly.
I was astounded that the man didn't understand the freebie opportunity I was extending to him, despite my elaborate explanation.
14. Going In Circles
An adult woman came up to me one day, quizzing me on the size of our pizzas. I casually extended my fingers, sizing up about a foot, and indicated, "Roughly this much". After a thoughtful pause, she asked, "You mean in length?" It occurred to me that she might not realize our pizzas are circular.
So, I clarified that since our pizzas are round, measuring from any point across essentially gave the length. Later, I shared this exchange with a colleague. After revealing my response, "..any point across is length-wise," she wore a puzzled expression. Her comeback was even more bewildering.
She gave me a playful smile and said, "Alright, we get it, Mr Engineer!" I walked off, not knowing quite how to react. I didn't consider myself a genius for understanding basic circle geometry.
15. Checkout Time
So, I had a job at this café where we had two coffee sizes—small and large. One day, I was manning the cash register and there was this girl who came in. We had a bit of a chat about what kind of coffee she had chosen, there were no issues there. Now, the real confusion began when I asked her about the size of coffee she'd picked.
She shot back, somewhat suspiciously, "Why do you need to know?" I, surprised, found myself explaining that each size had a different price due to the varying quantity. This seemed to irk her, as she retorted with a rather dismissive sigh, "Are you implying I'm trying to cheat you?"
16. Houston, We Have A Problem
While screening Apollo 13 for my astronomy class, a student posed a question that astonished me more than any other one in my teaching history. During the famed "Houston, we have a problem" scene, a student lifted their hand meekly at the back. His buddy tried to stop him, assuring him his question was a dumb one.
Curiosity piqued, I went back to hear the question and the answer was priceless. The student asked, "Do all the people there go by the name Houston?" Well into a decade as an educator, and that question is still my favorite memory of all time.
17. Hitting Below The Belt
There was a time when I worked as a karate instructor. One day, a woman came in with a unique request to host a birthday party at her home. She wanted to purchase black belts from us for her child and their friends. While I had no qualms in selling her belts for home usage, the problem was that we didn't keep such things in our inventory except for tests and promotions.
I politely declined her request, suggesting an alternative source—a particular online website where she could find them. In return, I also provided insight. I informed her that most schools refrain from selling them because of the dedication and sheer effort students pour into securing them.
I assumed that she would take her leave upon hearing this, but, NOPE, she persisted. Pointing at the black belt around my waist, now faded and worn from continuous use, she asked, “Well, what about yours? Can I just buy that one?” As though I would agree to part with something I had been using every day for the past decade.
18. Testing My Patience
Once upon a time, while I was working in a popular eatery loved by organic and health enthusiasts, an interesting woman approached me. She inquired about our water's ionizing radiation level. Basically, if we hadn't tested it to meet her standards, she'd leave.
Intrigued and a little mischievous, I assured her, "Absolutely, we do. In fact, I'll show you, I just need to grab my radiation detector, or 'Geiger counter' from the back". My operation was perfectly executed—I used a fake Geiger counter app and ran a "test" on a glass of our tap water.
She believed every bit of it and proceeded to order a fruit salad along with a bottle of water. I couldn't hold back from sharing the event with my manager, and we both shared a hearty laugh over it. I still shake my head in disbelief, baffled by how smoothly the plan went.
19. She Wasn’t Plugged Into Reality
During my five-year stint at Apple's Genius Bar, I had a memorable encounter. A lady marched in one day, thrusting a brand new Apple TV at me and announced, "It's not working". I set the device on the bar, ready to dive into the usual troubleshooting process. But first, I needed to determine if she brought her HDMI and power cords to connect it.
So I queried, "Did you bring your cables?" Her retort had me struggling to suppress laughter. She quipped, "What do you mean? It's wireless". She was under the impression that the TV didn't require any wires at all, hence, she left the power and HDMI cables unplugged.
20. In Need Of An Upgrade
When I was working at an authorized Apple store, an elderly lady, possibly in her late 70s or early 80s, wandered in with a problem. She had an iPhone 4 with a tiny 4GB storage, which was completely used up. She didn't understand her phone and the necessary upgrades.
I tried my best to communicate that she needed a bigger storage device for the phone to function properly. I assured her that she could still keep all of her cherished family pictures. All that was needed was to move them via the iCloud service online. That's when she dropped an unexpected question, "What is the internet?"
With tears streaming down her face, it was clear she didn't understand my explanations at all. I needed to step out for lunch, handing the situation over to my store manager to continue helping her. When I returned from break, she was still there, now by the payment counter, the proud owner of a brand new phone.
My manager had sold it to her so as to hit his monthly sales targets. I bet he never bothered to explain what the internet was.
21. Sitting This One Out
I was employed at a ski shop that also sold camping gear during the slower summer months. We featured tents, chairs, and all sorts of hiking necessities. Typically, we would have a sample of chairs outside while keeping additional stock inside for customers to purchase.
One customer spotted a chair, double-checked it inside, and then puzzlingly asked us, "Do you have any of these in stock?" We were taken aback for a moment before responding, which I guess didn't sit well with her. She reacted more dramatically than we anticipated.
She huffed out of the shop, accusing us of being bad at our jobs and suggesting we should choose a different career path. To our surprise, she even lodged a complaint with our head office, who then checked with us about what transpired.
We forwarded the recorded security footage to them, leading to her ban from the store. Although she was a frequent visitor, she wasn't a big spender. One time, my coworker approached her with a friendly smile, offering assistance.
She responded rudely, demanding him to "leave her alone" and made a swift exit, leaving my coworker utterly flabbergasted.
22. A Losing Game
I worked a part-time shift at a video game shop. One afternoon, a frazzled soccer mom walked in with her lively kid and started nagging me about not having "that Sonic game" in stock. When I asked her to specify the game she wanted since I wasn't sure which one it was, she retorted, "The fast one! My kid wants it and he better not get disappointed".
I tried clarifying to her that if she was referring to Sonic Forces, it was open for pre-orders as it was yet to be launched. I suggested, “If that's the game you're looking for, you can pre-order now and get it once it's launched". But she didn't want to hear it.
She insisted, "My kid wants it today. I'm willing to give you an extra $10 if you can secure it for me. It'll be our little secret". Her lack of understanding was frustrating. I reiterated, "I'm afraid, ma'am, we just don't have the game in stock. And even if we did, I'm not allowed to sell it before its official release date. Just to reiterate, if your kid is wanting this game, you can pre-order it now and pick it up on its scheduled release day".
She then demanded to talk to my manager, hoping to convince him to break the rules for a game that we didn't even have in stock.
23. Cable Confusion
In my decade-long experience as a web developer, I've fielded countless calls from clients thinking their website is broken when their internet is down. They'd start by saying, "Our website isn't working". I'd gently suggest trying another site and often, they'd reply, "Actually, none of the websites are loading, and even our email is down".
24. Lacking Book Smarts
Once upon a time, I had a job in a school library. We'd swing the doors wide open for the students during lunch breaks, but as soon as it got crowded, we'd have to shutter up. We used a huge 'Closed' sign that was set on a mobile easel.
This sign was big enough, and positioned in such a way that students could see it from both ends of the hallway. It even took up half the hallway's width, forcing students to skirt around it. Despite this, it was really exasperating to see how often students would still ignore the 'LIBRARY CLOSED' sign, bypass the shut double doors, and attempt to march in.
Whenever this happened, my go-to response was always, "Hey, did you check out the sign?" More often than not, their answer would be a simple, "No". Then I'd chuckle and say, "Oh, that's a shame! If you're unable to read, maybe a library isn't the best place for you. Bye!"
25. Rolling In Laughter
During my college years, I worked at a Japanese restaurant where we sold a dish called the Volcano roll for $7. Incidentally, it was simply a California roll, priced at $3, skillfully carved into a triangle, and fancily topped with some warm spicy mayo and a smidgen of fish—a mere 10 cents' worth.
A smart option was to order the California roll and request spicy mayo on the side for an extra 50 cents, then ask us to heat it up. However, one day a gentleman ordered a Volcano roll amongst other sushi, seemingly trying to impress his date. When dishing it up at the restaurant, we'd usually add the sauce on top, making the roll look like its namesake, a volcano.
Upon serving him, he examined his plate puzzledly, declaring, "Ah, I didn't know you guys smother it in the sauce. I usually get takeout and the sauce always comes separately. I'm not very fond of it. Could you perhaps whip up another without the sauce?" Trying hard to suppress my chuckles, I agreed to his request.
Back in the kitchen, I relayed his peculiar request to the sushi chef. With a hearty laugh, the chef agreed and simply prepared a California roll, served it up on a plate, and I delivered it to the customer. He eagerly accepted it without realizing he'd excessively overpaid $7 for what would have actually cost him $3.
The chef and I merrily shared the free Volcano Roll. Ordinarily, I would've clued him in on the little secret, but he was acting considerably arrogant while trying to win over his lady friend all evening.
26. Cut It Out
A lady came in wanting to buy some cloth to dress up a couple of tables but wasn't sure about the sizes. When I pointed out that tables can vary greatly in dimensions and that there's no standardized size, she quickly assured me that the first one was a standard size. So we kicked things off on a high note.
We eventually managed to work out how much material she required and moved on to the cutting part. But then we got to the second table—and that's when the situation started going south. I was pulling out some cloth from the roll to align it properly when she suddenly grabbed it and began shifting it around.
She unfolded it and asked about its width. I told her the measurement, which was printed right on the roll. After a brief pause, she seemed to get an idea and asked, "If I cut this, will it get larger?" I had to muster up all my professionalism to tell her politely, "No ma'am, reducing its size won't actually increase it," without breaking into laugher.
27. Frozen Fool
My job was handling the seafood section in a major supermarket. One day, a lady strolled in looking to purchase some shrimp from the pre-packed frozen section. But, she wasn't interested in buying the whole bag, just half. As I reached for the bag, she dropped a crazy request.
She requested that the cost and weight of the ice crystals clinging onto the shrimp should be removed. I didn't know whether to laugh or to get mad, so I asked if she wanted me to rinse it off. But she quickly said no because she didn't want them to thaw. I'm pretty sure the ice weighed less than the plastic bag itself.
I gently explained to her that I couldn't fulfill her request which made her leave. To this date, I consider that exchange as the most absurd customer interaction that I have ever had.
28. Here Comes The Sun
A possible customer once requested me to completely obstruct sunlight for a unique event set up. This was supposed to be timed with an anticipated huge solar eclipse. He had successfully convinced his own client that we could pull this off. His shocked reaction was priceless when we explained our solution...
We would need to shoot something as large as the moon into space for us to make his request a reality.
29. When A Karen Calls
During my university years, I was employed by a posh playground equipment company. They offered a varied range of robust playsets built from pure California redwood, fully customizable with an assortment of accessories for upgrades as children age. Although it wasn't the best job, I gained some insightful knowledge into human nature.
I once encountered the most overprotective mother I've ever seen. As her little ones wandered around the showroom floor, she would let out horrified gasps if they got anywhere near the playsets—a pause, a gasp! A trip, a gasp! It's still a mystery to me how we were able to sell her a playset priced between $5K-$8K.
Her behavior escalated after delivery. She rang us, creating a commotion, puzzled about how her children were supposed to use the slides. There was a handrail for support, so her concern was baffling. With frequent gasps, she INSISTED that they must lay flat and cross their arms like they were on a water slide.
I left my boss to handle that one. At my young age of 19, I was at a loss for how to explain how to properly use a slide.
30. Open And Shut
Back in my days of working in the returns section of a big tech store, I once dealt with a very annoyed customer who wanted to return his laptop because, according to him, the CD drawer wouldn't open. He was very upset and didn't hold back while expressing his anger over the phone.
He demanded an immediate resolution, stating that it was unacceptable for a brand new laptop to have such issues. Eventually, when I had the chance to inspect it, guess what I found out? The laptop didn't even have a CD drawer. Instead, it showcased a slot drive.
If only the customer had taken a moment to figure this out, he could have saved himself the hassle of our three-week return process. I ended up drafting a Return To Sender report, explaining the situation quite bluntly, which gave me a good bit of satisfaction.
31. Zip It
I used to have a job at a retail store. One time, I saw a lady trying to put on a boot in such an unusual way. She was persistently trying to insert her foot through the side of the boot, where a tiny zipper was. Her outburst was absolutely unforgettable.
She continuously protested that the boot didn't fit well around her calf, and that it simply felt weird. I strolled over and enlightened her that her foot should enter through the top of the boot, not the side. The zipper was there to assist with extra space as she put the boot on.
I don't recall her exact words, but her bewilderment was certainly palpable. All I did was calmly place the boot down and slowly retreat.
32. Disney Dunce
I used to be an outdoor vendor at Disneyland, selling things like balloons and ice cream. I would get my fair share of odd questions, but there was one that really took me by surprise. I was stationed on Main Street halfway between Adventureland and Frontierland when a woman with her family approached.
She asked me a pretty surprising question: "Are we in the castle?" I was taken aback by this because the castle was clearly visible to our left. All I could do was just say, "No, it's over there," pointing in the direction of the castle. She asked me again, still believing that just by entering Disneyland, you were automatically inside a castle.
Even her young daughter pointed out to her, "See, I told you we weren't in the castle yet". It left me absolutely astounded.
33. Half-Witted
At my job, we'd often run sales where everything was half off. One day, a customer caught my eye. She seemed to be a woman of means, either due to her own success or marrying well. For almost an hour, she wanted to know the half-off price of each item she picked up.
"How much is $20 with the discount? What's half of $50? After the sale, how much would $24 be? Could you work out what half of $60 is? What's the new price for this?" The catch? She did this for every single item she laid her hands on. My patience began to wear thin and I started responding succinctly.
After wrapping up her purchases, her bill amounted to around $180. On asking how much she'd saved, I coolly replied, "Just about the same as what you've spent".
34. That’s A Rap!
Once upon a time, I was an engineer at a music recording studio. Out of the blue, I received a phone call from a budding local rapper who was looking to record vocals for a couple of tracks. I was thrilled about the project, anticipating a day of enjoyable and straightforward work.
He would create the beats somewhere else, and I requested him to bring those files with him. Entering the studio, where I had prepared the vocal room, I was met with an unexpected revelation. Cheerfully, I exclaimed, "Fantastic! This will be so much fun! Let's listen to your beats first and then we can lay your vocals over them".
He gave me a confused look and replied, "The beats are on his YouTube page". He didn’t grasp the fact that it was technically impossible to record vocals directly onto YouTube from our studio.
35. Total Eclipse
When I was younger, I would volunteer at the local science museum in the town where I grew up. We realized a major event to observe the solar eclipse and made it a city-wide viewing affair. A mini-group, headed by a woman maybe nearing 40 years, approached us. She had an outlandish demand.
She wanted us to delay the main part of our event for a few hours until their family members could leave work. They hoped we could rearrange the eclipse's timing.
36. Granny’s Garden Romp
A lady in her late 60s or early 70s rolled up to a closed door at the corner of the garden center on her scooter. She found herself parked there, gazing at this door for a couple of minutes. In the meantime, roughly a dozen shoppers navigated around her, heading towards the actual entrance.
After a while, she turned to me, somewhat exasperated, and asked whether the garden center would soon be open. Here comes the amusing bit—there were around 200 carts brimming with plants all neatly arranged in a pen, making a clear path to the entrance.
Customers were quickly passing by with their own carts teeming with greenery, going in and out of open doors. I kindly informed her that the garden center was already open and the entrance was just twenty feet to her left. She then spent another couple of minutes figuring out how to maneuver her scooter into the store.
So far, she had been the only one baffled about where the entrance was.
37. History Buff-oon
Back in high school, I had a buddy who picked up an American History book for her class. Then she saw a classmate with a US History textbook and got all flustered, questioning if she was in the wrong course as, to her, America and the USA were different countries with unique histories. But that's not the end of it.
She also doubted the common belief that a meteorite wiped out dinosaurs. In her mind, it was humans who caused their extinction. Interestingly, it was while babysitting and watching a kid's movie about dinosaurs that she realized her misconceptions.
38. They Didn’t Make The Cut
In my hairstyling days, Saturday afternoons would get super busy. Just when all our stylists were occupied, some folks would stroll in asking if we had room for walk-ins. Most got that Saturdays are our most hectic day and graciously walked out. But there were some that wouldn't take no for an answer.
Like one client who, despite seeing us all on our feet, complained "You're all just standing around". I tried showing her our jam-packed appointment book filled with back-to-back appointments for the next ten hours, but she still played skeptic. And to our amazement, she wasn't the worst we ever encountered.
Once during a severe snowstorm that paralysed the East Coast, we were instructed to stay put and not leave our homes. When we got back the following day, we were greeted with 30 unanswered calls from people wanting to get their hair done.
39. Growing Pains
I used to work as a veterinary technician. There was this one time a dog owner accidentally ran over their own pet. Owing to the owner's financial constraints, a professional surgical repair was not plausible. So, we suggested the alternative option of amputating the injured dog's leg.
Given the dog's youth and good health status, we believed it would effectively adjust to life with three legs, which is common amongst dogs. Consequently, the owner agreed to proceed with the amputation. However, what came next was quite surprising. She inquired about the duration it would take for the leg to regrow.
40. The Old Switcheroo
I found myself working the graveyard shift at a petrol station. Somewhere around the crack of two or three am, a customer drove in for petrol. Approaching the counter with a rather assertive manner, he queried, "You got daytime fuel here?" His question left me quite perplexed, causing me to respond with a confused, "Excuse me?"
He elaborated, "Daytime fuel. I'm certain you guys swap it out once the sun goes down, but I don't want your dumb nocturnal fuel. I only want the daytime version". At a loss for a suitable response, I found myself clumsily stating something about adjusting the pipelines and assuring him that it indeed was the much sought-after "daytime fuel".
41. Paper Vs. Plastic
I used to work at a bank. One day, a lady needed to cash a check, but all she had with her was a photocopy of her driver's license. This created a pretty big issue. I tried to explain to her that a copied version of her license isn't the same as an actual, valid ID, so, much as I wanted to, I couldn't help her.
Despite my explanation, she was adamant that her ID was legitimate. I attempted to clarify my point: "We can't accept IDs on paper, it has to be the original plastic card provided by the DMV". She didn't seem to grasp this and answered back, "I don't use a paper ID. I have my license!"
I asked her, "Miss, is the ID you're showing me printed on paper?" She conceded, "Yes," and I responded, "Then, it is indeed a paper ID, and we're not allowed to accept paper IDs". But she again protested, "It's not paper, it's my license!" This back and forth went on for about ten minutes.
42. It Was A Sign For Change
One of the most baffling questions I've encountered was from a previous colleague. Roughly a decade and a half ago, the firm I was with organized a large gathering for around 100 of us employees. This was presided over by the owner and CEO of the business.
The discussion was about our impending shift from our longstanding home base, where we'd been for over six decades, to a contemporary facility in a nearby suburb. As part of this announcement, an image of the new office was shown, with the previous company's logo still visible.
Following the presentation, the boss welcomed any questions. Then a staff member got up to pose a question that truly showcased a lack of common sense. She asked, in front of everybody, "Will we be altering the signage on the building?"
Almost all eyes turned towards the source of this puzzling question. The identity of the asker was no surprise to us, it was indeed her. The boss gave her a long, incredulous look before finally responding, "Yes, we absolutely plan to replace the existing signage with our own company's name".
43. It Didn't Add Up
When I used to tend bar, we once had a 21st birthday party in our event room. A group of guys came over to the bar and ordered Turbo Shandies, which is a cocktail of half ale, half Smirnoff Ice. When I asked curiously why they chose this particular blend, one of the guys said, "Well, the ale is 5% and the Smirnoff is 5%, so it's like a regular Shandy, but it's 10%!"
I took a moment to explain to them that blending a 5% beverage with another 5% drink doesn't result in a 10% drink, it actually still remains 5%. The response I got was a wave of laughter, they thought I needed a math lesson. So I just shrugged, poured their Turbo Shandies and thought, "Well, drinking that is punishment enough".
44. Never Ending Nonsense
I used to work in customer service, over the phone, for a company that sold appliances. Trust me, it was a constant rollercoaster of crazy! We once sold a teakettle with a built-in thermometer for brewing different types of teas at just the right temperature.
The moment it hit the shelves, we were swamped with calls from people, confused as to why the temperature didn't start from zero degrees Celsius. There was also this woman who actually timed how long it took her kettle to boil and noticed it took longer in winter.
I had to patiently explain to her that it was because the water was colder during that season. Another common misconception I constantly had to clear up was about limescale. People would freak out when they saw it in their kettle, but I had to reassure them that limescale is always in tap water and it doesn't cause any harm just because it becomes visible in the kettle.
And then there was this one incident where a lady actually tried to seek compensation because her hand mixer started spinning while she was cleaning it— all while it was still plugged in and turned on!
45. Milk Madness
My buddy had this job at Meijer, and one day, this lady comes up to her with an odd question—she wanted to know where the breast milk was. Misunderstanding the request, my friend guided the woman to the dairy section, assuming she was talking about traditional cow's milk. But then, the lady clarified that she was looking for human milk.
Politely, my friend informed the woman that human milk was not something Meijer carries. The customer became livid, demanding to speak with a manager. The manager arrived, and the woman let loose into a wild rant. She accused my friend of depriving her of human milk.
The manager listened trying to make sense of the unusual situation. After five minutes, he interrupted the woman and asked, perplexed, "Are you serious?" The woman countered with the usual "I'm not shopping here again" line. The most bizarre part was that she never even brought up a baby or mentioned feeding one.
46. Film Frustrations
We were shooting a commercial using a green screen, along with an actress in a green body suit to manipulate a puppet. Our client was visibly upset with us, even though they didn't voice any complaints. When we began filming, the person overseeing things actually commanded us to halt. The green body suit seemed to be the issue for her.
We clarified that the actress would disappear in the editing process, but the client questioned, "Why don't you remove her now?" I double-checked to make sure she wanted the puppet to be animated. Her reaction surprised us. She said emphatically, "Of course, but it'll look ridiculous with a green-clad person guiding it!"
I reiterated that the actress wouldn't be visible after the editing. However, this only upset the client more; she insisted we remove the actress immediately. I attempted to teach her about how green screens work, but she wasn't interested. We took the actress and puppet off the screen, which pleased the client.
She even said, "See, was that so difficult?" We resumed filming, but the client became confused and annoyed again, asking, "Why isn't the puppet moving?" I had to explain, "Because you asked us to remove the puppeteer". And her rebuff was, "Can't you use some Hollywood magic to make it move?"
47. Out Of Control
I used to work in a mobile phone shop where most of my day was spent clarifying to customers that we don't have control over Facebook, their email, or any other troublesome apps, simply because they're available on the phones we sell.
There was this one woman, the "demand to talk to the manager" type, who showed up insisting that we use our computer to fix her locked iPhone and Apple ID. She couldn't remember her password which had gotten her locked out, and her kid's attempt to bypass the problem with a factory reset hadn't helped matters.
Executing a reset on an iPhone linked to an AppleID renders the phone completely unusable. Without her password, she couldn't even switch on the phone. I tried explaining to her that she'd need to get in touch with Apple, as they are the device's creators and her AppleID is registered with them.
She didn't take it well at all and blew up on the spot, exclaiming, "So you sell a product, but you don't provide support for your product?!?!" I was about to remind her once again that we don't manufacture the phones when my colleague interjected, "Lady, Walmart also sells these phones. Have you ever expected them to fix your phone?"
Stunned, she sputtered for a moment before storming out, grumbling about calling the authorities.
48. It Was A Bad Sign
I once took a turn as a volunteer cashier at a secondhand bookstore for the library. It wasn't my usual job but I found myself doing it quite often. One day, an elder gentleman walked in and bought a huge pile of books for just 10 dollars.
He was incredibly friendly and loved to chat, although it seemed like he wasn't completely mentally sharp. No biggie, I just had to explain the concept of sales tax and the pricing of the books a few times.
He decided to pay using his credit card so I guided him on how to sign on the touchscreen for the payment to be processed. Things became a tad unusual after this. He asked my name, a request I had seldom received from customers, but I told him.
He then picked up the iPad and announced that he was going to sign my name instead of his, so "they" would know where to send the money. Before I could clarify the misunderstanding, he had already hit submit.
I couldn't catch a glimpse of his receipt, but he kept praising me and insisting that I keep the change, leading me to believe his intentions were authentic. Still, his action left me dumbstruck, making me wonder if signing cashier names is something he's been doing ever since he got a credit card.
Luckily, credit card companies barely ever verify these signatures.
49. Fusion Food
In my job at an Italian eatery, I served a man who fancied a salad. Easy as pie, I mused. Boy, was I mistaken! As I enquired about his dressing choice, he kept steering towards our pasta sauces. He'd suggest, "Sugo's a fancy topping, isn’t it? Let's go with that".
Politely, I tried to clarify, "Respectfully, sir, those sauces pair with pasta. You've ordered a Mediterranean salad". His comeback was, "Oh, you're right. How about Carbonara then?"—yet another pasta sauce.
Try as I might, I couldn't understand his confusion. He seemed like an intelligent guy, but couldn't fathom the distinction between a salad dressing and a pasta sauce.
50. Before Or After Life?
I worked as a private detective and was sifting through a case. I tracked down an elderly couple who were pals with the individual in question, who would sometimes drop by their home. I questioned them about the victim's last visit, and their reply proved to be the missing piece of the puzzle.
Instead of a straightforward answer, they spent around five minutes bickering...debating if it was before or after they had allegedly gotten rid of him.
Sources: Reddit, .
